Well, we finally made it board two, and thankfully the name has been changed! However, I have one request for one of the posters; Khistra\Caractus, please go read Roll Call 2 in this same section of the board; The person who posted as `The member of the Lone Gunmen you haven't met yet' is right; TONE IT DOWN!

I will. Read my post on the Roll Call 2 board.

Hmmmm....well, that blows my theory.....I've got a second idea who you are, but I'm not entirely sure about it. *cough*Jason*cough*

HAHAHAHA!!! Wrong-o again, me bucko! But keep trying.

You know, I think this just might be lots of fun. heh heh heh

Darn! I forgot to post in blue above. Well, no matter. On with the show!

Two men were walking in the woods, arguing. One, rather portly, with dark hair, bangs cut straight above his eyes, and a most odd mustache, if indeed it was even enough of one to be called such, for it was only about as wide as either eye. He did most of the talking. The other man, slightly shorter, slim, had a boyish face and dirty blonde hair standing up in an almost unkempt way, or so it appeared at least. He just listened to his companion with a dispatched sort of look, not saying much in return. They both had matching funny looking round black hats. The portly one spoke.

Well, here's another fine mess you've gotten us into, Staylen. Now we're hopelessly, and probably forever, lost inside these godsforsaken woods. Now what have you got to say for yourself?

The one named Staylen just gave his friend a perplexed look, trying to figure out just what it was he did to get them lost, but failing. He opened his mouth to reply, only saying two words.

Well, Olivius...

when the rotund man said,

Wait! Do you hear that? Singing! And in a most pleasant voice, too, I might add. Obviously, there's a beautiful young lady in need of my services, and who am I to refuse a beautiful lady?

Olivius twiddled his fingers and adjusted his hat, unnecessarily. They left the path they trode on and made their way through some heavy foliage towards the source of the singing. He then unceremoniously tripped over an exposed root.

Wa-a-alp! he cried out in a near high-pitched voice, not unlike a female's itself. Staylen was right behind him, avoiding the root but then tripping over his companion. Olivius took his hat off and whapped Staylen's head with it and then put his forefinger to his lips and said,

Shhh! Don't frighten the lass! She'll hear you!

They came to a few trees and high bushes on the edge of a clear blue pond, which itself was at the mouth of a creek. They could hear a waterfall and the singing ever closer. They hid behind the foliage and then parted the leaves to get a better look at the owner of the voice that had so entranced them. What they saw took their breath away. A young female--they couldn't determine her age--that was not only beautiful, but the most beautiful female they'd ever had the pleasure to lay their eyes on. She was bathing underneath the waterfall, a sight to rival any goddess. In fact, they believed her to be a goddess come to earth. They were so bewitched by her that they failed to notice they suddenly had company, until that company made its presence known in a most uplifting fashion.

Aiee-ayyieee!!!

They both screamed as they went flying head over heals through the air in a high arc, straight towards the pond, the waterfall and the beautiful goddess underneath it. They barely heard her ear-piercing screams as they hit the water on their backsides, turning upwards under the surface, before hitting the shallow bottom on their bottoms. The pair stood up for air, sputtering out water. Disoriented, they noticed the girl cowering in suprised fear, a cloth held against her bosom and belly. Their eyes opened wider than they've ever been before and the men turned around in emabarassment to exit the water, posthaste, tripping again on the way out. Olivius gasped out,

Please forgive us, young lass! We meant no harm! We'll take our leave now, right aw--ulp!

They found their path blocked by a huge black and orange mountain of fur, teeth and attitude. Spinning around again they made once more for the pond, again once more tripping into the water. They stood up, trying and failing miserably to get away from the scene as fast as they could. Then they heard a giggling laugh and looked at the girl, who was now completely covered by the cloth, and looking at them with tears in her eyes and bent over from laughing so hard. The men looked at each other at a loss for words, and then back at her. Then, remembering the behemoth they'd just run into the taller man said,

Young lass, quickly! Leave! There's a mountainous beast with a thousand teeth just waiting to eat us all up! We must hie away from here now!

The girl couldn't finish laughing for awhile, but then she composed herself and finally said,

Fear not, sirs, for Bellepherus will not hurt you...unless I so order it. But you two seem harmless enough. Bumblers, yes, but harmless. Had Bellepherus known otherwise you most definitely wouldn't be standing there in one piece. You both look hungry. Follow me to my cottage and I'll fix you some food.

