Comments originally posted in Current commercials

By Afix (Afix) on Tuesday, October 12, 1999 - 12:52 pm:

In the new Coke commercial with no dialog, there is a girl pouring a glass of Coke, then almost drinking it, laughing, and finally taking a sip. As the view changes from side to front and back again, the Coke logo on the glass stays prominently in front of the viewer.
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By Scott McClenny on Wednesday, October 13, 1999 - 12:17 am:

Just wondering but in the Taco Time commercial where the gal and her date come back and they find the Taco Time guy and his dog in her house, how'd he get in in the first place?
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By norman on Sunday, October 17, 1999 - 02:54 am:

What ever happened in the Taster's Choice saga, after the husband returns and shares Taster's Choice with his wife (I assume ex-wife) and her current lover returns? I don't recall ever seeing another episode after that one. (Maybe someone who saw the original series of commercials can answer?)
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By Aaron Dotter on Sunday, October 17, 1999 - 01:54 pm:

Has anyone seen the latest Army commercial? I think they got the Borg as a spokesperson. A couple of times you can hear "I am an American Soldier" in a Borg-type voice. Perhaps the Army is in the assimilation business?
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By MarkN on Tuesday, October 19, 1999 - 08:08 am:

Norman, I don't know about the woman or her son in those ads but the man has a new love in his life. Well, two, now that I think about it. One is with a teen girl who kicks vampire and demon ass and the other is her mom, with whom he's had sex at least twice before.
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By Dude on Wednesday, October 20, 1999 - 10:04 pm:

How that Anti-Tobacco ad that looks practically identical to a movie ad?

hat sticks one to those bastards!
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By Keith Alan Morgan on Thursday, October 21, 1999 - 05:38 am:

In the Jeda commercial about the full size spare, the one guy mentions the Coelocanth and says it was thought to have gone extinct over 10,000 years ago. How can a guy who correctly pronounces the name, and knows that it was found off the coast of Madagascar, not know that it was believed to have gone extinct over 75 million years ago? If he had said 75,000 years, I would have let it slide because it was just the number of zeros he messed up, but how do you mentally confuse 75 million with 10,000?

There's a series of Christian Rock commercials. In one commercial the CR fan has his headphones on and there is a couple across from him. The plug comes out of the player, so others can hear it, he looks up and sees that the couple is into it.
However in a later commercial, this same couple looks at him disapprovingly about his choice of music.
I find a certain irony to these commercials as the CR fan keeps running afoul of authority figures while trying to enjoy his music, not unlike what early Rock & Roll fans encountered from authority figures who felt Rock was the "devil's music."
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By Dan R. on Thursday, October 21, 1999 - 07:11 pm:

Aaron, LOL! I was thinking the same thing when I saw that commercial. I was just ready to hear "we are the borg...join the army...resistance is futile."
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By Keith Alan Morgan on Sunday, October 24, 1999 - 09:37 am:

I think it's actually a commercial for Texaco, but it features and old man and woman and she's going to the plastic surgeon and comments that he is supposed to be a miracle worker, and when she gets picked up she looks completely different, about 40-60 years younger, and much thinner, also her hair which had been short, curly and red, is now long, straight and blonde (I guess the doctor is also a hairstylist;-) and the straps of her dress are now thinner (as well as being a tailor;-).
I wonder if the Doctor's name is McCoy?
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By Keith Alan Morgan on Tuesday, October 26, 1999 - 10:59 am:

In a recent Dennis Miller spot (forget what he's selling) he mentions buying a 5 gallon jar of mayo is like using a Cruise missile to light a cigarette. Well, I suppose it depends on who's smoking.

Need a light Saddam?

Heeheeheeheehee

The spots for AT&T's family plan, where everyone in the family gets a cell phone, seems like a good way to get people to not want cell phones. It seems like every commercial features the people passing the buck and making it hard on the last person called.
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By ScottN on Tuesday, October 26, 1999 - 11:46 am:

He's pushing 10-10-220.
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By Chris Thomas on Thursday, November 4, 1999 - 09:41 am:

Here's one for the Aussies: the Lynx deodorant commercial.
Guy sprays himself with Lynx in the lift, dorky guy goes in. Hot babe joins him, gets all hot for him. They come out and a little bit of love-making has been implied, then dorky guy has been faced with another guy, blonde girl, grandma and big dog having the same reaction (all alternative endings).
The nit is this: the hot babe has a bit of hair that hangs over forehead on one side. Then, in a close of her face, about the time she bites her lip, it's on the *other* side for a few seconds before magically returning to the way it was.
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By KAM on Saturday, November 6, 1999 - 11:38 am:

The commercial for the Warner Brother edition of the Chevy Venture. Now if it's got the WB name on it shouldn't it be the Chevy Acme? It can be equipped with rockets, dynamite, extra springs, wings and a hood ornament of Wile E. Coyote reaching out to grab that darned roadrunner. ;-)
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By KAM II, the Sequel on Saturday, November 6, 1999 - 11:40 am:

Oh, and it comes with a map where every left turn is at Alberquerque.
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By Lisa Shock on Sunday, November 14, 1999 - 02:56 pm:

I've discovered a general nit about modern commercials. I began taping episodes of NG right from the beginning in 1987. If you go back and look at the commercials on the early tapes, in fast forward mode, the people's arms and legs flail about and the action is pretty comical. In 1989 you start to see ads that look ok in fast forward: the product name stays up long enough to see it, movement is smooth, and the message/story is easy to understand.
I guess ad agencies caught on to the fact that many of us tape shows to watch later (like when I have to work) or to watch over and over - and they started designing and editing the ads for the VCR!
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By Chris Booton (Cbooton) on Sunday, November 14, 1999 - 03:42 pm:

Just saw a new one:

it's january 1 2000 (as indicated by the famous new years music playing) ,a guy is taking a jog and all arround him is chaos, car crashes becuase traffic lights don't work, missles going off, tanks etc. And at the end it says "just do it".
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By MarkN on Monday, November 15, 1999 - 12:50 am:

Yeah, I think I've seen that one. Pretty lame.
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By Scott McClenny on Tuesday, November 16, 1999 - 04:36 pm:

I forget exactly which company it is,I think it's Lexxus,but they have an ad that starts:
"Ever wonder why Superheroes don't have children?"
Ummm..obviously whoever wrote the ad isn't a big comic book fan..at least not of Marvel 'cause the last time I checked Peter and Mary Jane Parker had a teenaged daugther named May;then there's Reed and Sue Richards who are the parents of Franklin; and I believe Scott Summers is the father of Nate Gray in the X-Men..THAT one is admittedly complicated..And in D.C. continuum Johnny Quick was the father of Jessie Quick..well..you get the drift...
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By Lisa Shock on Tuesday, November 16, 1999 - 11:41 pm:

All I can think of when I see the one where the announcer says "ever wonder why superheroes don't have children?" is a short story by Larry Niven called "Man of Steel, Woman of Kleenex". -Don't ask, just find a copy and read it! (It's only 2 or 3 pages long.)
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By Matthew Patterson (Mpatterson) on Wednesday, November 17, 1999 - 12:10 am:

Here's a question I've had for a while. We're in the middle of a "bad 70's music" revolution. That is, Mello Yellow, Shake Your Groove Thing, etc. Why can't the commercial people find some GOOD 70s songs to use? I Will Survive, Believe (not 70s, but sounds like it, etc.)
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By Lea Frost on Wednesday, November 17, 1999 - 01:37 am:

Lisa, here's a link to it!

http://www.blueneptune.com/~svw/superman.html
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By Keith Alan Morgan on Wednesday, November 17, 1999 - 03:46 am:

First Matthew, you're assuming there was good music in the 70's. ;-)
Second, the copyright holders of the good music probably do not want their music cheapened by using it as a jingle, while the bad music copyright holders are more than willing to make a buck.

Lisa: The article is more than 2 or 3 pages long. It can be found in Niven's book Convergent Series.

Scott: Aquaman had Aquababy in the late 60's, early 70's. Also Batman Of The Future (50's) was the descendent of Batman, and in the 30th century Laurel Kent (70's) was Superman's descendant, while Don & Dawn Allen (60's) were the Flash's descendents.
There were also plenty of imaginary stories which featured DC heroes aging and having kids.
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By Mark Morgan on Wednesday, November 17, 1999 - 10:27 am:

Yeah, and on the X-titles, Jean Grey and Scott Summers seem to be parents to most of the supporting cast. Not just one Nathan, but X-Man, Cable, and maybe Phoenix....

Not a nit, but a complaint: not only are those 10-10 dialaround numbers no savings, but the human brain can only memorize about seven numbers at one time. Soon, we'll all be living in "The President's Analyst" and have implants in our heads for our phone numbers.

Best commercial coincidence recently spotted: right after Fry and the group discover the secret of Slurm on "Futurama"...they run the Coke commercial with a woman practically achieving the Eucharist over a glass of cola.
Hmmm....that drink's not still warm, is it?
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By Afix on Wednesday, November 17, 1999 - 12:09 pm:

Mark: That's the commercial that prompted this entire board!
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By Mark Morgan on Wednesday, November 17, 1999 - 02:16 pm:

Note to self: check the board before posting.

