Transcript

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Nitcentral's Bulletin Brash Reflections: Stargate - SG-1, Atlantis, etc: SciFi Channel documentaries: SciFi Inside - Stargate’s 200th Episode: Transcript

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SCI FI INSIDE: STARGATE’S 200TH EPISODE

Transcript by Callie Sullivan.

Transcriber’s notes: I have not transcribed every single ‘uh’ and ‘um’, and have tried to make sensible sentences where the speaker lost his/her way a bit.
Frequently throughout the show, clips of various episodes were shown. I have not transcribed those unless they are relevant to what’s being said by someone at the time. There were also extracts from previous “Sci Fi Inside” documentaries. I have not repeated all of them here.
Please remember that some of the comments made by various people may look serious in plain print but were, in fact, meant sarcastically or humorously.


MGM’s Bridge Studios. Gary Jones (Chief Master Sergeant Walter Harriman), dressed in his green overalls, walks briskly and determinedly across the lot. He enters a building and goes in. Trotting up some stairs, he pauses for breath for a moment, then continues and goes into an office. He walks over to a woman sitting behind a desk.
GARY JONES: Hey, Tanya.
TANYA: Oh, hey, Gary.
GARY JONES: Hey. Any idea whether or not I’m in the two hundredth episode?
TANYA: I don’t know, Gary. You’ll have to check with the back hall – Brad and Robert down there.
GARY JONES: Those guys are totally scary. I don’t wanna talk to them.
(Nevertheless, he walks down the hall, pauses outside an office, braces himself for a moment, then taps his hand on the glass beside the open door while sticking his head inside the office.)
GARY JONES: Hey, uh ... hey, Rob? Robert? Mr Cooper?
(Robert C Cooper, Executive Producer, is sitting behind his desk.)
ROBERT COOPER: Yeah.
(Gary walks into the office nervously.)
GARY JONES: OK, um, Rob, listen: do you have any idea ... am I gonna be in this episode or not? Do you ... do you know? I, you know ... I, you know ... I wasn’t in the hundredth episode, which ...
(Rob picks up the phone and presses a button.)
ROBERT COOPER: Hi. Did ... did you let Gary in here? ... Alright, yeah. Next time, don’t. Definitely.
GARY JONES (backing away while holding up a placating hand): Yeah, it’s OK. That’s OK. It’s OK, you’re busy, you’re busy. No, no, it’s OK. It’s OK. That’s OK.
(Robert puts the phone down and waves at Gary as he leaves the office.)
ROBERT COOPER: See you, Jim.

AMANDA TAPPING: This is “Sci Fi Inside: Stargate SG-1’s 200th Episode” and we are pulling out all the stops – plus a few surprises.
RICHARD DEAN ANDERSON: Possibly, after ten years, we might share a romantic moment and O’Neill might get pregnant. That would be cool.
ROBERT COOPER: It’s almost a sketch comedy, like, you know, “Saturday Night Live.”
CHRISTOPHER JUDGE: We’re gonna take a look back at the last ten years of “SG-1” to see how hairstyles have changed, how weight has fluctuated, and how we have or haven’t gotten along. Do Teal’c and Daniel finally kiss?
(Michael Shanks gets out of a chair, puts his face close to the camera and kisses the screen.)
CHRISTOPHER JUDGE: No. (He laughs.)
MICHAEL SHANKS: We’re gonna show you the best bad guys ... the best visual effects ...
BEAU BRIDGES: And you’re gonna find out it’s not all about just going around killing aliens. [There’s] gotta be some laughs.
AMANDA TAPPING: Ten years. Two hundred episodes. One show. “Stargate SG-1.”

(Clip from “200.” SG-1 are standing in front of the Stargate as it dials out.)
MITCHELL: Yeah, this is gonna be huge. The big two-oh-oh.
(The Gate fritzes and shuts down. The team turns to look into the Control Room. The technician holds out his hands and shrugs.)

CLAUDIA BLACK: Hi, I’m Claudia Black, and you’re watching “Sci Fi Inside: Stargate SG-1’s 200th Episode.”

(Gary Jones walks into the Craft Services area and goes over to a man.)
GARY JONES: Hey, Glen.
GLEN MOWATT (Craft Services Guy): Yeah.
GARY JONES: Have you heard whether or not I’m on the two hundredth episode? I-I-I ... nobody seems to know. I’m trying to find out.
GLEN MOWATT: Are you kiddin’, man? I’m not in the loop. I’m Craft Services. I’m just ... (He looks down at what Gary’s holding.) Are you working today?
GARY JONES (lifting up the cookie he’s holding): Well, not technically, but ...
GLEN MOWATT (taking the cookie off him): Well, can you put that back? We’ve got a lot of people here to feed.
GARY JONES: Yeah. Yeah, OK. No, I understand. (He walks away, whispering to himself.) Oh, my God.

AMANDA TAPPING: Not a lot of shows last ten years and two hundred episodes. Lucky for me, “Stargate SG-1” is one of them. This doesn’t feel like the two hundredth episode. In some ways, it ... it still feels really new. In other ways, it feels like (she rolls her eyes wearily), “Oh, two hundred!” (She crosses her eyes.) But for the most part, it still, like, it doesn’t feel like ten years have gone by. I can’t even fathom that a decade of my life has gone by. When I auditioned, I auditioned in Toronto. I got the sides for the audition. I went, “Wow, this is a cool character.” All the Sam Carters, all the Teal’cs, all the Daniels, all the Hammonds were all hanging out together, which is surreal, to have all these actors at a final callback, kinda staring each other down. But Chris and Michael and I actually hit it off at that audition and started talking and hanging out. And Michael waited for me to finish, and we took a cab back to the hotel together. And I just very distinctly remember giving ... you know, we gave each other a hug and said, “Well, good luck. Good luck. Hopefully I’ll see you in Vancouver.” And then finding out, “Oh, they’ve cast Daniel. Who got it? Who got it?” “Michael Shanks.” “Right on! He was great! Oh, cool! Hope I get it! Hope I get it!”