Staylen and Olivius, sopping wet, followed the girl, the idea of real food, after so many days with little more than berries and what roots they could forage, sounded extremely appealing to their stomaches. The girl said,

I am called Khistra, the Tiger Maiden, but just Khistra is fine. Bellepherus is my constant companion, which, as much as I welcome and enjoy the attention sometimes, can also be rather overbearing, but I love him and so would never change a thing about him. Well, except for being too over-protective, perhaps.

So by what names are you two known?

Olivius spoke first, bowing as deeply as his rotund belly would allow. Dear lady, I am Olivius Haardi, at your humble service.

Staylen said, rather shyly and with slight embarassment, And I am Staylen Lorrol, your beautiness.

I am pleased to meet you both, kind Sirs Lorrol and Haardi, and welcome to my home. Stay as long as you wish, but you must earn your stay. But that may wait for the morrow. Now, we eat.

Meanwhile, back in town...

Ok, it's time for someone else to post something now. I'll wait a couple days.

Dhalric turns to the others, an amused look on his face.

Well, that was interesting.....so, are we going to go into the Academy or are we going to stand here all day?!

I'm ready, let's go!

Lorrol and Haardi? LOL! "I'm sorry Oli, me-me-me-me-me."

Come, let us go, and investigate this strange matter.

Well, what are we waiting for? Lets go! He pushes the door to the Academy open and walks in, with the others following behind him. The room they enter looks like a large library with a ceiling at least 60 feet high!

So...who do we have to talk to for information around here?

Noman walks straight to the librarian's desk...

Greetings. Noman Gilinde Celebrimbor am I, Bard of the harp, from the College of Sant Akruz. Perhaps you can help me? I'm interested in doing some research into the history of the Heart of Power.

Which section should I look in?

Since it was stolen 500 years ago, perhaps the History section?

Sant Akruz? I looove it! Maybe later I'll tell you why...maybe.

A man of average looks approaches the men, a bit apprehensive of their looks, and says to them, somewhat nervously and failing miserably at hiding it,

I am Brrtnrrnii, director of this great and vast library. How may I help you gentlemen?

Greetings, Brrtnrrnii, I am Sir Bowen, leader of this expedition. We seek information on something known as the Heart of Power. It was once owned by an unpriestly priest and is believed to have been seen in a place called Silvercliff. Do you have any volumes about it?

While the heroes are occupied with Brrtnrrni, Caladron walks off down a side corridor, and enters a door.

(Keeran pulls a thick tome from a shelf and idly pages through it)

Spells of the Mage Asteroth...hmm. Rethus...Deneri...Palmeta!

(A humorous effect of the spell fails to occur, and Keeran shrugs and puts the book back on the shelf. A small note falls from the bookshelf onto the floor. Curious, Keeran picks it up and looks over the piece of parchment. He reads out loud...)

Seek ye are now
Find it ye shall
Look in the air
Yet not in the sky.

Adventurers take heed
dangerous your quest
Ware ye should be
or death ye shall taste.

One you may meet
evil shall harbor
tho in guise of good
the crystal reveals all.

Tho long be your trek
rewards ye shall find
heed well my words
life doth follow the cat.

The cat? Hmmm, is this a real cat or perhaps some statue, or something? I have heard of religions who worship cats, because one of their gods once posessed the body of a cat. I don't remember where they were though, perhaps this might have something to do with it?

Asteroth? Wasn't he the younger brother of the Arch-mage Azathoth, or was that his father?

Look in the air
Yet not in the sky?

Sounds pretty strange to me. What could it mean? Who wrote it? Why?

ARGH! Stup¡d computer let me log onto my server and open windows but without seeing the contents or surfing! All I could do was play a videogame!

gasp! The Heart of Power? Wh-what do you want with that? Do you not know the story of it? It's pure evil and dangerous! Too much so for mere mortals to possess, no matter to use! It's for the gods only. Any mortal that even so much as sees it dies a thousand deaths, each more horrible and painful than the last.

Yes, I do have many volumes on The Heart of Power, but they are stored away in a vault for just such evil items that never should again see the light of day. In fact, I've got several hirelings roaming the world searching for these items. At first it was just two, a young man and a beautiful red-headed woman, but they were taking years to find everything so I had to hire more people. My collection is vast but there are still many, many times more items that must be found and returned at once. Uh, perhaps you kind folks would be willing to search for some of these items and return them to me for a fair price?

Notices Keeran looking at his selected tome and the sheaf of paper than falls to the floor.