At least I caught the previous mention to Nathan Summers at the last second before I posted.

The timing was hilarious: Fry finds out why Slurm is so addictive..then, cut to the addictive quality of Coke! As I told a friend recently, I just about peed me kilt.
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By KAM on Wednesday, November 17, 1999 - 09:30 pm:

Hmmmm, so what's Scott Summers relationshp to Buffy Summers?
Whoops, way off topic.

They have a commercial for Victoria's Secret. In one shot they show a close-up of the bra-wearing supermodel's chest and she says, "One thing you can't have."
Funny, it looked like two things I couldn't have.
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By Lisa Shock on Wednesday, November 17, 1999 - 11:29 pm:

I don't know if anyone still condiders him a superhero, but the Phantom has been the son of a Phantom for several generations...
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By MarkN on Thursday, November 18, 1999 - 08:10 am:

Yeah, KAM. They sell Wonder Bras, so-called cuz you wonder whether what's underneath is real or fake or just pushed up.
Then again, who cares? The chicks are babes!
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By ScottN on Thursday, November 18, 1999 - 12:19 pm:

I kind of like the new Lincoln LS commercials. You know, where they morph the scene around the car?
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By MarkN on Friday, November 19, 1999 - 05:35 am:

Like the waterfall, or the bridge or hot air balloon that takes the shape of the Lincold grill? BTW, Scott, it's just over a month away that you'll be on Win Ben Stein's Money, right? I'll make sure to watch it. Did you say hi to all your nitpicking friends on the show?
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By margie on Friday, November 19, 1999 - 08:45 am:

There's one on now for Arizona jeans. A guy is in a batting cage, taking his cuts, when two girls walk by and comment on him.
He stops to stare at the girls and inadvertantly drifts in front of the strike zone. The next baseball comes straight at him. You never see it hit him, but you just know he got it in the family jewels! My sister's fiance cringes whenever it's on!
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By ScottN on Friday, November 19, 1999 - 12:08 pm:

Sorry, I didn't say hi to them. I was too busy trying to win HIS money. Yes, it's about a month away...

Remember, Nitpickers, December 22, 7:30 or 11:30 PM on Comedy Central! (Note to those who live in the Midwest... That MAY be 6:30 or 10:30 central time, your milage may vary).
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By MarkN on Saturday, November 20, 1999 - 06:43 am:

I'm tired of scenes of males getting it in the 'nads. It's really trite by now and never was really very funny to begin with, most especially to us males, of course. We never see females get hit there on home video shows, or ads or wherever, nor should we, so we shouldn't see males get hit there anymore. On practically every "America's Funniest Home Videos" show they had at least one videoclip showing a male of any age getting it in the 'nads. That, plus Bob Saget's totally unfunny bits ruined the show, as if anything could've really saved it anyway. BTW, did anyone ever wonder if the audience reactions they always showed were shown right at whatever particular clip, or did they show them laughing at Saget's preshow monologs (assuming he did them) and just inserted them in between videoclips in order to make even the unfunniest videos seem funny? You know, in much the way that laughtracks are used on sitcoms. I'm kinda surprised that they still do that, too, but not by much.

Ok, that' it for now, to avoid getting even more offtopic.
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By a womyn on Monday, November 22, 1999 - 01:57 pm:

I think the reason they never show women getting hit in that area is because that areas not as sensitive on a woman as on a man. I mean, it is sensitive, but not as much, and it's harder to hit the sensitive area.

I agree about Bob Saget. I started muting the tv during his speeches & just listened to the videos themselves. Then I gave up and stopped watching the show.
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By Afix on Tuesday, November 23, 1999 - 01:35 pm:

Scott N: Re: your upcoming stint on Win Ben Stein's Money. Interesting -- Exactly 20 years ago almost to the day I was on Wheel of Fortune!
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By ScottN, no space, owner of the CaptialN trademark on Tuesday, November 23, 1999 - 04:13 pm:

BEN STEIN WATCH.... Less than one month until I try to win *HIS* money.

Also, Afix, there is no space before the N. That capital N is trademarked, you know, just ask MarkN.
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By MarkN on Wednesday, November 24, 1999 - 06:57 am:

Yeah, well, you did it first before me, Scott.

Anyway, what date was the show taped on? My sister has some friends whose daughter was on The Price Is Right, which was shown in May of 1995 or '96, I think it was. I went with my sister and her family to their friends' after an Easter picnic and their daughter mentioned being on TPIR and that it'd be shown in May, so I taped it cuz I had to work and sure enough there she was. She got to Contestant's Row but was beat out by one dollar from some dork next to her, but she'd already told us that happened so it wasn't a big surprise when I saw it. Still, I've never known anyone who was actually on a game show.
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By margie on Wednesday, November 24, 1999 - 08:38 am:

I auditioned for Jeopardy in June. Boy, was that test hard! I didn't make it, but I think I got close.
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By ScottN, Game Show Wizard on Wednesday, November 24, 1999 - 12:27 pm:

In the immortal words of Wierd Al, "I Lost at Jeopardy!" - March of 1991 (I don't remember the actual air date)
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By Keith Alan Morgan on Thursday, November 25, 1999 - 09:31 pm:

OK, it's not a current commercial anymore, but it's not a favorite or worst either, so I'll stick it here.
About a year or so ago they were running these commercials for a cell phone company (Air Touch???) and the commercials featured a blind man as the spokesman. In one spot 'competitors' wanting to get ahold of the latest advancements stole his briefcase. The odd thing about this, is that they replaced his briefcase with a fake and the fake had the same logo printed on the side. He's blind. How could he see if the logo was missing?
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By G'var on Friday, November 26, 1999 - 08:57 pm:

The Nike commercial with the Y2Khaos is a very funny one to me. I work in CIS and think all this ballyhoo about Y2k being the end of the world is very funny. Still though I would stay on the ground on Dec 31/jan 1. Bought some microwave popcorn and it expired in jan 6th 1900. So not everybody has everything worked out.
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By ScottN on Thursday, December 2, 1999 - 07:53 pm:

A local Mercedes-Benz commercial has all the MB support people saying, "If you need [this, that, or the other], we'll be there". And ends with a spokesman saying, "If you forget your anniversary [long pause]..., you're screwed!" I thought that was very funny.
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By Dan R. on Thursday, December 2, 1999 - 09:49 pm:

its not just your area. We have it hear in DC too. I thought it was pretty funny too...and I can't say that too often about car commercials! ;-)
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By MarkN on Friday, December 3, 1999 - 06:48 am:

One series of ads that kinda blows me away are the De Beers jewelry ones, I think it is. You know, the ones with the silhouettes that wear diamond rings on their shadowy fingers. I always wonder just how they do that, but I'm sure it's really quite simple.
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By ScottN on Friday, December 3, 1999 - 11:21 am:

Another commercial like the MBZ one is on the local radio here in L.A., for a jewelry store.

"A gift is not a test. It is not a test of your love for her, or if you know her size, or [several other things it's not a test of]....
UNLESS... you get it wrong. Then you'll find out just how much of a test it was."
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By Afix on Friday, December 3, 1999 - 12:03 pm:

Anyone know what the music is for those jewelry ads? Is it original music or a section of an existing classical piece?

Truth to tell, I never knew the name of the jewelry company, but remember the ads and the music quite well.
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By Dan R. on Friday, December 3, 1999 - 12:25 pm:

Contiuning something I said on the Worst Commercials board...the Family Guy on FOX had a spoof of De Beers one time...the show the silhoutte and the guy putting a diamond ring on her finger...then the shadows kiss and she begins to go down to her knees...it then breaks away with "De Beers...she'll pretty much have to." I cracked up when I saw this cause I was glad to see that I'm not the only one to think that the jewellers of the world seem to equate getting lucky with giving a woman diamonds..:-)
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By Slinky Frog on Friday, December 3, 1999 - 10:30 pm:

I love those De Beers ads, brings out the emotionalism in me. I think though, that's the original music in them, to answer a previous's poster's question. Has anyone seen the Y2k one? That really gets me, emotionally. They are at New York Square, and he gives her the necklace, and she kisses him, and the year ends. Kinda getcha, right there! Plus, have you noticed something different about this ad, compared to the previous ones. These people are not silliouettes! you actually see there faces. As for the technique done, in the previous ones. It just looks like they place the jewlry there, and put the sillouette over it. I think.
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By MarkN on Saturday, December 4, 1999 - 07:01 am:

I thought maybe it was done by CGI.
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By ScottN on Wednesday, December 8, 1999 - 02:55 am:

I saw a cool Nike commercial. Some guy gets up and goes out to go jogging. His calendar shows Jan 1, 2000. As he leaves his building, in the background, you see an APC. As he jogs, you see scenes of Y2K chaos. He jogs on oblivious until he sees his jogging buddy, and nods hello to him.