BRAD WRIGHT (Executive Producer): When I saw Amanda’s audition, I thought, “That’s her.” When we saw Teal’c come in, I said, “That’s Teal’c.”
ROBERT COOPER (sitting with Brad): Strangely enough, he was named ‘Teal’c’.
BRAD WRIGHT (laughing): Yeah, yeah, yeah!

CHRISTOPHER JUDGE: There were three Daniel Jacksons, three Sam Carters, three General Hammonds, and ten Teal’cs. And the ten Teal’cs looked like the Rainbow Coalition. There was an Asian guy, there was kind of a Spanish guy, there was, uh, all ... just a ... just a, uh, a mixed bag of Teal’cs. They kept calling names, and I kept seeing Teal’cs leave. So we got down to two Daniel Jacksons, two Carters, and two General Hammonds. And I looked around, and I was the only Teal’c.
BRAD WRIGHT: There were three pretty strong candidates for the character of Daniel, and one of them was Michael Shanks. But he was so young. He was really young, and in person he was even younger. He was, like, twenty-four years old or something when he started – Doctor Daniel Jackson, with nine PhDs and speaks seventy-four languages. So he comes in and he was very nervous. He was very nervous. But I still felt he was Daniel. We go a whole ... all the way around the room. Everybody said, “The other guy,” “The other guy,” “The other guy,” “The other guy,” and they came to me, and I said, “It’s Shanks. Sorry, guys.” And, boy, it was a good thing we went with a twenty-five year old guy because we went ten years! Now he’s perfect!
MICHAEL SHANKS: Uh, well, the character came really easy ‘cause I just ripped off James Spader’s role – um, just ripped off all of his mannerisms and acting, and they ... they liked that. And then, all of the sudden, they said, “And now do it for ten years,” and I went ... (he cringes) “Oh, yeah, that’s great(!) Paint yourself into that corner!” So I knew I had to kind of evolve the character from that original form. And I’ve had Plenty O’ Time to do it. When the fans of the show come up, they say, “Man, I like your version better than James Spader’s version of it,” I go, “Well, I’ve had a little more time with it, thank God.” I’d hate to see if they still liked his version over mine, and they were still watching, boy, oh, boy. I ... I don’t think I’ve got another hundred episodes to really make them happy.

RICHARD DEAN ANDERSON: The misbehaving factor there is necessary for me. It’s like, I come in ... into an environment, and the only demand I make of a set and of a crew and the people that I work with is a sense of humour. It was just right. I mean, every ... you know, there’s nothing about the personalities of ... of ... what are their names?

BEN BROWDER: Yeah, the cast is a lot of fun to be around. You spend any time around ‘em, you get the sense of how much fun we have while we’re at work. And beyond that, it’s just great to be working. (He laughs heartily.) Actors, you know, we’re a dime a dozen. We come, we go. And I’m ... I’m very privileged to be a part of this show.

ROBERT COOPER: You know, Ben and Claudia have been great new additions. And it’s funny, because the old cast, the new cast, all came together and gelled so quickly. It never really felt like a Season one. It felt like the whole thing just kept going. And, uh, it was a great experience, and I think the audience obviously responded to it, ‘cause we’re still here.

BEAU BRIDGES: Yeah, I think it’s remarkable that, uh, they’re celebrating their two hundredth. I mean, that’s an incredible accomplishment. For me to be a part of it’s like, uh, you know, jumping on a running train, you know. But everyone has been very gracious, welcoming me to the cast, and, uh, making me feel a part of it. So I have no complaints. This is my second year. And, uh, in the two hundredth, I get to play the Wizard of Oz, so, you know, what more can a man ask?

CLAUDIA BLACK: I feel like I’m just coming along for the ride on this two hundredth episode. It’s, um, an amazing achievement for everybody who’s been here from the beginning ...

(On the set for “200,” Claudia and Amanda are standing in the Briefing Room with their arms around each other.)
CLAUDIA BLACK (to the camera): Now we will kiss ...
(Amanda blows a smoochy kiss at the camera.)
CLAUDIA BLACK: ... in a really hot, saucy way.

CLAUDIA BLACK: ... and it’s fun to be here and help everyone celebrate.
AMANDA TAPPING: It’s crazy. It’s hilarious. We ... we riff on “Wizard of Oz.” We just ... all of the stuff that we’ve played with. The perfect way to do it is to introduce this movie and have Willie Garson’s character come back and to play out all of our fantasies. “What if we did this in the movie?”

BEN BROWDER: Doing sci-fi’s fantastic. You know, you get to play and do things that you wouldn’t get to do on a cop show or a lawyer show or a doctor show. Yeah, you just go out, you blow up a planet, you kiss the alien babe. It’s ... it’s all good.

DAVID HEWLETT: Hello, my name is David Hewlett – Rodney McKay on “Stargate SG-1” and “Stargate: Atlantis.” And I just wanted to thank “SG-1” for putting me in three of those two hundred episodes that they made, and, of course, causing my meteoric rise to fame and fortune. (He gives a thumbs-up.) Good luck, kids. I just wanna say thanks to the little guys who got me there.