Uh, kind sir, please put that book back on the shelf. You don't need to be looking at that. It's of no importance or significance to you. It's just a silly old book.

chuckles a bit nervously.

Listen, kind sirs, to a tale long and mysterious about the The Heart of Power, so that you will know not to seek it out, so that you may live and long and prosper in this world, and marry many wives and sire many children.

And with that, Brrtnrrnii began his tale.

The Heart of Power is more than you know. More than you could or should know. It's more than you've ever heard. It was created in a time before time, when the gods themselves did not yet exist. Yes, my friends, the gods have their own origins once upon a time, and did not always exist, contrary to popular belief. They, of course, would tell you diffently. That is, should you ever perchance to meet one. Not that you would live long to tell that tale, either, for the gods are very protective of their glorious selves.

Enough! I digress. On with the story. The Heart, quite the wrong name for it, as it not shaped like a heart, or at least any known shape for a heart, was created by evil. Not an evil in bodily form, but an intangible, pure evil force, told by various prophecies across these many lands and throughout the millenia as heralding the coming of the last days of time, so that evil shall rule for all the rest of eternity.

shudders

My friends, I beseech thee, end your quest for this thing, for it will only bring you pain and misery and death. And mere death will not be enough, but eternal damnation and torture of your souls. It is too horrible and ghastly to even think about!

But I digress again. I shall continue on in a moment, for I feel a bit weak and must rest a short spell. This happens to me quite often, too often than I'd welcome. Stay, look around if you wish but please do not touch anymore books, for merely doing so could have the most devastating effects on your person, or the entire world! I humor thee not for it is most definitely not a laughing matter. Fear not, I shall continue my story, but I must retire to my office to rest now.

Makes his exit to an arched door ten paces away.

In truth, I've got to leave but I will continue the tale.

See if you can find a book by an author named `Garris Onkiellor'. It might prove to be useful. I believe one of his ancestors was involved with the artifact a few centuries ago. (He pauses)Well, I'll leave Keeran, and any others who want to look around, here and go find a tavern. I'm parched. If anyone wants to join me, lets go!

He pulls his cloak tighter around him, and proceeds to leave, the door shutting quietly behind him.

From inside the office comes a terrifying scream, and loud pleas for the victim's life. A loud thud is heard behind the door, as if something large and heavy has fallen. Then, all is quiet. The men left inside the library look at each other, knowing without saying what has just transpired within those office walls.

The door slowly opens, and a smallish, balding man with a maniacal look on his face emerges, a wickedly evil cackling emanating from his quivering, slobbering lips, one hand holding a double-edged serrated dagger dripping bright crimson onto the floor. He speaks in a deranged, childlike voice.

Hee! Hee! That's what happens to bad little boys who talk about things they shouldn't. Hee! Hee! The master will be pleased with me now, oh, yessss!

I trust you gentlemen know what to do with this scoundrel. You have my permission. Go for it!

I'm gonna take care of him if he tries to sneak out the window...(Dharlic has excellent hearing!)

Outside the Academy, Dhalric hears someone scream from inside the building. He reaches beneath his cloak and puts one hand on the grip of one of his double-swords, ready to draw it at a moments notice. He looks at the windows of the building, and pinpoints which one the scream came from.

The door across the hall from the one the maniac emerge from is flung open, and the heroes see a bright flash of light, quickly followed by three more. The maniac is pinned against the wall by the daggers protruding from each elbow, and one at each shoulder. Caladron steps from the room and mumbles something about unlicensed jerks being bad for business and steps up to the man.

"Well, what do we have here?", sneers Caladron. "Well, gentlemen, shall we see what our friend has gotten himself into?"

Caladron motions for one of the guards to watch the slobbering idiot, who has dropped the knife he had due to the intense pain in his arms. The heroes step into the room and see....

...Brrtnrrnii on the floor. On his desk. On his shelves. And on the ceiling. The entire room was drenched with his blood and insides, which had now become his outsides. Their nostrils were bombarded by the incredible stench from the gore, their eyes, used to seeing death in most of its unglorious forms, were assailed by the sight of such destruction of a human body. The assassin had done his work only too well. As one they all turned their heads and squeezed their eyes tightly shut for a moment to recover their composure. It was all they could do not to vomit.

Caladron takes in the scene with a critical eye...

"Shame he's such a zealot and maniac...I could use someone with this touch..."

He exits the room back to the hall where the assassin is being held.