The incongruity of the normalcy of the guy's morning run contrasted with the chaos in the background is extremely well done.
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By KAM on Wednesday, December 8, 1999 - 02:49 pm:

ScottN: I believe somebody mentioned that commercial on the Worst Commercials board. ;-)

Does anyone remember an odd series of commercials where a scientist is coming up with weird things like a bullet-proof banana or a banana with a zipper?
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By Keith Alan Morgan on Friday, December 10, 1999 - 10:43 am:

A Tommy Girl commercial features a girl trying to meet this guy, then the tagline is that Tommy Girl is a "Declaration of independance." Hmmmm. While I suppose it's possible that she might just use him and dump, 10 to 1 she's hoping that he will become her boyfriend which would make her somewhat dependant on him, thereby contradicting the "Declaration of independance" statement.

Anyone seen the Western Union commercial featuring the gal who played Mary Ann on Gilligan's Island? Cute commercial, very cute.
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By MarkN on Monday, December 13, 1999 - 04:05 am:

Dawn Wells played Mary Ann, and funny you should mention her cuz right now I'm watching E!'s True Hollywood Story on Gilligan's Island. Here's her webpage, if anyone's interested.

http://www.dawn-wells.com/

Now, can anyone tell me where I can find Elf Cheerleaders in Love? I'd really like to see it.
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By Keith Alan Morgan on Thursday, December 30, 1999 - 11:52 pm:

I think it's a Geico Insurance commercial, but they show people wearing these helmets with cups on the side & straws that lead to their mouths and a person is going around pouring coffee into the cups.

Hot coffee sucked through a straw... I did that once as a child and burned my tongue.

I know it's supposed to be a joke, but you would think that an insurance company would realize the risks of that situation and try to find another, safer way to do the spot.
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By Dan R. on Friday, December 31, 1999 - 01:13 am:

Well true but they are a car insurance company not a health insurance company...but also...you'd think they'd realize the danger of staying awake 24 hours as they try and demonstrate their employees doing in the commercials. And driving after being awake for that long is quite dangerous.
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By MarkN on Friday, December 31, 1999 - 05:15 am:

I just saw a new ad. It's a new shampoo called Fa, and has a pretty blonde young woman in a white onepiece swimsuit swimming in the ocean and running on the beach. After watching it, all I can say is, "Pa love Fa!" (Ok, who gets that reference?)
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By MarkN on Friday, December 31, 1999 - 06:02 am:

Oh, yeah. There's that one with the young couple in a big white emptiness, looking for a new minivan. They call out what they want and a whole bunch of them flip over in various colors. Then they say SUVs and ditto. It's a pretty ridiculous ad, to say the least.
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By ScottN on Friday, December 31, 1999 - 05:33 pm:

How about that Nixoral shampoo ad? Doesn't the girl look like the girl from Farscape?
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By donnysan on Saturday, January 1, 2000 - 02:26 am:

My favorite ads of recent vintage have been for Budget Rent A Car, showing a group at an ad agency brain storming various promotions. One says "How about: Rent a Ranger for a day, BE a Ranger for a day!" Cut to shot of a guy dressed up like a park ranger bending over a bear..."Ohhhh, what a CUTE bear!" he says as he feeds the bear something. The bear then projectile vomits on him, and, dripping, he says "I don't want to be a Ranger anymore!" Disgusting, but I laughed hard at that one.
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By MarkN on Saturday, January 1, 2000 - 03:17 am:

I don't know, Scott. I've only seen Farscape once or twice in San Diego when my brother got married down there, and we don't get the Sci-Fi Channel here unless you pay for the digital cable service. I just get the basic.

So, no Y2Kaos yet! Someone said on tv that it may take a few days till anything happens but I'm not worried.

By ScottN on Monday, January 3, 2000 - 12:16 am:

I think I may be sick... I just now (2115 PST) saw a commercial for Priceline.com, that starred Shatner singing "Convoy"!
I have to reach for the pepto right now...

Ironically, it was shown during a commercial break during "Funniest Commercials..."

Incidentally, the show had at least one of those hysterically funny outpost.com commercials (the marching band with the wolves).
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By Dan R. on Monday, January 3, 2000 - 04:16 pm:

Shatner singing??? Nooooo...say it aint so!!! Are you sure you didn't have a really spicy pizza right before bedtime and it was just a night mare? ;-)
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By ScottN on Monday, January 3, 2000 - 04:53 pm:

Shatner singing??? Nooooo...say it aint so!!! Are you sure you didn't have a really spicy pizza right before bedtime and it was just a night mare? ;-)

I only wish it had been a nightmare... Shatner singing... the horror, the horror...
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By Dan R. on Monday, January 3, 2000 - 07:04 pm:

you have my deepest sympothies for having to witness shatner singing...;-)
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By MarkN on Tuesday, January 4, 2000 - 06:05 am:

Shatner singing??? Nooooo...say it aint so!!!
I can vouch for this, too, cuz I've seen it now, and it ain't purty. It's not as bad as some other ads any of us could name but it was pretty dumb. I wondered if he did it before or after his wife's death, perhaps in order to help deal with it or something?
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By MarkN on Tuesday, January 4, 2000 - 06:28 am:

So, who's ready to call Jenny Craig? Didja see Monica Lewinsky's new ad? I've called them some years ago and they wouldn't give me any info over the phone and insisted I come down there, which I did reluctantly. Guess what they did? Gave me a tour of the place and then they presumed to sign my up without my saying yes yet, so I left. And all the women there looked like they seriously needed to eat something! What? Do they try making people (read, women) feel guilty about being heavy? Is that their strategy to "helping" people lose weight? And as if that's not bad enough, they charge way too much for their food, and perhaps they try guilttripping people into thinking they have to buy it, or the program won't work. Well, it's been awhile so maybe they've changed somewhat, I dunno.

Monica was on Larry King Monday night, did very well, and looked pretty good. Love her or hate her, she's trying to put that whole scandal thing behind her and start her life over again. After all, that all happened in the last millenium so I think it's time to leave it there and move forward.
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By Dan R. on Tuesday, January 4, 2000 - 12:43 pm:

You too mark? Oh, you and scott have my sympothies now...I just hope I never have to witness the commercial...;-)
I haven't seen the Jenny commercials with Ms. BJ herself but I have heard about all the customers of Jenny who are quitting because of Monica and heard of those who will never go to JC because of her. Everyone seems to hate her...
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By Mark Morgan on Wednesday, January 5, 2000 - 12:46 am:

Nitpicking starts to get in your brain. There was an ad for a local flower shop where this woman was trying to get ready to go to work while a barrage of noise drowned her out, including a telephone ringing. All well and good. Except two things happened at once:

1. She began to talking to someone at work over the phone (grainy, echo effect).
2. The phone hung up with a loud dial tone.

What, did she pick up two lines simultaneously? That's a great phone! Especially since both lines shared one ring...
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By MarkN on Wednesday, January 5, 2000 - 08:13 am:

Ms. BJ herself
I like that. Very funny. I've no hard feelings towards her myself. I don't care what she did or with whom but I think it's ridiculous that anyone would leave JC's program just cuz she's their spokesperson now. I mean, there are so many other, much better reasons for leaving JC than that.

Hmm. I just thought of something. Jenny Craig. Jesus Christ. JC. Co-inkie dinkie? Subtle message (What would Jesus do?)?
You be the judge.
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By Dan R. on Wednesday, January 5, 2000 - 12:40 pm:

Yep good ol' Ms. BJ...we washingtonians can think of a million names for her...;-)
I think most of the customers probs have to do with them thinking she is a home wrecker...not just any home wrecker...a white house wrecker...though clinton is just a guilty.
Anyone see her on Larry King (er...the show not on himself...LOL)? Seems she first learned about this whole scandal story going public on the Drudge report...fascinating...;-)

WWJD? What Would Jenny Do? ;-)
though WWJE? would be more approriate...What Would Jenny Eat? :-)
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By ScottN on Thursday, January 6, 2000 - 12:57 am:

Dateline ran a segment tonight on that Lincoln LS (I think) commercial... the one that's Escher-ish in that it goes through several levels...

Very fascinating indeed.
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By MarkN on Thursday, January 6, 2000 - 08:06 am:

Yes, Scott, I saw that was thinking of commenting on it, too. I don't remember if I've seen the ad before but it was fascinating watching how it was made all the same, although you could tell the castle/rook was a composite. At least I could.