(Out on the lot, Gary Jones trots over to a trailer with “A.D.” on the door, goes up the steps and knocks on the door. Without waiting for a reply, he opens the door.)
GARY JONES: Steve?
(When there’s no reply, he looks around to see if anyone’s watching, goes inside and starts rummaging through some papers on a table just inside the door. Just then, Steve Catlin (3rd Assistant Director) comes over to the trailer, wearing headphones and a microphone.)
STEVE CATLIN: Hey, Gary.
GARY JONES (rapidly putting the papers down again): Hey, Steve.
STEVE CATLIN: What’s going on?
GARY JONES: Uh, just, uh ... am I on this episode? Do you know? I’ve just ... just trying to find my name.
STEVE CATLIN: Well ... (He picks up the papers that Gary just put down.)
GARY JONES: Am I ... do you know if I’m on this episode? I-I ...
STEVE CATLIN: Let’s have a look.
GARY JONES: ... I gotta know.
STEVE CATLIN (looking through the papers): Well, you’re usually number ten, right?
GARY JONES: Uh, yeah.
STEVE CATLIN: It’s been, uh, whited out.
GARY JONES: Whited out?
STEVE CATLIN: But, hey, I’m really busy. I got some stuff to do. (He pushes his way into the trailer, speaking into his microphone.) Copy that.
GARY JONES: Uh, yeah, but ...
STEVE CATLIN: Thanks, Gary.
GARY JONES (walking back down the steps): Oh, OK, yeah.
STEVE CATLIN: Talk to you later. (He closes the door.)
GARY JONES: OK, yeah, OK. I ... I’ll catch you later, Steve.

CHRISTOPHER JUDGE: You know, after two hundred episodes, there’s a lot of stuff to choose from for the “best of” categories. Well, right here are some of our favourites.
(Lots of clips of various characters saying, “What?” or similar lines.)
BEN BROWDER: Mitchell has a catchphrase. And it’s, uh, “What?” That’s it. That’s pretty much it. That’s me: “What?”

TEN YEARS OF BAD GUYS.
MICHAEL SHANKS: I like the Ori. I like the fact, too, that the Ori specifically that we, uh, have encountered don’t have a face. I think that the wonderful thing about not showing the villain ... it’s like “Jaws.” The less you see of them, the more scary it is, the more it’s in your imagination. So I love the idea of the Ori being our ... our villains, and I don’t wanna see them.
AMANDA TAPPING: It’s a weird, sort of pervasive thing with the Ori because it ... I think it’s topical. I think it’s relatable to kind of what’s happening today: this sort of fundamentalist religious group that’s ruling by fear and oppression and bullying. I don’t know. I just think it’s ... it’s topical.
PETER DeLUISE (Director/Supervising Producer): We started to meet Goa’ulds – the most, uh, dastardly of which was Apophis.
AMANDA TAPPING: He was my first bad guy. (She rolls her eyes deliciously.) Mm! You never forget your first.
PETER DeLUISE: He had that – if you watch the movie he talks like this: (he puts his hands over his mouth and makes incoherent noises [he also seems to have forgotten that Apophis wasn’t in the movie!]) That’s my best imitation. Then his eyes would glow. And he’d look over his shoulder a lot. He’d go like this a lot: (he turns away from the camera, then turns and glares over his shoulder into the camera.)
CHRISTOPHER JUDGE: I think the most resilient bad guy, and kind of one of my favourites, is Ba’al. There’s not
only one Ba’al. There’s many Ba’als. He kinda has that panache, that-that flair.
CLIFF SIMON (Ba’al): He’s very, very powerful. And he’s killed a hell of a lot more people than any of the other System Lords.
CHRISTOPHER JUDGE: He’s a bad guy, but you kinda like him ‘cause he’s so arrogant and just so ... never ever plays it like he’s defeated. He can be standing there surrounded or having just been zatted or shot and he still has that great smirk on his face. I love that.
RICHARD DEAN ANDERSON: I think Hathor because of the ludicrousness of the character. And, uh, I got to sit in a tub full of jumbo shrimp and boil for half a day. And also I stole her headdress and wore it for a costume, a Hallowe’en costume one year and was just the belle of the ball. So for so many selfish reasons, I really liked Hathor. (He laughs.) My God! I can’t say it with a straight face. (He manages to get his face straight.) Hathor was my favourite.
MICHAEL SHANKS: A lotta people liked Anubis. I didn’t get Anubis. You know, he looked like an oil slick.
BEN BROWDER: I faced a semi-ascended being. I faced the Black Knight. Should you have a favourite bad guy?