"Who hired you? Who are you working for? If you won't talk willingly, I have...assosciates...who can get the information from your wormy little head for me..."

Muttering to himself...

Garris Onkiellor...

Raises his voice a bit...

Fellow Questers! Listen to this!

---

Quote:

Behold, the Heart of Power shall lie hidden until it is found. Then, shall neither mortal man nor spirit unclean take it up, lest the power of the jewel destroy him.

---

Then how are we to return it to the Temple from where it was stolen? Not even Cascerot can carry it, and I was planning to use him for it. But what does this tell you about the one who stole it? Surely he must be a god... or a demon...

"Neither mortal man nor spirit"...yes, it could be a god or demon, but I suggest a much more common creature. A creature Undead, or Unliving. A zombie or mummy, or on the other hand, a golem or homunculus could touch it, given that they are not mortal, nor have a spirit.

Dhalric, having returned to the Academy to see what happened, overhears Keeran...

I may be able to do something about that, but we'll have to make a trip to Silvercliff. I know a mage there known as Jastrus the Animator, who specializes in creating golems. He's quite jovial and friendly, but he plays a mean game of `Crack the Bones'. I still owe him 500 gilder from our last game, as a matter of fact.

"Ummm, it says no mortal MAN...what about a woman?"

Ahh, an excellent observation, Caladron. Of course, this would only work if the author was deliberately being literal. I wouldn't like to chance it, though. Perhaps we should try a golem, like Dhalric suggests...

The zealot, still cackling his insaneness to the small group of travelers, mouth profusely dripping saliva, eyes wide in lunatic ecstacy, looks at Caladron, and tells him,

Fools! You're all fools! Hee! Hee! Don't you recognize my blue robes? Don't you know who my master is? I am of the one true faith. The one true faith that soon all the world will embrace! Hee! Hee!

...making another sudden grand entrance, followed by Lorrol and Haardi, looking with nervous smiles around at the gathered men in the gigantic building of knowledge and learning. She walks up to the zealot, slowly twists both daggers holding him in place, enjoying the wince of pain it gives him, then puts one long, slim fingertip to his chin, and with eyes slitted almost completely, in an unusually deep, husky voice so unlike her ferocious femininity, says to him,

I recognize you, and your blue robes, you overly delusional waste of space and poor excuse of a human being. Kind Sirs, you see before you Exabuuc, the lowest of the lowest minions of the worst religion to ever be created. See how the blood splattered all over his robe has partially hidden the oceanic symbol of his so-called faith? He belongs to the notorious Blue Oyster cult, led by the infamous Joodis priests, who hold black sabbaths to sacrifice young virgins to a non-existant seashell god. These fools expect to take over the entire world one day, but of course they won't. Please take him outside. Bellepherus is waiting to deal with him in his own...inimitable style. He so loves these miscreants.

She finished with a wry smile to her full, luscious lips. Again followed by her two new friends of a few days she then walks to the office, looks around at the remains of Brrtnrrnii, picks up his head and says to it, in a very exasperated sigh,

Oh, Brrtnrrnii, you fool. You've gone and done it again, haven't you? When will you ever learn?

Lorrol and Haardi look at each other, perplexed at the sight before them, noses scrunched a bit, mouths turned down in slight frowns, unable to say anything...

...until the head's eyes and mouth opened...

Khistra? Is that you? It has been so long, my precious lady. I'm only sorry that we couldn't have met again under better circumstances. Would it be asking too much for your help in putting me back together again? I would be eternally grateful and I promise that it will be the last time.

Oh, you darling fool. Of course I will. But I'm afraid I don't have the proper items to do it with this time. Bellepherus and I'll be going on a journey with these gentlemen. A long, hard and very dangerous journey. You can come along with us. Bellerpherus will carry you on his back. We'll find what we need along the way, if the one we need to get them from still lives where she has all her life.

Thank you, my young, beautiful Khistra. I can't wait. You can't imagine how it feels to experience the odd sensation of a lack of sensation to your body. It's very disconcerting, as well as utterly indescribable, to say the least.

You're right. I can't imagine how you must be feeling. Or rather, not feeling. smiles

She then hears a very easily recognizable noise: that of her two new friends heaving the full contents of their stomaches. She smiles again, slightly, as her head turns to see Lorrol and Haardi bent over a spot on the floor not hit by spraying blood during the attack on Brrtrrnii, whose head she still held.

My friends, my deepest apologies. I should have warned you about this. Indeed, I never should've allowed you to follow me into this office. Come. We'll leave now.