Yes, Dan. I saw her on LKL Monday night. She did ok, I thought, but just.
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By Mark Morgan on Thursday, January 6, 2000 - 09:49 am:

A report in my newspaper this morning says, "Some Jenny Craig franchises are refusing to run the new Monica Lewinsky ads, saying the former White House intern at the center of President Clinton's impeachment scandal is not and appropriate role model." They quote one franchise owner in Iowa who'd rather run the old ones than pay for the new ones. "I wouldn't be pleased if my daughter came home and said, 'I want to be just like Monica Lewisnky.'" (Compiled from wire reports.)
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By XNZ on Thursday, January 6, 2000 - 12:23 pm:

Makes one wonder what you're supposed to swallow on that program.
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By Dan R. getting sicker by the minute on Thursday, January 6, 2000 - 07:15 pm:

LOL XNZ, I was thinking it'd be more like those shake diets...you know what I mean..."One in the morning...one in the afternoon...then a sensible dinner..." and according to the Blair Witch Project board it only has 8 calories per load...;-)
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By MarkN on Friday, January 7, 2000 - 06:46 am:

Well, I think it's time those people grew up and left Monica alone. They've got no right to judge her when they don't know her personally or anything about her, other than what they see on tv, in the paper or online, and really, just how much can you believe about anyone or anything these days when the media report it?
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By Keith Alan Morgan on Saturday, January 8, 2000 - 01:46 am:

Anyone else notice that McDonald's has replaced the actor who plays Ronald? The new guy's hair seems a touch disheveled, and he acts a bit like Michael Keaton in Beetlejuice.
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By Lea Frost on Saturday, January 8, 2000 - 02:16 am:

Anyone else seen that Nike ad with Lance Armstrong? I don't think I've ever heard the word "ass" in a commercial before...
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By MarkN on Saturday, January 8, 2000 - 05:38 am:

I wasn't sure I'd ever heard of him before, let alone seen his ad but here's his personal website, where I read a bit about him. Then I remembered him.
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By Dan R. on Saturday, January 8, 2000 - 07:18 pm:

Yeah I've seen one commercial with the new guy...he looks a lot like the other one except the hair.
BTW...getting back to Shatner singing....anyone watch ET a few days ago? I missed it but heard about it on a morning talk show of B102.7 in Baltimore...apparently...Shatner wants to start singing and do a tour....disturbing, no?
;-)
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By ScottN on Sunday, January 9, 2000 - 01:55 am:

He's got another now, where he does "Aquarius"...

Please, make it stop... [sobs], make it stop!
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By MarkN on Sunday, January 9, 2000 - 08:46 am:

Scott, the Aquarius one is the only one I've seen so far.

Well, now I've seen Lance's Nike ad, and right after saying I hadn't! Funny how things work out sometimes.
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By Lea Frost on Sunday, January 9, 2000 - 02:46 pm:

Actually, I saw that ad last night on ABC, and at the end he says "on my bike six hours a day," whereas in the version I saw on ESPN, it's "busting my ass six hours a day"...

Haven't seen the Shatner singing ads, though. Which is good.
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By ScottN on Sunday, January 9, 2000 - 07:15 pm:

MarkN, he also does one with "Convoy".

"D*mn it, Jim, you're a Captain, not a singer!" - Dr. McCoy
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By Dan R. on Sunday, January 9, 2000 - 07:31 pm:

Scott...Convoy??? Oh please make it stop!
I think that this could put an end to the Religous Musing boards....all these Shatner singing commercials...there is no god!!!!
;-) j/k
Its almost as bad as when Homer Simpson sang Convoy....sad sad sad.
I havent seen the lance one...but I coulda swore that I saw a SUV (possibly Ford Expedition) and they said ass too....its something with a guy going up to the mountains and how the SUV gets him there and if it didnt...he would freeze his ass or something.
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By MarkN on Monday, January 10, 2000 - 03:04 am:

Lea, I heard the one where Lance says "ass" in it. Thanks, Scott. Like I really needed that image stuck in my head now! LOL
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By kellkan on Monday, January 10, 2000 - 04:02 pm:

This isn't a commercial, but it's still TV....
has anyone else seen REM on Sesame street doing "Scary Happy Monsters" with the muppets? It's GREAT! They even made up a muppet to look like Kate Pearson that sang the harmony! It's totally manic-depressive and funny! They all jump around when they sing the verse about being happy, then they all drag around when they sing a verse about being sad. (Sung to the tune of "Shining Happy People")
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By Charles Cabe (Ccabe) on Monday, January 10, 2000 - 05:08 pm:

The ad with Jason Alexander outside a movie theater his a giant plot hole. He only has enough cash to buy a ticket for the movie, but not his date. However, he buys a soda and jumbo popcorn. He should have spent the money to buy a ticket, because if he skipped the popcor and coke, he should have had enough to buy the ticket. (BTW, the ticket stub in the ad has the title "Alone" on it.)
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By ScottN on Monday, January 10, 2000 - 06:24 pm:

He didn't buy the ticket with cash... he used his Visa. The whole point is that he's lying to her.

Rather an interesting premise to sell something... Personally, I think that commercial is stoopid.
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By Nathan K. on Monday, January 10, 2000 - 08:50 pm:

What annoys me about that commercial is that it's set up at first to make us think they're leaving the movie theater, and only at the end is it revealed that they just got there and Alexander's character is a jerk. Well, his date reacts as if she thinks that too. She should already know that it's the beginning of the date instead of the end and at least be annoyed that she's not going to get to see the movie instead of only grimacing when Alexander says "next time I'll bring enough cash for both of us."

Does that make sense?
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By Mark Morgan on Monday, January 10, 2000 - 11:09 pm:

Man, I gotta spend less time at this board. This nitpicking is getting a little out of hand. For example, I was watching a Planter's peanuts commercial where a dog digs out a likeness of Mr. Peanut to show he wants some peanuts. Meanwhile, I'm sitting there thinking, "There is no way that dog dug out those legs, they're too small for him to have fit in while he was digging."
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By RM on Tuesday, January 18, 2000 - 01:06 am:

Hey,
has anyone seen that new anti-drug commercial, where the kid is talking about how he talked with his parents and wouldn't use drugs, but all of his friends try to offer him pot. It wasn't that long ago that I left high school, and aside from a few kids, not that many smoked pot. Yet, somehow, this kid ends up hanging around with all the potheads and keeps insisting that he won't smoke it. Does anyone really believe that a kid who says that he won't use drugs really end up hanging out with all the potheads.
Everytime that commercial comes on, I feel like screaming that it doesn't matter about him not smoking pot because he's getting high off all the secondhand smoke.
Ending rant and taking deep breaths to calm down.

And about la Monica, I've stopped wathcing Jeopardy because that Jenny Craig commercial was on Jeopardy and I don't feel like ever seeing her face again, in my life. I just hope they don't start showing that commercial on the shows I like to watch, I don't know how long I can go boycotting series while missing the important new episodes.
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By ScottN on Tuesday, January 18, 2000 - 11:36 am:

Current Billboard...

de Beers.

Shows a pair of diamond earrings, and the copy reads

No, you wife didn't put us up to this...
(though she did give us your route home)...

What do you think? I thought it was rather clever.
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By Afix (Afix) on Tuesday, January 18, 2000 - 12:28 pm:

The subtitle on that billboard is so small it's difficult to read -- I almost drove off the road trying to see what it said.

BTW, ScottN, you must take I-94 home from work too, huh? My route home also.
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By ScottN on Tuesday, January 18, 2000 - 02:53 pm:

No, I live in Los Angeles. I see it on surface streets.
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By Dan R. on Tuesday, January 18, 2000 - 11:47 pm:

There's a current one in DC that I'm surprised they got away with...for some reason a guy is running up stairs to give flowers to a woman...I cant tell if its a delivery guy or something but hes trying to say a name and hes out of breath so he ends up huffing and puffing and saying "Pe...Nis..." but he is trying to say a name...its for a sports club and I found it funny like heck.
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By KAM on Wednesday, January 19, 2000 - 05:01 am:

There's an Immodium AD commercial involving a radio host. At the beginning the caller says, he is having trouble with his girlfriend, but at the end he asks if he should have invited his mother on the honeymoon. How long was that phone call?
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By MarkN on Wednesday, January 19, 2000 - 08:17 am:

I kept meaning to mention the Immodium ad myself. It's pretty ridiculous to think someone would just go on for so long about his girlfriend probs without asking the radio host any questions about those probs. Remember, about 99.99% of all ads (at least on tv) are false, if not in what they say about the product or service but the visual presentation as well.
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By Dan R. on Wednesday, January 19, 2000 - 03:39 pm:

KAM, I know you're nitting that he said girlfriend at the start then mentioned a honeymoon refering to him having a wife...its not necessarily a nit...he could have gf probs....his gf might have a problem with him going on a honeymoon!!!!! ;-)
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By ScottN on Wednesday, January 19, 2000 - 04:48 pm:

Maybe he isn't married yet, and he invited his mom to come on their (future) honeymoon, and his gf got really really ticked off about it...
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By margie on Wednesday, January 26, 2000 - 01:51 pm:

There's an updated Polaner All Fruit commercial out now. The guy who originally said, "Would you please pass the jelly?" now says "All Fruit." They date it as 10 years later. Can anyone believe it's been 10 years since the original came out?

I wish they'd run the original once in a while, especially for those who never saw it or don't remember it. It would help the new one to make more sense.
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By John on Monday, February 7, 2000 - 07:57 pm:

Actually that guy in the coffee commercials may have a 3rd love. 5 years ago there was a certain young woman in Pasadena who worked for the phone company and who had a computer and 1000's of dollars worth of VR equipment at home and I think he was quite fond of her.
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By Keith Alan Morgan on Wednesday, February 9, 2000 - 01:46 am:

There's a Pepsi One commercial on a boat where the soda cans slide back & forth so and the people don't notice when they are drinking Coke or Pepsi One. Is it really a good idea to advertise your product by indicating that it tastes the same as a competitor?
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By Butch Brookshier on Wednesday, February 9, 2000 - 10:24 pm:

The "Singing Shatner Horror" continues. Today on the radio I heard a new ad with him mangling Cheap Trick's "I Want You to Want Me" It's every bit as bad as you would expect.
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By ScottN on Thursday, February 10, 2000 - 01:28 am:

So what have we got so far?