FAVORITE MOMENTS.
AMANDA TAPPING (rolling her eyes, pulling a face and talking in a goofy voice): My God, my favourite moments. It’s been ten years. Jeez, how do you pick?
(Clip from “Meridian.” Sam talks to Daniel in the Infirmary.)
CARTER: You have an effect on people, Daniel. (Tearfully) I don’t know why we wait to tell people how we really feel.
AMANDA TAPPING: I just think that it’s moments where it sort of tests your mettle, like, where the writers have actually stepped up with the character. Like, stepped it up a notch and given you a new depth or a new layer or a new part of your back story that people didn’t necessarily know about. And it’s usually in moments of crisis. So we’ve had quite a few of those in ten years.
(Clips from “Nemesis” of Jack and Teal’c firing at the Replicators on Thor’s ship.)
RICHARD DEAN ANDERSON: I liked a time when Chris and I were firing these big guns, these big rifle ... Spaz-80, -90s. And something else biggish, explosive. There was another time when I got to shoot the 50-cal.
(Clip from “Allegiance” of Jack firing at the invisible Ashrak.)
RICHARD DEAN ANDERSON: That sucker that you gotta pull back and ... get a [censored] by doing this thing with, you know. It kept jamming on me, so I had, like, bloody fingers and I didn’t care. I just kept pullin’ back and firing away. Yeah, it was all very kind of sickly sexual in a bad way to be shooting those big guns ...
(Various other clips of Jack gunning down bad guys.)
RICHARD DEAN ANDERSON: ... ‘cause I hate ‘em in real life, but, man, when they’re not shooting with live ammo, it’s ... it’s quite a hoot.
BEN BROWDER: I still like the moment Vala came first through the Gate. (He laughs, then looks dopey, mimicking Cameron’s reaction to her.) Huh?
CLAUDIA BLACK: The outfit [that she wore in “Avalon”] was so extraordinary and I felt fantastic wearing it. And, uh,
and for some reason, we were always filming sort of shots here. (She gestures to her upper body.) That was the frame. I-I don’t know why. Had something to do with the bustier, I’m thinking.
MICHAEL SHANKS: Last year, we did an episode arc called “Avalon 1 and 2” and “Origin.” And in that, Claudia’s and my character take great delight in laying into one another and slagging each other off and calling each other names and finding different ways to dig on each other. There’s a lot of antagonism throughout it. And then there’s this horrific sequence that we shot where her character is set ablaze, and ... and ... and is essentially killed in front of him. And then this other character steps in and resurrects her – for lack of a better term. And there’s this ... just this wonderful, touching beat at which she comes back to life and my character’s sort of holding her and they’re caressing each other, and you can tell that there’s genuine affection there underneath all this witty banter. There’s a certain depth of emotion there that, uh, was a really nice, nice feeling to play.
(Clip from “Point of View”)
ALT-CARTER: All we needed was the ratio of the decay rate of naqahdah relative to the energy output.
CHRISTOPHER JUDGE: Carter’s giving these, uh, just, uh, unintelligible, uh, scientific explanations of how we could destroy these hyperdrive chambers.
(Clip from another episode which, to my eternal shame, I can’t immediately identify. [Later identified as “Allegiance” by Josh M of Nitcentral])
CARTER: That might just excite the phase particles enough to bring them into our visible light spectrum.
O’NEILL: Carter ...
(Clip from “Crystal Skull”)
CARTER: Well, look at these readings, sir. These are leptons.
O’NEILL (sarcastically): Get out!
(Clip from “1969”)
CARTER: I have to update the computer’s drift calculation to include gravitational space-time warping.
(Clip from “Tin Man”)
CARTER: Recreating the neural structure on a ...
ROBOT CARTER: I know, I know, it defies the uncertainty principle.
(Clip from unidentified episode)
O’NEILL: Hey, hey, hey, hey.
(Clip from another couple of unidentified episodes, both showing Jack – bewildered by some of Sam’s exposition – saying ...)
O’NEILL: Aah!
(Clip from “Point of View”)
O’NEILL Are you Carters gonna be able to figure this out?
CARTER and ALT-CARTER (together): We’ll figure it out.

PRACTICAL JOKES.
(At the trailers, Chris sneaks up to Michael’s trailer.)
JUDGE (whispering to the camera): That’s Michael Shanks! (He sneaks into the trailer where Michael is lying down on a sofa.) Shanks! (Chris runs over and lies down on top of him. Michael wails at the weight. Chris kicks his legs into the air.) What’s up, man?!
MARTIN WOOD (Director, 200th episode): Almost every practical joke we do is aimed at Chris Judge ‘cause he’s the easiest target. So there was one time when, uh, we were in the Infirmary and he was lying in a bed and he actually fell asleep. And so I got everybody to leave. Everybody left the room and it took about five minutes. And he finally woke up and he was alone in this scene. And he woke up, and the look on his face was absolutely priceless. He had no idea where he was. And when it clicked in where he was, he had no idea where the crew was.
BEN BROWDER: Michael waited ‘til about the sixteenth episode before he finally got fed up with me. And, uh, it was actually both me and Judge he got fed up with. And he put in ear plugs so he didn’t have to listen to us carp at one another all day long. And for an entire week, Michael was wearing ear plugs through the entire episode.
(Clip from “Solitudes”: Jack painfully climbs up onto the ice on top of the DHD to join Sam.)
MARTIN WOOD: I remember the biggest one that I set up was the very first show I directed, where we were chipping away at the ice. And one of O’Neill’s lines is “I don’t know what to do.” And she just looks at him and goes ...
(Outtake from “Solitudes”)
CARTER: What, you spent seven years on MacGuyver and you can’t figure this one out? We ... we got belt buckles and shoelaces and a piece of gum – build a nuclear reactor, for cryin’ out loud. You used to be MacGuyver, MacGadget, MacGimmick, now you’re Mr MacUseless! (The crew giggles as Rick looks round at the camera. Amanda laughs and addresses the camera.) Dear God – I’m stuck on a glacier with MacGuyver!
(The crew laugh and applaud.)

THOR (dressed as Rygel from “Farscape” for the 200th episode): Hello, and welcome to “Sci Fi Inside: Stargate SG-1’s 200th Episode” starring ... me.
AMANDA TAPPING: The Asgard puppet is a bit of a prima donna. He has, like, an entourage of at least five people.
Bit of a sexual deviant. He harasses women. (She rolls her eyes in an annoyed way.) It’s what he does. He’s touched my bum on more than one occasion and claimed that he didn’t know he was doing it. “I couldn’t feel it,” he said, “through my rubber hands.” I don’t know. I think he’s a liar.
(Thor laughs evilly.)

(Gary Jones is talking quietly with Claudia Black.)
GARY JONES: Do you know if I’m in this episode? It’s the two hundredth, and, you know, it’s really important to me. I was not in the one hundredth episode, and I don’t know if I’m in the two hundredth. I really wanna be in it. Do ... have you heard anything?
CLAUDIA BLACK: What’s your character name again?
GARY JONES: Harriman! I’m, like, the Gate technician!
CLAUDIA BLACK: Oh, you’re the one that does the chevron ...
GARY JONES: Yeah, yeah.
CLAUDIA BLACK: ... one engaged ...?
GARY JONES: Yeah, I’ve been on it longer than you, how ‘bout?
CLAUDIA BLACK: I ... oh. Are you working today?
GARY JONES: No, not ... not technically. Still ... no.
CLAUDIA BLACK: Why-why are you in costume?
GARY JONES: Just thought I’d show up to see if I could, you know, be ready to go if they needed me.
CLAUDIA BLACK: You’re kidding, right?
(Hurt, Gary walks away. Claudia laughs.)
CLAUDIA BLACK (giggling): I’m sorry. That’s really funny.