Carrying Brrtnrrnii's head she meets up again with the travelers in the hallway and says to no one in particular,

Now, gentlemen, what's this about the Heart of Power you're searching for? You've seen what the Joodis priests do to those who speak of it.

gesturing with the head towards them

They have spies everywhere and always takes great measures to protect the Heart and its whereabouts. As I've said before you'll need me on your journey to help you get there in the fastest time possible. I have the maps you'll need to accomplish your journey.

We have two major ways to go. One, the fastest, is also the deadliest, for that way lies the Valley of the Living Brain Dead, what you may know of as zombies. I don't know how much you know of them but these Brain Dead are animated by magicks, the likes of which are as yet unknown to me. Fortunately, they're very stup¡d. Unfortunately they're also very strong, several times moreso than an average man, so avoid their embrace, for they will not release you until they've entirely eaten all of your flesh. They're not very fast moving, so avoidance is easy enough, but if one so much as even slightly scratches you you will become one of them within a day's time, unless you have the cure for it, a potion, and I do. I have plenty of it, but I feel it only fair to tell you that you are not to drink any of it unless you are attacked by a Brain Dead, and only then. For those of you who don't heed these warnings there will be grave consequences.

The second, and longest, way to go will take an extra month, and is over rougher terrain, but with less fatal dangers. The choice is yours, but you won't get through either way the first time without our help.

Oh, and I'll kindly please need someone to pick up the rest of Brrtnrrnii's body. I'll need it to put him back together again. Thank you.

Yes, kind sirs, thank you for the service. It will feel good to be whole once more.

And with that Khistra leaves the building to meet up with the great tiger she calls companion, knowing without looking at the men to know their reaction to a talking head.

I vote we go the second way. Meddling in the affairs of magick is not a feat any mortal must do. But will it be quick enough? Do any of you feel they can cope with the first route?

I vote we go the second way. Meddling in the affairs of magick is not a feat any mortal must do. But will it be quick enough? Do any of you feel they can cope with the first route?

Cascarot might...but I agree with you the second way sounds safer. If we try to run as much as is safe on the rough terain we might shorten the time it would take. What do you think?

Well, personally, I think we should take a path through the Nhokkonn Woods, but that's just my opinion.....

Caladron walks over to the wall and retreives his daggers. He picks up a shard of the zealots cloak, and cleans them before returning them to their hiding places.

"I agree with Dhalric. Zombies are dumb and slow, but they are also restless. They don't sleep, and we have DO eventually. Besides, I have...friends...in Silvercliff that might be able to get us some information."

With that, Caladron picks up one of Brrtnrrnii's detached legs and walks outside.

*Note, I didn't just make a type...its a dialect thing...

Sur-r-re, Cal's Author, sur-r-re. We believe you. Yes, we do, really. Uh huh. And don't forget to type in blue when speaking out of character, ok?

Khistra turns Brrtnrrnii's head in order to let him see some of the men bring out the rest of him, and then putting them in the designated rucksack that was customized to carry bloody, loose body parts. Actually, just his, Khistra's having become used to his...predilection...to not being able to keep his mouth shut about the Heart of Power or the dangerous Blue Oyster cult that guards it, and thus paying the price just as often as he speaks of them.

Thank you again, kind sirs. Hopefully, the journey won't be long so that I may be a whole man once again.

So, dear Brrtnrrnii, have you finally learned your lesson on speaking of the Heart of Power and those who possess it yet? Or will I have to come many more times to save you? It's getting harder every time to keep you whole, you know. Keep this up and you'll remain a bodiless head before long and then there won't be anything I or anyone else can do to help you anymore. Understand?

When we get to Silvercliff, I'll see if Jastrus can do something about Brrtnrrnii's....condition. Maybe he has a spare stone golem body he can attach the head to, or something!

Yes, young mistress. I never knew what I was getting myself into when I paid that witch woman for that immortality potion. She said nothing about it not protecting me from dismembership. Only from ever dying. Not a day goes by that I dread being torn asunder for good, without ever knowing the joy of walking barefoot through the grass or to swim in a rolling stream or to look up at will at the clouds in the sky, or to avoid rain or wild animals when away from home, or to even pick a mere flower, not to mention feed myself. You know how much I love to eat. I daresay I've finally learned my lesson, and vow never again to speak about the Hear--er, you-know-what and you-know-who.

...putting Brrtnrrnii's parts in the sack, then affixing his head to her saddle horn.