* Convoy
* Aquarius
* I Want You to Want Me

I'm sure there are more.

Comments originally posted in Commercials: The Kitchen Sink, and how to clean it (or: General Ruminations)
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This section is for anything else related to commercials, or ads in general.
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By Pitch Man on Thursday, December 16, 1999 - 11:51 am:

Scrubbing Bubbles!

(How to clean your sink.)
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By Afix on Thursday, December 16, 1999 - 01:29 pm:

They work hard so you don't have tooooooooooooo!
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By ScottN on Thursday, December 16, 1999 - 01:53 pm:

And, after your scrubbing bubbles clog your drain..

Call Roto-rooter, that's the name!
And away go troubles down the drain!

(though that may be SoCal local!)
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By Afix on Thursday, December 16, 1999 - 04:01 pm:

A SoCal ad I still remember from 20 years ago:

J-J-Jack, J-J-Jack, J-J-Jack, Jack-in-the-Box
Now you're cookin' now
Jack, J-J-Jack, Jack, Jack, Jack-in-the-Box
Now you're cookin' now
A Jumbo Jack, a Bonus Jack, a (Moby Jack?),a SuperScoop o'fries or have a Breakfast Jack
The Onion Ring's the natural thing
The Super Sauce is still the boss
and now you're really cookin now

Are they still playing this one?
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By ScottN on Thursday, December 16, 1999 - 07:47 pm:

Nope! I another bad one from the same era (but post blowing-up Jack)... With the Jack-in-the-box-man... Let's compare JITB with Wendys... We came up with some really disgusting sexual double meaings out of those...
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By KAM on Friday, December 17, 1999 - 12:55 am:

The Roto-Rooter commercials played up here in the Northwest as well.

A popular schoolyard rewording of the jingle was
Roto-Rooter, that's the name,
of a brand new toilet game.
Roto-Rooter
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By Lea Frost on Friday, December 17, 1999 - 02:22 am:

And we see them in Detroit, too.
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By MarkN on Friday, December 17, 1999 - 07:10 am:

Ah, the ever ubiquitous Roto-Rooter ads. Here again is a link for a good commercial site. 4Commercials.com
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By The Duke on Friday, December 17, 1999 - 01:03 pm:

The only good commercial, pilgrim, is a dead commercial.
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By Charles Cabe (Ccabe) on Friday, December 17, 1999 - 03:03 pm:

I've seen Roto-Rooter ads in Louisville and/or Evansville.
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By Brian Webber on Friday, December 17, 1999 - 03:08 pm:

Roto-rooter ads run in Denver.
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By James on Saturday, December 18, 1999 - 01:56 am:

Hey, I remember the Bonus Jack, it was a Big Mac , back when Jack-in-the-box was a mcDonald's clone..even down to the toy charechters, except for the onion Ring Thing, Micky D's still has no onion rings. lol
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By Andy Rooney on Saturday, December 18, 1999 - 10:15 pm:

Did you ever notice that McDonald's doesn't have onion rings? Why is that?
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By Slinky Frog on Tuesday, December 21, 1999 - 10:52 pm:

Does anyone remember the words or lyrics for old slinky toy adds. I always liked those. I thought it was a nice catchy tune to it.
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By margie on Wednesday, December 22, 1999 - 07:54 am:

It's something like:

"It falls down stairs, alone or in pairs, and makes a slinkety sound.

A spring, a spring, a marvelous spring, and everyone knows it's Slinky.

It's Slinky! It's Slinky! For fun it's a wonderful toy! It's fun for a girl and a boy."

Scary how I still remember that!
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By Afix on Wednesday, December 22, 1999 - 11:37 am:

They did a parody of the Slinky song on the Ren & Stimpy show.

"What rolls down stairs alone or in pairs, rolls over your neighbor's dog?
What's great for a snack and fits on your back?
It's Log, Log, Log!

It's Log, Log, it's big, it's heavy, it's wood.
It's Log, Log, it's better than bad, it's good!
Everyone wants a log! You're gonna love it, Log!
Come on and get your log! Everyone needs a Log!"
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By Slinky Frog on Wednesday, December 22, 1999 - 11:05 pm:

Thanks Margie, I can still hear the tune in my head. Ahhhhhhh, the memories!!!
Speaking of paradies, didn't the new Volkswagon Bug did thier take on the Slinky commercial jingle? I thought that was kinda cute.
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By KAM on Thursday, December 23, 1999 - 03:56 am:

So how does Slinky Frog go down stairs?

She's Slinky, she's Slinky...
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By Slinky Frog on Thursday, December 23, 1999 - 07:58 am:

It depends on the inebriated levels of the Slinky Frog.......;-)

If the levels are high.....then she goes down like this..........thump! thump! thump! thump!thump!
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By Keith Alan Morgan, spokesman for Frosted Nits on Friday, December 31, 1999 - 06:11 am:

Hello, police?
Yes, I'd like to file a missing persons report.
Who?
The Cookie Cop & the Cookie Crook from the Cookie Crisp commercials.

Have you noticed how some of these fictional pitchman just disappear without a trace?

When Cookie Crisp started, I believe it was just the Cop & the Crook, then the dog, Chip, was added, now he's the spokesman.

French Toast Crunch had two chefs, now it's just one.

Years ago in Comics Scene magazine, I was reading an interview with the author of Cereal Killings, (a comic where where cereal spokescreatures are disappearing or being murdered) and he said his inspiration was spokescharacters like Tony, Jr., & Tusk Tusk the elephant (Cocoa Crispies) going away & replaced with others.
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By MarkN on Saturday, January 1, 2000 - 03:24 am:

Anyone remember that cereal Quisp, I think it was called, with the bigheaded alien on the box? I once got a little flying saucer toy in a box of it. I also remember the old Flintstone car toys in Cocoa and Fruity Pebbles (I preferred Cocoa Pebbles). Of course you had to assemble the cars but it was fun. They had stone-looking tires, not the cylindrical ones in the cartoons, but oh, well.
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By KAM on Saturday, January 1, 2000 - 07:45 pm:

There was also a Quake cereal and the spokesman of that and Quisp didn't get along, IIRC. I think at one point they actually revamped the look of Quake's spokeman in a commercial.
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By Matthew Patterson (Mpatterson) on Saturday, January 1, 2000 - 08:10 pm:

Quake cereal... does the cereal hunt its enemies with a railgun? Were there three different versions of it?
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By ScottN on Saturday, January 1, 2000 - 11:40 pm:

I still think Snap, Crackle and Pop were the best cereal spokespersons... I don't like the Flintstones for Pebbles cereal...
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By MarkN on Sunday, January 2, 2000 - 03:00 am:

No, Matthew. Quake was a cereal exclusive only to California. (One, two, three....) Get it? heh heh. Ok, bad pun. ("Bad pun! Bad!") Actually, I'm not sure I remember Quake at all. There was another one that was practically nothing but sugar (or is that redundant of most cereals?). It was called Kaboom and had a clown on the box.

Who remembers when records came on the back of cereal boxes? It was tough cutting them out without damaging them. Mad magazine's done the same thing but you could just cut or pull them out of the magazine but they were very flimsy.
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By MarkN on Sunday, January 2, 2000 - 05:01 am:

Boy, just when you thought cereals like Quisp went the way of bellbottoms, it's back. Oh, wait. So are bellbottoms! Well, anyway, for any of you old enough to remember these cereals and the toys that came in them, here are some sites for Quisp and other classic(?) 1970's cereals, such as Freakies. All I did was search on Yahoo for classic cereals and boy howdy did I find tons of sites for these things!

Freakie Magnet This is for collecting Freakie cereal boxes and has a Quisp parody box cover.
Topher's Breakfast Cereal Character Guide
Wacky Package Wanna-Bes Some funny stuff here but card descriptions are hard to read. At least they were on my 17" monitor.
Cereal Premiums

Well, there are many, many more links you can find on your own. I just wanted to share a few with you that I'd found.
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By Lea Frost on Thursday, January 6, 2000 - 12:21 am:

Afix, I always loved the Log song... :-)
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By D.K. Henderson on Tuesday, January 11, 2000 - 07:52 am:

Whatever happened to Fruit Brute? All the other Monster cereals are still around....
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By Afix on Tuesday, January 11, 2000 - 05:14 pm:

How about those fruit drinks (anyone recall if there was a name for the group?)