MICHAEL SHANKS: There is no way that “Stargate SG-1” could have reached two hundred episodes without the creative contribution of so many people who all get about three days off a year.
MARTIN WOOD: Like, a million trucks ...
(A camera rolls along a long line of trucks. One of the drivers leans out of the window to the camera.)
DRIVER: Livin’ the dream!
MARTIN WOOD: ... ten thousand people, and, you know, you’ve got all this stuff to do. And you have these scripts that are like these big tomes of visual effects and things like that. And you have about seven and a half days to prep them.

(On location)
MICHAEL SHANKS (looking at the behind-the-scenes guys preparing the area): The Stargate crew ... definitely a story behind this because these people make this place run and this is the best group of people on the planet; they’re the best crew I’ve ever worked with.
INTERVIEWER: What are some of their names?
MICHAEL SHANKS: Umm ... (he shrugs and gestures vaguely at the crew) ... it’s the crew, I dunno – we don’t, like, talk or anything like that.

(Production Office.)
JOHN SMITH (The Guy Who Gets S*#T Done!): This is my tenth season. When I started, I had no grey hair. I had hair and I didn’t wear glasses. But no, it’s been a lot of fun. We’ve enjoyed every minute of it. We were shooting “Atlantis” on “SG-1”’s sets and “SG-1” on “Atlantis”’ sets. We’re intertwining the cast. If we average five sets per episode – lotta times we build eight or nine; some episodes we only do one or two – but let’s say five an episode. There’s a thousand sets. For me, the pride of all of that is my crew, they’re still totally approachable. Nobody’s head’s got too big. It’s nice to see that the egos haven’t, you know, got big with the ... with the success because I’ve seen it so much go the other way.
(John picks up a telephone.)
JOHN SMITH: Eric. Get my helicopter ready. I’m ready to go home.

MARTIN WOOD: We hadn’t done a lot of model work. We’d done some in, uh, in “Redemption.” We crashed a glider where we used a model. We didn’t ... we haven’t used a lot of models, uh, for this show, just because they’re so expensive to do. It always looks better, but, um, there just isn’t the time or the money to be able to do it in television often. In “Full Circle,” when you start blowing things up ... in this scale model [of the pyramid on Abydos] that we blew up of that, it’s just ... it adds that extra piece in it that makes it look more like a feature film than a television show should.
CHRISTOPHER JUDGE: Bar none, I think the end of Season nine was probably the greatest space battle. You look at the “Star Wars” franchise or you look at, um, any other space franchise and that battle sequence at the end of Season nine, it rates with any battle sequence you’ve ever seen.

---

REAL ACTING IS ... WAITING.
MICHAEL SHANKS: In ten years, I think I probably waited eight. See, watch, watch this. (He is standing in the Briefing Room of the SGC watching Martin Wood in discussion with the production crew.) Pan over here. Just wait with me. ... Just wait. ... Wait. ... Still here. ... Waiting. ... Waitinnnnng. ... That last scene was about twelve seconds long. We waited ... (he looks at his watch) ... I’ve been here since twenty of. An hour and a half. We’ve been waiting for twelve seconds. (He grins at the camera while gesturing into the room.) Hollywood, kids.

BRAD WRIGHT: We didn’t know whether or not we were gonna be able to get Richard Dean Anderson to be in the episode, and so some of the ideas that are in the two hundredth episode are ideas that would have worked had we not been able to get Rick.
(Clip from “200.” Sam is sitting in her lab talking to an empty chair.)
DANIEL: Sam, who you talking to?
CARTER: Oh, Colonel O’Neill. I was just explaining to him how we’re gonna make him visible again.
DANIEL: No, you’re not. Jack’s in Hammond’s office. (He walks into the room, waves his hand over the seat of the chair, then sits down.)
CARTER (throwing up her arms in despair): I can’t believe he did it to me again.
ROBERT COOPER: There’s a scene in which O’Neill is invisible and is walking down the hall with Teal’c. And in discussing the scene in production, uh, Martin said, “Wouldn’t it be great if he was carrying a coffee mug so that you’d just see this coffee mug marching down the hall?” So then we started talking about, “Well, how do you shoot that?” And you have to have a guy in a green suit. And then it came up, for some reason, in the production meeting that we didn’t have a guy to be in the green suit, but that Rick was there that day and he’s gonna do the scene anyways. It’s gonna be Rick in the green suit.
(Filming the scene, Rick is wearing a bright green suit that covers his entire body, complete with a bright green hood covering his face. He is walking along an SGC corridor holding a coffee mug. Teal’c is walking beside him.)
O’NEILL: Oh, I get it. Good one.
TEAL’C: I can see right through you.
O’NEILL: Don’t push it, fella. (He stops and takes a drink from his mug.)
MARTIN WOOD: And cut.

(Behind the set, Gary Jones is talking with Martin Wood.)
MARTIN WOOD: Why are you here?
GARY JONES: I ... I just need to know if I’m in the two hundredth episode. Nobody’s told me. I’ve talked to ... you know, I’ve talked ...
MARTIN WOOD: I told you last time: “Last day. Here’s the last cheque you’ll ever get from us. You are not ever supposed to come back.”
GARY JONES: You’re ... you’re kidding me. Come on. We go way back. (He pummels Martin’s chest in a friendly way.)
MARTIN WOOD: Yeah, yeah. Way back. I’m gonna say this to you one more time.
GARY JONES: I’m in the gear. Look, I’m ready to go. Can you just ...
MARTIN WOOD: Never again. What don’t you understand about “never again”?
GARY JONES (waving his hand dismissively): Oh, you said that before and it happened. C’mon – I’m in the gear.
MARTIN WOOD: It happened because you had an injunction against us. Now ...
GARY JONES (waving his hand again): That’s ...
MARTIN WOOD: We’re all over you, man. We’re all over you.
(Gary pummels Martin’s chest again.)
MARTIN WOOD: Stop doing that.
GARY JONES: OK.
MARTIN WOOD: Just ... leave.
GARY JONES: Alright. Alright.
(The two of them walk off in different directions.)