Yes, well, you'll forgive my skeptism, seeing as how you've made that exact same vow numerous times before. And yes, I know only too well how much you love to eat, but at least one positive side effect of the potion was that you can eat and drink all you want without ever getting full, fat, drunk or sick. That is, as long as you can keep your mouth shut and your body whole for good from now on.

Have no fear, young mistress, for I feel I finally have learned my lesson. Now, let's begin this journey, shall we, my dear?

And so we shall, dearest Brrtnrrnii. And so we shall. What say the rest of you, kind sirs?

Yes, let us begin, and be on our guard. Oh, yes, Dhalric, the woods of Nkokkon you say? Never heard of it. Did anyone mention any woods of Nhokkon?

The Nhokkon woods are about two hours southeast of here. The woods themselves take about two days to travel through, if you're moving at a rapid pace....three days, otherwise. And I can assure you that they are free of undead....(He smiles) I made sure of that, myself! However, there are a group of goblins that live in the Nhokkon Woods, and they charge a toll to pass through their lands. As long as you have something to give them, they usually leave you alone. They seem to prefer food and gardening equipment, for some reason. I gave them a bag of turnips and a spade the last time I passed through....

....and when I say a bag of turnips, I mean a BIG bag of turnips. It was at least fifteen pounds!
Their leader, Bloorbadoogaba, is a little....strange, though. He's a nature shaman, but he has an affinity for smoking cigars and listening to the drum and fife. Even has his own personal musicians (all goblins, of course).


Bloorbadoogaba is basically a druid, without the shape-changing abilities, and his alignment is neutral, with good tendencies, but he's a little selfish and vain.

Well then, it's good that I come along, friend Dhalric. I do have a few items that might strike the goblins' fancy in my sack here. Might there be bandits or rampsmen camped out on the road? They seem to favor quiet, wooded areas in which to pick their prey. I seriously doubt that a band of robbers could defeat us, but it is something to be aware of.

Hmmm... Perhaps I might discuss the magicks of nature with this Bloorbadoogaba.

Then I hope you speak Goblin, Noman. Bloorbadoogaba understands several languages, but he refuses to speak in anything OTHER than Goblin.
It is rumored he does speak Kobold occasionally, but that's just a rumor.

Goblin, eh?

Grobe rkakesok roerofenefshoeth ionfes sheshnesh, Dhalric.

I speak a little. The result of a colorful childhood.

Ghash nagh deshashashne Kha'rgh, Dhalric.

Or, for those of you who don't speak Goblin, "Yes, I do speak Goblin, Dhalric".

Ah...the KhaarmahaKamheleion dialect of Goblin. I haven't heard that in years! I speak the Herrgnahmeisrhhio dialect, myself.

Hashahanashe gneresheim Kha'rgh, my friends.

KhaarmahaKamheleion? I love it!

Yes, I know of the Nhokkon Woods and its goblin populace, for I have...an aquaintance...there by the name of Gobbledygook, a rather funny little fella given to bouts of loquaciously nonsensible and unintelligent verbiage. The Goblins know better than to demand any toll from me, not with Bellepherus at my side. Or beneath my thighs. As you may know their Nhokkon boots are highly treasured, made like no other footware you'd ever find anywhere else, and literally made to last decades. Why, even one old, wizened wizard friend of mine claims his are well over two centuries old. However, he's also been known to, shall we say, exaggerate quite often.

Bellepherus, I daresay, could make the Woods in less than a day, his great stride a thing to behold. Well, that is if he isn't distracted by any prey.And woe be to those he chooses as prey, or especially enemies for they have no chance to escape his clutches. Or maw. But I suppose that goes without saying, doesn't it?

Very well, the Woods it is, then. However, I fear that I'll have to rely on your help in translating their language, since I speak Goblin not. Many a time have I begged Gobbledygook to teach me and many a time has he refused me.

Sirs Lorrol and Haardi, will you both accompany us?

nervously smiling and twiddling his fingers while rapidly, repeatedly looking back and forth between Khistra and the men

Why, yes, yes, my dear mistress. We would, uh, we would be most happy to accompany you and these fine, uh, men on your journey. Won't we, Staylen?

looking with a blank face around at nothing in particular, totally oblivious to his friend's question

a little louder

Staylen! We would be most happy to go along with these nice people on their long, hard, hazardous journey, right?

finally acknowledges Olivius

Oh, yes, Ollie. We, uh, we would be, uh... I'm sorry. What were you saying again?

whaps Staylen over the head with his funny looking round black headpiece

Thank you very much.

rolls eyes and scowls forward, as if to an invisible audience witness to the exchange between the two longtime friends

And so, with that out of the way, we take our leave.