Goofy Grape (my favorite)
Jolly Olly Orange
Rootin' Tootin' Raspberry
Choo-Choo Cherry
Lefty Lemon

I think there were one or two more..........
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By ScottN on Tuesday, January 11, 2000 - 05:52 pm:

How about the Otter Pops? With "Alexander the Grape" et al.?
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By D.K. Henderson on Thursday, January 13, 2000 - 07:50 am:

I remember Jolly Olly Orange! Weren't those the old Kool-Aid flavors?
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By Afix on Thursday, January 13, 2000 - 11:19 am:

I think they were made to compete with Kool-Aid. I seem to recall the packages being much bigger than Kool-Aid's because they had sugar already in them.
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By MarkN on Sunday, January 16, 2000 - 03:00 am:

Tonight's ep of SNL had a very funny commercial parody of Monica Lewinsky's Jenny Craig ad. Molly Shannon played her, and she went around a table showing several plates that all had food done up in phallic shapes. Gee, I don't know why.
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By Afix on Monday, January 17, 2000 - 10:14 am:

I think any commercial starring Ms. L should NOT have the word "head" in it..............
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By Mike Ram on Monday, January 17, 2000 - 01:26 pm:

Why exactly is Monica L. doing commercials in the first place? She was the main person involved in a sexual suit involving the White House that almost got the president impeached and now she's a lovable author/spokeswoman/actress ?!? I just don't understand this.
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By MarkN on Tuesday, January 18, 2000 - 08:00 am:

Ask Jenny Craig. Only they, and god, for those of you who believe in him, know the real reason, and I doubt they're gonna spill the beans.
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By D.K. Henderson on Tuesday, January 18, 2000 - 08:00 am:

This is called: "Milking the public." If you've got a lot of chutzpah, you can do anything.
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By Mike Deeds on Tuesday, January 18, 2000 - 10:54 am:

Nit on the first Monica post by Mike Ram. Actually, President Clinton WAS impeached - he just was NOT removed from office by the Senate. While we are on the subject, do you know that some guy created a Monica fan page and on it he compares Monica to Xena? If anyone is interested, I will post a link.
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By Mike Ram on Tuesday, January 18, 2000 - 09:25 pm:

I thought impeachment meant removal from office?
OK this is off topic but still...
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By Dan R, on Tuesday, January 18, 2000 - 11:42 pm:

nope...impeachment..i forget what it means but he is not removed from office...
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By ScottN on Wednesday, January 19, 2000 - 12:19 am:

Impeachment is the equivalent of an indictment. If the President is impeached, the matter goes to trial, with the Senate as jury and the Chief Justice presiding. The Senate must vote to convict by a two-thirds (plus 1, I think) majority. On a side note, didn't you just love Rehnquist's spiffy robes?

Historical note: Andrew Johnson was the only other president impeached. He came within one vote of conviction. The last senator had been considered a sure vote for conviction, but he changed his mind, saying, "I will not be the man to convict the President."
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By ScottN on Wednesday, January 19, 2000 - 12:20 am:

Another historical note: Nixon resigned because he knew that not only would he be impeached, but convicted.
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By Lea Frost on Wednesday, January 19, 2000 - 01:08 am:

Scott, re your side note...

All together now: "I am the very model of a Senate trial magistrate..." :-)
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By ScottN on Wednesday, January 19, 2000 - 03:32 am:

Gilbert&Sullivan meet the modern GOP! I LOVE IT!
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By MarkN on Wednesday, January 19, 2000 - 08:22 am:

You can find some info on impeachment at Britannica.com.
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By Afix on Wednesday, January 19, 2000 - 10:31 am:

Thanks, lets keep it out of here..........
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By Lea Frost on Thursday, January 20, 2000 - 05:27 pm:

Gilbert&Sullivan meet the modern GOP! I LOVE IT!

Then here's a great quote for you:

"Government by Party! Introduce that great and glorious element--at once the bulwark and foundation of England's greatness--and all will be well! No political measures will endure, because one Party will assuredly undo all that the other Party has done; and while grouse is to be shot, and foxes worried to death, the legislative action of the country will be at a standstill. Then there will be sickness in plenty, endless lawsuits, crowded jails, interminable confusion in the Army and Navy, and, in short, general and unexampled prosperity!"
-- Princess Zara's solution to the problem of over-prosperity, Utopia, Limited
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By Nawdle on Thursday, January 27, 2000 - 09:21 pm:

KAM, I dug out an old Iron Man comic from 1984 (#183 if you want to know.)with an ad for Cookie Crisp,and the spokeschacter back then was a Wizard with a blue robe and a red wizards' cap that had cookies printed on it.

So it was a Wizard,then the Cop & the Crook,then the dog Chip was added,now just Chip. These are all the ones I know.
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By Keith Alan Morgan on Friday, January 28, 2000 - 03:38 am:

Thanks Nawdle.

At Topher's Cereal Character Guide that MarkN posted above, I found out that it was actually 3 chefs for French Toast Crunch insted of the 2 I remembered.

Speaking of Comics what about those cheesy ads with the superhero's either recovering stolen Twinkies or fruit pies, or stopping the bad guys with them?

"The Joker doesn't like Twinkies? He must be insane."

The pain! The pain! All the repressed memories of those awful things are coming back. Aaaaah! ;-) ;-) ;-)

In comics from the '60's a model maker (AMT?) would have an ad accompanied by a little cartoon that gave you tips on how to do different things with your model building.
Such as, cut out a circle of clear pastic and put it on your airplane in place of the propellor blade to give the illusion of a spinning propellor.

One of my oldest comics has a one page ad for Captain Action & Action Boy figures. Done in a comic book adventure style, of course. Forgot the name of the villain.

There was also an ad for Corgi minature cars, but I believe the ad was The Adventures of Corgi Boy and it featured pictures of some of the adventures CB had had. Don't know if they were advertising a playset or if they were simply talking about how your imagination could create these things.
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By MarkN on Friday, January 28, 2000 - 07:22 am:

When I was a kid and got to visit a toystore sometimes when we got down that way (in the small city I now live in, btw), I'd practically drool over the diecast Corgi Enterprise and Space:1999 Eagle toys they had in the glass display case. At the time they cost about $15, if memory serves. Man, I've always wanted one of each of those. The Enterprise shot plastic discs out of the front of its saucer section and the bottom of the engineering section had bombbay doors for the little plastic shuttlecraft, again, if memory serves. The Eagles reminded me of those skinny helicopters with the landing gear way out to here and the wasp waists that carry transport, logs, and such. The Eagles carried either a passenger or cargo nodule and/or a string on a hook and pulley system, if once again memory serves.

I found some neat ST stuff at StarTrekToys.com, but not quite what I'm looking for. Click on the Frames version.
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By Matt Pesti on Sunday, January 30, 2000 - 05:33 pm:

Ah, Cereal Spokescreatures. All Hail King Vitamen.

Why is Coco on Coco Krispies? Can't SCP where brown?

Anyone else thing "Tony's evoled into "Tonychu" during the electric stripes

Monica proved women don't have to be Ally thin to bring a presidency to it's knees? Why would this be a good thing for Jenny Craige, which thrives on exploding peoples insecurities?
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By MarkN on Monday, January 31, 2000 - 03:51 am:

Monica was the one that got down on her knees, not the presidency. *S* And I think you meant Jenny Craig thrives on exploiting people's (read women's, mostly) insecurities, which is totally true, not that they'd admit that, of course.
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By Keith Alan Morgan on Monday, January 31, 2000 - 08:48 am:

The Captain Action villain was Dr. Evil. (He bore no resemblance to Mike Myers.)
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By Keith Alan Morgan on Wednesday, February 9, 2000 - 02:19 am:

Well, it finally happened. A commercial on channel 22 advertised the 10 o'clock news on channel 13.

It's not completely unprecedented. Channel 16 would advertise stuff on channel 5 & vice versa, but KING & KONG are sister stations, so you'd expect that. However, while 22 & 13 had some kind of deal involving the syndicated show Earth: Final Conflict, I wasn't aware of any of ties between the two stations. (22 is the WB affiliate, 13 is Fox.)
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By KAM on Monday, March 6, 2000 - 01:10 am:

Anyone else want to see that annoying Pets.com puppet dog get beaten up by Triumph, the insult comic dog?

(Triumph is a puppet from Conan O'Brien's show.)

If you neuter a puppet dog, does the puppeteer lose a thumb?
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By ScottN on Monday, March 6, 2000 - 02:31 am:

I just want that annoying Pepsi kid to go away.
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By margie on Monday, March 6, 2000 - 08:02 am:

>Anyone else want to see that annoying Pets.com puppet dog get beaten up by Triumph, the insult comic dog?

Actually, I LIKE the pets.com puppet!

>If you neuter a puppet dog, does the puppeteer lose a thumb?

After that last note in the song he sings, I thought he was already neutered!
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By KAM on Friday, May 5, 2000 - 03:21 am:

Ladies and Gentleman!

The Pets.com puppet dog vs. Triumph, the Insult Comic puppet dog.

Go for the wrist, Triumph!!! Go for the wrist! Make that annoying puppet dog your b..., um, beg for mercy.