MICHAEL SHANKS (in a very theatrical voice): And now some of the things you’ve never known about the making of “Stargate SG-1.”
ROBERT COOPER: Well, you know, you make choices, uh, that ... that are ... at the time, they seem like the right thing to do. And then as you develop storylines or whatever as you go along, you ... you just look back, and you say, “Ooh, that’s a mistake.”
BRAD WRIGHT: Sometimes you’ll make a decision in the ... in the, uh, in the heat of production. For example, Jonathan needed to get rid of a body. He decided to change the rule or make up the rule that with a zat gun, shoot once, it stuns you; shoot twice, it kills you; shoot three times and you disappear. We’ve had to live with it. And so much so, we ... we just ... in the hundredth episode, we had to make a joke about it because it was a giant can of worms. You could make anything disappear. It’s ... you know, and so the joke in the hundredth episode was shoot it four times, of course, it comes back.

PRACTICE MAKES PERFECT.
(Filming “200,” SG-1 run across a field, firing back behind them. The scene ends and Martin Wood goes over to talk to the actors.)
MARTIN WOOD (to Amanda): It would look like a Replicator flew at you and ...
AMANDA TAPPING (out of breath): I was trying to run and speak technobabble and clear the weapon at the same time.
MARTIN WOOD: It worked. It worked fine.
MICHAEL SHANKS (sarcastically): And she couldn’t do it.
AMANDA TAPPING (sarcastically): I couldn’t do it.
MICHAEL SHANKS (sarcastically): She couldn’t do it.
AMANDA TAPPING (sarcastically): Couldn’t do it. I suck!
MARTIN WOOD: Did you not get the line out?
AMANDA TAPPING: I got the line out. I just didn’t clear the weapon, alright? I ran out of time.
MARTIN WOOD: You didn’t clear the weapon?
(Amanda sighs in irritation and turns away.)
ARMOURER: It jammed. Got a jam on that little weapon there, sir.
(Martin sighs and turns away.)
MARTIN WOOD: Let’s do it again.
(The actors repeat their run across the field. Afterwards, Martin talks to them again.)
MARTIN WOOD (to Michael): You were a little too close to camera, and we’re cutting you here. (He gestures to Michael’s throat.)
AMANDA TAPPING (accusingly): Uh, Michael!
CHRISTOPHER JUDGE (equally accusingly): Michael!
MICHAEL SHANKS: I was ... no! (He gestures to the area they ran across.) That’s where the dandelion line was. I stuck to it this time.
MARTIN WOOD: Got a little outside the dandelions.
CHRISTOPHER JUDGE (to Michael in a sarcastic tone): Why don’t you go back and read your books?
MICHAEL SHANKS: Shut up!
(The actors do the run for a third time. Afterwards, Martin walks towards them.)
MARTIN WOOD: That’s the one.
(In the studio, Amanda applauds wildly and cheers silently.)
AMANDA TAPPING: The men cheered. The women fainted. The children waved multi-coloured flags!

HOW THEY’VE CHANGED.
MARTIN WOOD: The biggest change and growth I think has been in Teal’c because he’s gotten way bigger on the top and way smaller in the stomach. It’s funny – if you actually put clips of Teal’c together from year one, ten years’ worth, he used to be a big, fat guy. But you never knew it because he sort of was proportional.
CHRISTOPHER JUDGE: You know what? ‘Cause I’m getting older. And it’s ... it’s harder to be thin. Actually, all it is, is I’m the butt of more jokes now. (He laughs.)
MARTIN WOOD: He goes like this: (he gestures to show Christopher’s change in shape, then laughs.) It’s just so funny.
CHRISTOPHER JUDGE: I like to call them my “I-don’t-care-about-physical-appearance-I’m-an-artist” years. (He looks at the camera, his eyes wide.) Hoo, boy!
(Footage of Chris taken when he was still bald. He has a plate of food in front of him.)
CHRISTOPHER JUDGE: Scrambled eggs, bacon, and sausage. The key to starting a good day.
CHRISTOPHER JUDGE (now): I had a lot of Twinkies that year. And, you know, it’s just ... it is really amazing, though, to look back and see what we all used to look like or sound like. But the one great thing is that we’re still having fun doing it, man.
(Various clips of Sam throughout the years. Cut to Amanda today, laughing.)
AMANDA TAPPING: But how many bad hairstyles has Carter had?! I thought, oh, I just really want ... I want her to have longer hair. I want her to be more feminine. When I had auditioned, I had long, like, shoulder-length hair and they wanted it shorter. And I never felt like we got it until, you know, quite recently – ‘til in the last few years, we actually got it. But I tried to grow it longer and that was, like, a massive mistake. And then, uh, I just chopped it all off, just super-short, which was kinda cute for about ten minutes. And then I got bored. So I don’t know. In a perfect world, I’d have long hair again but I can’t ‘cause it’s military. In the flashbacks and in, you know, fun little jaunts like that, I get to have long hair. It’s weird. It’s just, you know, it’s become such a thing. And I actually went to Europe and I had longer hair and nobody recognised me. And the next year I went back with short hair and I was, like, barraged everywhere I went. “Sam Carter!” “Sam Carter!” I don’t know. It’s really identifiable. Women come up to me and say, “I cut my hair like yours. What products do you use?” Wow! OK!
MICHAEL SHANKS: Oh, God. I haven’t got the full death count. I know about ... of about four, maybe five deaths on camera. I think Spader died in the original movie. Um, I died, supposedly, in the first season of the show. And I died, of course, for good in Season five. Came back, died again in Season eight. Uh, what are we up to now? Is that ... I don’t know. I lost count on my fingers. There’s about, you know, I’d say five. Maybe, you know, there’s a vague sixth death in there somewhere. I’ve ascended twice ... and counting, of course. And, apparently, there’s something interesting in store for the character this year that people don’t know about, which I won’t, um, get into detail about. But there’s supposedly something that’s not death, not ascension. Somewhere in between. (He smiles mysteriously at the camera, wiggling his fingers in a mysterious way.)