You didn't like `Herrgnahmeisrhhio'? (Hint: Its a Duran Duran song...and OLD Duran Duran song!)

I'm going to take Greatwing and do some scouting. I'll be back soon....wait for me. He walks off. Several minutes later, he flies by on his Gryphon, then heads towards the Nhokkon Woods.

Well, I was trying to figure it out but now that you've given me the best clue, yes, it's Her name is Rio, from the song, Rio, isn't it? The g threw me. And how funny that you mentioned a gryphon, because I meant to have Khistra sarcastically tell the men that if they could sprout wings then flying would be an alternative means of getting to Silvercliff instead of going the short, dangerous way or the long, safer one, but I forgot.

For those of you who may not know I must warn you that many a...

she began, as she mounted her crouching tiger

...hidden dragon has been known to lie in some of the most unsuspecting, innocent looking places, so always be prepared and ready to expect the unexpected.

Geez, I have so-o-o been wanting to use that all day!

"Rio"??? Hahaha! You're right, the "g" threw me off as well. Oh dear, now I shall have to make clever language puns.

Hidden dragons, eh? I haven't the pleasure of meeting one yet. Some say that the greater dragons can speak and perform magic. Only the greatest gladiator can defeat these. Do they often come down the forest road? One would suspect with all the traffic here they would be fearful.

(The party passes a confectionery trader, his wagon leaking chocolate onto the road.)

Of course, one of my best teachers, Aaron Brrok O'veetch, one claimed that dragons were extinct, expelled from the settled areas by skilled dragon-hunters. I suppose we shall see whether that is true...

`Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon'. eh? Good one. Still haven't seen the movie yet. Khistra\Caractacus, if you have read the early parts of the first board, you would know Dhalric has a gryphon for a mount. He used it when the group left the town they started in!

A few minutes later, Dhalric comes back. His gryphon, Greatwing, lands in front of the party. Dhalric doesn't bother to dismount.

Bad news....a group of soldiers are heading toward the Goblins, and it looks as if they mean to wipe the Goblins out. I need either Keeran or Cascerot to come with me and head them off. I'd prefer both, but Greatwing can only carry one other, besides myself. Who will it be?

Allow me to come, friend Dhalric. Mayhap I can settle this without bloodshed.

Well, Keeran, it looks like we're heading into danger. Perhaps while Noman and Dhalric are taking care of this matter, you can tell me a little more about yourself. As I am leader on this quest, I think I should make you my second-in-command.

Why thank you, friend Bowen. Myself? I am a wanderer, I travel the length and breadth of the land, looking for adventures, treasure and the like. I am from the west, across the Great Sea Elantaic, which few men have been able to cross. I grew up in a small village in Northern Emareca. It was a peaceful, boring existence, and I knew there were far better things outside my little town. So as soon as I came of age, I packed up what few things I had, said farewell to my family, and started my long journey.

(Keeran's expression becomes distant, and faintly sad)

It has been...quite a long time since I have seen my family. Quite a long time...

(Suddenly the nostalgic look fades, and the mischievous, smiling expression comes over Keeran's face again. He looks back to Bowen.)

And where do you hail from, Sir Knight?

`Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon'. eh? Good one.
Thank you. I thought so.
Khistra\Caractacus, if you have read the early parts of the first board, you would know Dhalric has a gryphon for a mount. He used it when the group left the town they started in!
Umm, yes...I'd forgotten about that until much later.

Khistra gently strokes the black and orange fur beneath her thighs, casually looks around at the men, idly listening to their friendly exchange, and wondering if she should offer her assistance, or just wait to see if anyone requests it. She admires the gryphon, Greatwing, eliciting a low growl from Bellepherus, whose great and mysterious powers of perception are beyond the ken of mere mortal men.

I am from the village where you first met me. I often go on quests, for weeks, sometimes months, and I always have a long and interesting tale when I return. I dwell in a small hovel near the tavern, as indeed every place to live is in that village. Everyone at the tavern knows my name, except for outsiders who drop by, but they are very rare. smiles Of course, they could all come when I'm out on one of my missions!

notices Bellepherus' ears prick up at a sound the men's haven't quite detected yet. In a low whisper she says to him

What is it, boy? What do you hear?

then she hears it, too.