I hope Pets.com loses the court case.
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By TWS Garrison on Monday, June 19, 2000 - 05:23 am:

Well, it finally happened. A commercial on channel 22 advertised the 10 o'clock news on channel 13.
It's not completely unprecedented. Channel 16 would advertise stuff on channel 5 & vice versa, but KING & KONG are sister stations, so you'd expect that. However, while 22 & 13 had some kind of deal involving the syndicated show Earth: Final Conflict, I wasn't aware of any of ties between the two stations. (22 is the WB affiliate, 13 is Fox.)

Additionally, for at least the last week I've been noticing that The Station Which Was Actually Worth Watching For Something Other Than Star Trek Reruns When It Was The Northwest's Own Movie Channel has been airing commercials for 22's TNG syndication during its VOY syndication. There's something going on there. . .
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By Keith Alan Morgan (Kmorgan) on Monday, June 19, 2000 - 08:27 pm:

Yep. 22 runs NextGen & DS9 during the week, while 13 runs them on the weekends.
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By KAM on Tuesday, July 4, 2000 - 03:04 am:

A new MiSTing, when the George commercial comes on and he mentions that when people see the new golden dollar & ask, "Where's George?"
[as George] Here I am! On the misprinted coins! Muhahahaha!

By Keith Alan Morgan on Wednesday, February 16, 2000 - 03:16 am:

The Pepsi One commercial on the boat, has some very thirsty people. They take a sip set the cans down, then a second or two passes & they pick up the cans and take another drink & so on & so on. If you're that thirsty, why put down the can at all?

The Jamie Lee Curtis cell phone commercial with the British guy talking about "mud & mud & more mud". Next time it's on, at the end when she's made her escape and the phone rings and she says "Hello?"
Imitate the guy and say, "Mud & mud & more mud". (It amuses me to do that, anyway.)
Actually it just sounds to me like the guy is describing a rock trip. ;-)
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By KAM on Saturday, February 19, 2000 - 04:18 pm:

The commercial for this morning's Marvel Avengers cartoon, said that the Earth would be torn apart by a "weapon of mass destruction". I should hope so. I would hate to think that the Earth could be torn apart by the prize in a box of Cracker Jacks.
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By Keith Alan Morgan on Monday, March 6, 2000 - 12:54 am:

The promo for the TV Guide Awards said it was sponsered by Excedrin, the headache medicine. Everyone in the room cracked up.
How appropriate that another d... darn awards show is sponsered by an aspirin company. Once during one of those annoying, so-called comedy bits I said, "Excedrin?" and got a laugh.
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By Aaron Dotter on Thursday, March 23, 2000 - 11:10 pm:

I saw the man who played Admiral Ross (Is Barry Jenner his name?)in an American Airlines commercial. I said to myself,"Why doesn't he just use the transporter?"
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By Dan R. on Friday, March 24, 2000 - 12:22 am:

Anyone see the commercials with "George Washington" talking about the new golden dollar? They have it on TV and radio...in the TV commercial he uses it on a soda machine, and in the radio commercial he says you can use it in a dollar bill machine....sorry not true. Most if not all vending machines will not take: golden dollars, old dollar pieces and 50 cent pieces. At the old gas station I worked I emptied the money out of our vending machines...it only took nickels, dimes and quarters...and these were the most recent machines available. (anyone seen the coke machine with the wavy design where the front is all wavy and not flat like other machines?)
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By Keith Alan Morgan on Friday, April 7, 2000 - 04:10 am:

The Census commercial showing the school says, that you can do something to help with overcrowding in schools. Yeah. Stop having kids!
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By Al Fix on Friday, April 7, 2000 - 11:04 am:

A new one I've only heard whiile the TV's on, but not actually watched. (Maybe this should go in Worst Commercials).

A woman's concerned voice begins by saying "What is a meal to a child?". Naturally, I thought it was one of those infomercials for Feed the Children or some such. But the next line is given in a smarmy manner -- "Something you have to eat, to get DESSERT!" It's a commercial for some dessert treat, of course. I just thought it was reprehensible to give the impression that all kids are saying "AWWWW! I have to eat AGAIN?" when there are many that don't have enough.
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By SomeDude on Saturday, April 8, 2000 - 12:38 am:

Al Fix- Actually It's A Commercial For Arby's...
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By Keith Alan Morgan on Saturday, April 8, 2000 - 04:35 am:

Speaking of confusing commercials, the one that starts off with the fancy, but insubstantial meal, then they show a steak being slapped on a grill. Makes one think it's a beef commercial, but no, they flip the steak over and it has a car logo on it. It's really a car commercial.
What drugs were the writers on when they came up with that idea?

There's a commercial for Foster Farms Chicken (Grown in Washington) which has two chickens (puppets) trying to become Foster Farms Chickens. Why? Do they have a death wish?

At least two commercials have featured a gorgeous babe staring at a guy's beer. There's a word for that... Alcholic!

A Jack In The Box commercial has Jack and some guy arguing over what the commercial should show. Jack thinks the shot of the food is enough while the guy thinks it should have something behind it.
As an artist I can't see Jack's argument. The food was shot at an angle and only fills the bottom third of the screen. It you wanted a commercial showing the food you put the camera above the food and have it take up the whole screen.
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By Mike Ram on Monday, April 10, 2000 - 01:29 am:

I like that new jeans commercial with the fine chick flashing a train. Nice. ~_-
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By ScottN on Monday, April 10, 2000 - 01:05 pm:

The William Shatner Priceline.com horror continues... This morning I heard him mangling "Free as a Bird".

Someone, please, MAKE IT STOP!
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By ScottN on Monday, April 10, 2000 - 01:07 pm:

I know the girl in the "Nicole" Michelob commercial isn't Nicole deBoer, though she looks like her. It also looks kind of like Hilary Swank. Anyone know if that's her? You know the commercial... "Nicole, get a Michelob and meet me in the living room..."
(she shows up in a sexy nightie and its her surprise party) "Oh... Hi, Daddy..."
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By Aaron Dotter on Monday, April 10, 2000 - 05:55 pm:

How come these Census ads don't mention Congressional representation- that's why we do them in the first place! I care a lot more about that then some of these other things they talk about, especially when my state might lose a seat(OK, I might just care too much about politics, but it is important!)
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By Todd Pence on Wednesday, April 12, 2000 - 11:21 pm:

Hey, ScottN, you haven't lived till you've heard Shatner's version of "Mr. Tamborine Man" or "Lucy in the Sky with Diamonds" . . .
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By ScottN on Thursday, April 13, 2000 - 06:49 pm:

I've heard about his album... I can just picture it...

Lucy.... inthesky.... with..... diamonds....

or maybe

Hey... Mr.... tambourineman.... play.... asong... forme!
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By MarkN on Sunday, April 16, 2000 - 04:42 am:

I just saw a new Target ad with Charlotte Church singing Easter Bonnet. She's holding one egg that she's painted, and when she gets to the two words "Easter Parade", nothing happens. So she tries again and the egg slightly cracks. So she tries again, higher, the egg breaks more and out pops a green chick! Cute. She's only 14 and already she's sold out! UGH! What's next?
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By Lucifer S. Beelzebub on Sunday, April 16, 2000 - 10:10 am:

What's wrong with selling out?
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By KAM on Friday, May 5, 2000 - 03:15 am:

The Ask Jeeves commercials all feature someone asking Jeeves a question & he gives them an exact answer. Not quite the way the actual website works. Ask it a question and it gives you a list of websites that might contain an answer.

The Griffey commercial for Sportz(?) crackers. It came out just after Griffey was traded to Cincinatti, but it looked like Griffey was wearing a Mariners uniform. Unless you took a closer look and notice that the outfit doesn't seem to have any team designation at all. Obviously filmed during the discussions to make a trade.
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By Matt Pesti on Tuesday, May 9, 2000 - 10:12 pm:

Advertising the Census like that is a "Easy money, at the taking. Win the lottery!" Appropiate since these Census adverts are targeted to the poor where lottery tickets are also targeted. Even though you can get more money from a verteran congressman with good pork connections than a good Census readout.
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By Nathan K. on Tuesday, May 9, 2000 - 11:26 pm:

Well, actually, a lot of commercials featuring professional sports use uniforms that look almost like specific teams, but not quite. That way, they only have to pay the player and not the team.
There was one of those investment commercials recently that had Shannon Sharpe of the Denver Broncos trash-talking Jason Sehorn of the New York Giants for not having a diverse investment portfolio, and stuff like that.

If you looked carefully at the helmets, you could see that the Broncos symbol was replaced by an arrow, and the Giants helmet just said "New York." Also, the color scheme on both uniforms was much simpler.
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By Spornan on Wednesday, May 10, 2000 - 06:07 pm:

There's a commercial with Joe Torre, where he is supposed to be sitting in the Yankee dugout. His cap however, is just a blue cap, with no NY symbol on it.
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By Keith Alan Morgan on Tuesday, May 16, 2000 - 12:44 am:

The Seattle Mariners have a cute commercial. We see a couple of Mariners, in uniform, doing yardwork. The guy mowing the lawn stops, tired. The manager comes over and has him hit the showers, then brings in another guy to finish mowing the lawn.
Cute.