AND THE STUNT AWARD GOES TO ...
BEN BROWDER: I try to do as much stunt work as they’ll allow me to do. It’s the fun stuff. It’s the boy stuff. And as long as I can get out of my chair to ... to go do it, I like doing it. I love doing the swordfights, particularly the sword fight in “Camelot.” I like it whenever we’re falling down, getting muddy, dirty, smacking each other around. The next episode, if it’s a “Three Stooges” episode, I’m there. It’s the fun stuff and it is the stuff that you don’t get to do on mainstream network fare on any kind of regular basis.
(Footage of rehearsals for the stunt in “Beach Head” where several locals are hurled backwards through the air by a Prior.)
DAN SHEA (Stunt Coordinator/Sgt Siler): Uh, we’ve been here for ten years, and let’s say twenty-two episodes a year. Couple of stunts an episode, so that adds up to ... (he closes his eyes in concentration) ... OK, the square root of twenty-nine ... seven ... times ... so I would say, like, a lot. I would say, like, thousands of stunts. We’re big on ratchets here, like, with the staff blast and with the ribbon device. Lotta times we’ll put the foamy, you know, a little bit that way, and you slam right into the steel, as opposed to the foamy.
(Various shots of Dan, as Siler, being electrocuted and blown back against a hard door in the Gateroom.)
DAN SHEA: And it looks cooler ‘cause you get a better reaction when the eyes flutter up into the skull, and you get that little bit of subcutaneous blood kind of trickling down the left nostril. And that’s all great.
(A final shot of Dan/Siler slamming against the door, then looking up indignantly.)
SILER: Why does this always happen to me?
MARTIN WOOD: And cut. Nice. One more.

I’LL NEVER KISS AND TELL!
AMANDA TAPPING (laughing): That’s hard to answer. I ... now I have to go back and relive every kiss. (She looks thoughtful.)
(Clips of Sam kissing Jack in “Moebius part 2,” Felger in “The Other Guys,” and Narim in “Enigma.”)
AMANDA TAPPING: Richard Dean Anderson’s a great kisser. David DeLuise was a really good kisser. (Various clips of Sam kissing Pete.) David DeLuise and I got to play this new part of Sam – this more sexual and mature and more adult-situation Sam – and so those kisses were different. They were far more passionate. So I’d have to say David because they were really passionate kisses.

HOW “INDEED” IS “INDEED”?
CHRISTOPHER JUDGE: That’s something I’d like to know: how many times has Teal’c said, “Indeed”? I believe that a fan actually counted how many times that Teal’c has said, “Indeed.” Uh, not counting this season, Season ten, but through the end of Season nine, I believe it was 27,896 times.
(The number appears on the screen, then disappears in an explosion and a puff of smoke.)
CHRISTOPHER JUDGE: That’s just a number I just made up. (He smiles at the camera.) No-one’s actually ever counted.

Gary Jones walks over to the security office at the gate to Bridge Studios. A security guard comes out of the office.
SHELLY RAMSELL (Security Guard, Bridge Studios): Can I help you, sir?
GARY JONES: Yeah, um, I’m on “Stargate SG-1” and, uh ...
SHELLY RAMSELL: What do you do there?
GARY JONES: I’m one of the actors.
SHELLY RAMSELL: Uh, background or principal?
GARY JONES: No, one of the actors. I’m like ... well, not a ... yeah, a principal. I was just wondering if you would know whether or not I’m gonna be in the two hundredth episode.
SHELLY RAMSELL: Unfortunately I wouldn’t. What’s your name?
GARY JONES: I mean, I’m ... recurringly regular.
SHELLY RAMSELL: Do you have a pace card?
GARY JONES (sighing): No, I don’t have a pace card. I didn’t get it this year. Are you sure ...
SHELLY RAMSELL: Having a pace card is very helpful. (She looks down at a call sheet.) What’s your number when you shoot?
GARY JONES: I ... well, they ... it changes all the time. It’s, like, 7, 13, 11, depending on whatever other actors are on. So I don’t ...
SHELLY RAMSELL: The numbers don’t go up that high for the next few days. They end at four.
GARY JONES (looking down miserably): Yeah.
SHELLY RAMSELL: Sorry. (She goes back indoors.)
GARY JONES: Thanks.

MATT ROUSH (TV critic, TV Guide magazine): What people do like about the “Stargate” series is that it’s not set in the far future. It imagines the fact that we have this technology at our hand right now, that the military is keeping it secret from us – that they have a team that’s going along and having these adventures through the portals, but they come back into our world and our time right now. I think that’s kind of provocative. The fact that so many science fiction shows are set in some kind of nebulous future century ... well, the fact is that the future is now on “Stargate.”

(Getting ready to film in the Briefing Room.)
MARTIN WOOD: Before we get started, I wanna welcome everybody to the two hundredth episode of “Stargate SG-1.”
(The actors and the crew cheer and applaud.)
(Later, the main cast, including RDA, are standing in front of the Stargate with a cake on a table in front of them. It is a black rectangular slab with “CONGRATULATIONS!” written across the top. Propped up behind that word is a small plaque with “Stargate SG-1” on it, and behind that is a large “200.” The “2” is bright blue; the two zeros are Stargates filled with bright blue to represent the event horizon. Later, a caterer is cutting the cake into slices and putting them onto plates. The cast and crew are watching clips from the show projected into the circle of the Stargate.)

