This is a joke emailed to me by Union City Commissioner Lucio Fernandez, which I tweaked slightly:

A young man named John received a parrot as a gift. The parrot had a bad attitude and an even worse vocabulary.

Every word out of the bird's mouth was rude, obnoxious and laced with profanity. John tried and tried to change the bird's attitude by consistently saying only polite words, playing soft music and anything else he could think of to 'clean up' the bird's vocabulary. He even took it to a trainer, in the hopes of showing off his newly eloquent pet on Thanksgiving, when his family would come over for dinner.

Unfortunately, none of this worked, and the parrot's behavior continued. Eventually, John got fed up and he yelled at the parrot. The parrot yelled back. John shook the parrot and the parrot got angrier and even more rude. John, in desperation, grabbed the bird and put him in the freezer. For a few minutes the parrot squawked and kicked and screamed. Then suddenly there was total quiet. Not a peep was heard for over a minute.

Fearing that he'd hurt the parrot, John quickly opened the door to the freezer. The parrot calmly stepped out onto John's outstretched arms and shaking, said, "I believe I may have offended you with my rude language and actions. I'm sincerely remorseful for my inappropriate transgressions and I fully intend to do everything I can to correct my rude and unforgivable behavior."

John was stunned at the change in the bird's attitude, but before he could ask the parrot what had caused such a dramatic change in his behavior, the bird spoke up, asking, "May I ask what the turkey did?"

Happy Thanksgiving, everyone!

Sometimes internet domains have unfortunate implications.

http://www.inhumandecency.org/christine/cv.html

How many of you read that as "inhuman decency"? It's the website of a religious academic scholar, so I think it was meant to be "in human decency."
Probably.

I'm sure you've heard of other unfortunate domain names.

Wall Street was closed today because of Hurricane Sandy.

In related news, crime was down by 90%.

Pardon me... *FINANCIAL* crimes.

Which accounts for most of the monetary aspect of robberies. :-)

Sometimes internet domains have unfortunate implications.
Apparently they haven't discovered hyphens and underscores yet.

The site Experts Exchange had to change their domain name to include a hyphen. It used to be:

expertsexchange.com