By ScottN on Tuesday, May 16, 2000 - 11:33 am:

Totally irrelevant, but on the baseball topic...

Tommy Lasorda has been named manager of the US Olympic Baseball team. Good move! I dislike the Dodgers (having had a sister who bled blue), but Lasorda is probably the best choice to promote the sport across the world...
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By Cornpone on Wednesday, May 17, 2000 - 11:29 am:

Does anyone understand the Visa Check Card commercial with Jason Alexander (from "Seinfeld')? It starts with him and a woman seemingly at the end of a date and they are exchanging good-byes. Exact dialogue is something like: "I had fun." (both) "So, I'll call you" (him) "OK" (her) "Bye" (both). Then, he says "Hey" and tells her that next time he will bring enough cash for both of them. He then goes to the movie ticket booth and buys tickets (two?). My questions: Were they are on a date and she paid for dinner (or something) because he told her he didn't have any cash on him? Why not use his card to pay for the movie tickets for both of them (since it looks like he bought two)? I just don't "get" this commercial. What is the joke? Am I missing something?
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By ScottN on Tuesday, May 23, 2000 - 04:16 am:

Avery Brooks is doing IBM commercials.
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By MarkN on Wednesday, May 24, 2000 - 05:58 am:

Yeah, Scott. I just saw part of one the other day. Incidently, I own 2 Aptivas but I think my next puter'll be a different brand, possibly even a Mac. Does anyone know if HP's are any good? I like their CD-RW features but I'm in no hurry to get another puter at the moment. Ok, that's all, since it's off-topic, too.
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By Mike Ram on Thursday, May 25, 2000 - 01:38 am:

Those new Stacker2 commercials are hilarious. In one, a cop stops behind a guy in a shaking car. It turns out the guy is just reaching for a cupcake. In the other, a fat guy sings a corny song while trying to hit on a girl washing a car.
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By Keith Alan Morgan on Thursday, May 25, 2000 - 05:12 am:

A commercial for US West Dex has two Scottish women talking about Haggis. One of them says, "You can't get Real Haggis here."
Does that mean that they can get Fake Haggis here?

A cute ending though as the two women walk outside and one comments that 'They could do with a bit of rain.' As we all know it doesn't rain enough in Western Washington. ;-)
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By Trekker on Thursday, June 29, 2000 - 09:57 pm:

What about that one with Burger King that has the chickens from Chicken Run and says something like "come here so you don't have to eat chickens"? Well, you're eating beef, aren't you? Are you saying chickens are higher than cows? I don't understand that one.
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By Some Other Dude on Thursday, June 29, 2000 - 11:14 pm:

Duh... the chickens don't want you to eat *CHICKEN*. It's a JOKE!
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By Tom Kun on Thursday, June 29, 2000 - 11:14 pm:

I wonder what the cows from the Chick-Fil-A commercials have to say about those new Burger King ads.
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By Keith Alan Morgan (Kmorgan) on Thursday, June 29, 2000 - 11:44 pm:

There's also a commercial, that has a lobster trying to convince the viewers to eat steak instead of lobster. (Don't remember what restaurant the commercial is for, though.)

Trekker, your comment about chickens being higher than cows is interesting as there are some vegetarians who believe it is okay to eat chicken. (I didn't realize poultry were vegetables.)

Anyone else disappointed that the Black Angus commercials are trying to domesticate their psycho cowboy?
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By afix on Friday, June 30, 2000 - 12:39 pm:

I'm just wondering how BK's current campaign will affect the sales of their chicken sandwiches and tenders.

And Black Angus is doing the same thing that all Star Trek shows have done since TNG... That is, turn the bad guys into puppies.
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By Keith Alan Morgan (Kmorgan) on Saturday, July 1, 2000 - 01:01 am:

I didn't say the psycho cowboy (Travis) was a bad guy, just psycho.

Some of the earlier commercials featured the guy outgrowling a bear, or grabbing a hot coffee pot and laughing, and the little animated section at the end of one featured him swatting a fly on his head with a frying pan. The guy just wasn't right, and it was funny.

Now however they've had this Abby woman in 2 commercials, so far, and it seems like they're trying to sane the guy up.

(Nothing against the actress, she looks fine, but the spots aren't as funny.)
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By Jon Wade on Saturday, July 1, 2000 - 08:09 pm:

With the Pepsi One commercial on the boat... the blonde woman the guy is sitting next to... is that Jennifer Lien?
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By Keith Alan Morgan (Kmorgan) on Sunday, July 2, 2000 - 01:59 am:

I don't think so, but now that you mention it, there are similarities.
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By Charles Cabe (Ccabe) on Sunday, July 2, 2000 - 02:58 pm:

I think tha Jennifer Lien has longer hair than Kes in real life. I don't think the Pepsi people would have wasted money on a wig.
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By dhull on Monday, July 3, 2000 - 04:30 pm:

Actually, about the Burger King commercials, I think they're making a classic restaurant blunder. They are deliberately pointing out where meat comes from -- dead animals.
Now I know we all are aware of that, but it isn't in the front of our minds when we're ordering food.

How many of us would be able to work a day in a slaughterhouse and then head out for a burger?

Probably the biggest mistake they're making is that the commercial is kid-oriented with the characters they're using. I shudder to think about how many parents will have to answer the questions, "Daddy, do they really kill those cute chickens to make my McNuggets?"
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By dhull on Monday, July 3, 2000 - 04:31 pm:

By the way, for the best in recent commercials, visit www.adcritic.com. They update their video files daily!
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By KAM on Tuesday, July 4, 2000 - 02:26 am:

"Daddy, do they really kill those cute chickens to make my McNuggets?"

"No, dear. They kill the ugly ones."
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By Matthew Patterson (Mpatterson) on Tuesday, July 4, 2000 - 02:27 am:

Bad KAM, bad!

Funny, but bad!
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By Farmer Bob on Wednesday, July 5, 2000 - 01:28 am:

I grew up on a farm an occasionally ate the chickens that we had killed earlier that day for dinner. No big deal. I guess its just in your point of view.
BTW I would never consider pigs,chickens or cattle as anything other than potentional dinner. Never a pet.

A radio commercial for Wendy's talks about 9 being in every year for a 100 years (1900-1999), then along comes 2000 and 9 is out. Actually, 9 has been in every year for 111 years, 1889-1999.

And why isn't this doofus feeling sorry about 1? 1 has been in every year for 1000 years (1000-1999).

Oh who cares about 1!!! It's 2's turn now!

Yes, I really need the rest.

Why next year I plan to... D'oh!

I have to work next year!

Razzenfrazzen, mumble, grumble...

Hey, at least you *GET* a rest. I got 1000 years of work ahead of me with no break!

I believe "1" is none other than KAM! He has also used the phrase "Razzenfrazzen, mumble, grumble..."

As have various Hanna-Barbera characters.

Black Angus has replaced their psycho cowboy. The actress playing Abby is the same, but Travis is a different actor.

A truly annoying commercial states, "It's a rule of Physics, the guy with the cold will sit next to you." I believe that's a variation on Murphy's Law & has nothing to do with Physics.

I recently saw a beer commercial where a bear was looking over a cooler of beer, and these two camping guys couldn't get their beer. One of the guys solution is he sprays honey all over his friend and the bear chases after him. Let me ask you something, have you ever squeezed honey out of a container, it can't spray like it did in this commercial.

The Disney California commercial has Buzz comment on a Limo and 3 princesses (Jasmine, Sleeping Beauty(?) & Belle) say, "Is there a Prince?"

Ummm, aren't these ladies already married? Does Happily Ever After mean nothing anymore? Or do they have an arrangement with their spouses? He gets the occassional intern, she gets the next prince?

Actually, I don't think we ever see any of them get married!

Yes, we specifically see Jasmine get married in "Aladdin and the King of Thieves".

Oh, okay. Didn't see that one yet. Sorry!

It's Cinderella, not Sleeping Beauty, in the commercial.

A recent commercial has a truck & boat go into the water, above the cab of the truck. A guy in a more powerful truck pulls the truck & boat out. However, if you look at the clothes of the powerful truck driver, and the guy & gal who own the truck & boat that sank, none of their clothes are wet, but in order to hook up the towrope someone had to go into the water & tie the rope to the sunk truck.

Another commercial for some kind of pet product has a woman say something like, "I hear that the liquid drops can leave a toxic residue around the house." Not "tests have shown", not "Doctors say", but "I hear".
Well, I hear that there are people living on Mars hiding from Earth telescopes & probes. Does that make it true?

He discovered our secret, K-9. he makes me so angry! Now I shall have to destroy the earth. Where is my space modulator?

Nyaah, you mean dis Eluduim Q-36 explosive space modulat-or?

Hi! I'm a 30-second Eludium Q-36 Exploding Space Modulat-or!
Hi! I'm a 29-second Eludium Q-36 Exploding Space Modulat-or!
Hi! I'm a 28-second Eludium Q-36 Exploding Space Modulat-or!

etc., etc.

Hi! I'm a 1-second Eludium Q-36 Exploding Space Modulat-or!
BOOOOOOOM!!!