ROBERT COOPER: I said at the beginning when we started talking about this coming up, I said, “Let’s just not do anything, you know, special, as far as the episode goes. Let’s just ... let’s have a big party and celebrate it for the crew and the cast, but let’s just make a normal episode of television, not go outside the box.” (He laughs.) So that’s how we ended up going completely outside the box ...
BRAD WRIGHT: We’re so far outside the box!
ROBERT COOPER: ... Nobody listens to me!
JOSEPH MALLOZZI (Writer/Executive Producer): Well, I gotta say, it’ll be very interesting to see the fan reaction to this particular episode. Because there’s no doubt that, um, I mean, a lot of the fans complain: you know, they’ll say ... you know, they argue back and forth about, “Oh, the episode ‘Wormhole X-treme!’ was the episode where they jumped the shark,” or, you know, they may argue, “No, no, no. It was ‘Avenger 2.0.’ That’s the one where they jumped the shark.” And then there’s another contingent that’ll say, “No, it was actually ‘Space Race’ that they jumped the shark.” This two hundredth episode will put that debate to rest. (He laughs.)
BRAD WRIGHT: I mean, it’s fun. That’s what the show is.
ROBERT COOPER: Fans of the show, uh, who’ve been with us for ... since the beginning are gonna get a ton of inside jokes. People who haven’t seen the show as much will still hopefully think of it as an entertaining hour.

(Rick is on location for what I think is the beginning of the scene where they meet the Furlings in “200.”)
RICHARD DEAN ANDERSON: Aww, de babies. You’re so cute.
(A man in black, presumably pretending to be a Furling, is lumbering towards Rick making a ferocious mewling sound.)
RICHARD DEAN ANDERSON: You’re so cute. Come on.
(He pretends to shoot the man, who recoils, cries out and falls to the ground. Rick pretends to strafe him with machine gun fire. The crew laugh.)

RICHARD DEAN ANDERSON: I actually had to ask Brad, um ... or Robert – they’re starting to look like each other (he laughs), yeah – if this was an episode that stood alone or if it was part of what has been transpiring prior. Like, is there a through-line bad guy that we kind of have to dance around?
MARTIN WOOD (giving instructions to someone on set): Remember, play it with greed.
RICHARD DEAN ANDERSON: He said, “No, this is completely a different entity. It stands all by itself.” And it’s a fun episode. So you’ll have that fun factor.
AMANDA TAPPING: I love that Richard’s back. It’s only right.
(In the Briefing Room, Martin introduces Richard to everyone.)
MARTIN WOOD: Richard Dean Anderson, ladies and gentlemen.
(Applause.)
AMANDA TAPPING: It wouldn’t feel right if he wasn’t back with us. I mean, his first entrance was pure Rick. He was wearing sweatpants and long, baggy shorts over top and a big T-shirt, and he looked like a complete clown and that’s Rick.
CHRISTOPHER JUDGE: It was really great to be reminded what a pain in the ass he is. Um ... (He laughs.)
MARTIN WOOD: It’s so irreverent toward the people who make and own the shows. It’s so irreverent against the people who write and create the shows. It’s so irreverent against the actors who do the show. It’s ... it’s irreverent against everybody except the Director, who, uh, you know, is ... the integrity is always there for the director. Even in “200.”
BEAU BRIDGES: I think there’s a little something for everybody, certainly, in this episode. I mean, it’s all going on. They’re kind of dealing with a lot of different sci-fi shows, sending a lot of them up.
MICHAEL SHANKS: We share the same sort of “Galaxy Quest” ideas about science fiction. And we all wanna write this movie about a bunch of actors on a science fiction show because the experiences are so similar: the rumble hits and the firing guns that don’t really fire ‘cause there’s ... “Oh, there’s gonna be a ray that comes out of it,” so you feel like a complete jackass standing there going ... (he mimics firing a gun that isn’t really firing.)
ROBERT COOPER: When you’re on for eight years, I think there’s a certain point at which people feel like, “Huh. You know, that show’s been on awhile. Maybe I should check it out. Maybe it’s good,” you know?
BRAD WRIGHT: Yeah, the reluctant viewer: (in an exasperated voice) “OK, I’ll watch it. Jeez!” Yeah, I make the analogy that instead of being this big, flaming hit that, you know, burns out after a number of years, we’re like a slowly burning candle that’s just, you know ...
ROBERT COOPER: ... always there and always on.
BRAD WRIGHT: Always on!

Gary Jones makes his way to Beau Bridges’ trailer. Looking around to make sure nobody’s looking, he knocks at the door. Beau opens the door, talking on his cellphone.
BEAU BRIDGES: That sounds good to me. But ... one second. (He lowers the phone and talks to Gary.) Hey, Gary.
GARY JONES: Hey, Beau, listen. I’m trying to get on the two hundredth episode. I’ve been talking to everybody, including Rob Cooper. The guy hasn’t got a clue. He’s up there in his big office, “I don’t know, I don’t know.” The point is: you’re my last resort, OK? Is there ... is there any way you could get me on the show? And if you can, I’ve got ... in my pocket here, I’ve got a hundred large, for you.
BEAU BRIDGES: You’re walking around with a hundred thousand dollars in your shirt pocket?!
GARY JONES: No. No. (He takes some notes out of his pocket and shows them to Beau.) A hundred Canadian. It’s yours. (He holds the money out to Beau.) Will you do it?
(Beau looks around to see if anybody’s watching, then takes the money and starts to close the door.)
GARY JONES: OK, Beau, Beau, Beau – so that’s a guarantee, right? If you take that, I’m on the show.
BEAU BRIDGES: Guarantee? What, you want a receipt? This is a bribe!
GARY JONES: It’s not so much a bribe as it is a ... gratuity.
(Beau grins and shuts the door.)
(The show ends with clips from “200” and other earlier episodes.)