Shh. Listen, everyone. I can't quite make out what it is but it sounds like...wings.

a light fluttering sound

Something's flying this way. Two somethings, by the sound of it.

begins to break out in a light sweat

W-wings, my dear? Wings from uh, w-what? Perhaps some birds?

No, kind Sir Olivius. Too large for the breeds of birds that live around here. It's getting louder.

Now notices two other sounds.

eep! eep! meep! meep!

It's not like anything I've ever heard around here before.

The sounds get closer.

From above appear two small winged forms, coming down in curiosity for a closer look at the small entourage. By the unmistakable shape of their wings, slim bodies and tails and the movements of their flight Khistra quickly realizes that her suspicions were correct. These flying creatures were in fact...

DRAGONS! But dragons don't live around here! Where did they come from?

Notices the men, with the exceptions of Lorrol and Haardi, who look around for a place to hide, ready for battle, and then suddenly notices something odd about the dragons, just as they drop down to her level and fly around her head, making their strange tittering amongst themselves. eepeep! meepeep!

They're...small! I've never seen such small dragons, or even knew that they could be so small! Stay your weapons. I don't think they mean us any harm.

Waves arms around slowly to fend off the dragons.

Out from behind some bushes the group was passing comes a man of normal stature, with a husky build and very strong arms, and dark, scraggly hair in dire need of a good washing, as was his clothing.

Indeed they don't, my beautiful young lass. They're new to this area and are just curious about their new surroundings.

But please forgive me my rude manners and allow me to introduce myself. I am Bonno, a wayward cook without a cauldron to my name. You've already met my pet Peeves, although sometimes I wonder just which of us is really the pet. Their names are Eep and Meep, so-called for the sounds they make, as well as the fact that I'm not very imaginative when it comes to pet names. Eep is the female and has a slightly higher voice than Meep, the male. They're called Peeve dragons, as they come from a great and wondrous mountain range of the same name leagues away from here, the Peeve Mountains.

They're actually very friendly little creatures, as you can see with Eep, who has apparently taken a liking to your friend there.

Points to Eep, trying to perch on Lorrol's shoulder, who's not used to having dragons of any size try to be friendly with him.

Fear not, sir. She won't hurt you. See? She rather fancies you. Just let her perch on your shoulder or arm.

Lorrol calms down enough to try, putting his arm up. Eep settles on it, and then snuggles her cheek to Lorrol's, which slowly begins to form into a sheepish smile. Meep settles on one of Bonno's shoulder, and idly rests his tail on the opposite one, lazily moving it back and forth.

Would it be too much to kindly ask to join you folks? I noticed that you were headed in the general direction that I am. I don't know if you need a cook but even so I could help in that capacity as needed. You may enjoy some of my recipes, and I won't be any bother to you.

Greetings, friend Bonno. Noman Gilinde Erchamion am I, a Bard of the harp. I and these diverse companions are on a quest.

Note to Khistra's Author. Don't assume EVERYONE jumps into the bushes. Not everyone is afraid of everything. Noman's been around quite a bit... While he maintains a healthy respect for dragons, he's not stu-pid enough to jump into the bushes like that. I assume also that some of the others might take a bit of umbrage at that conceit as well. P.S. Yes, I know I could have done this on the discussion board, but I thought it was important enough to put here.

I am Sir Bowen, and this youth here is Bob, my squire.

Note to Khistra's author: I agree with Noman's author. Dhalric isn't afraid of anything...well, almost....but, I'm not going to tell you what he IS afraid of.

And I am Dhalric Blacksilver, of the Dark Hunter's guild.

And my name is Keeran. Pleased to make your aquaintence.

Dhalric: Snakes?

Keeran: Dhalric isn't Indiana Jones, but thanks for playing.


I need to find some food for my gryphon, Greatwing. Did I mention he's a vegetarian?

Dhalric begins looking around for edible plants. However, he doesn't stray from within view of the others.

I never meant to suggest that anyone jump into the bushes, other than Lorrol and Haardi, who aren't the bravest of men, but now I see how that passage could be misinterpreted that way, given the placements of the commas. It should've been put into parentheses: (with the exceptions of Lorrol and Haardi, who look around for a place to hide), to separate their actions from the rest of the men's. I meant to say that Bonno was passing through the bushes that I imagined the group passed. I imagine the landscape just outside the town we left to be a flat plain with hills nearby and mountains in the far distance, with a bright blue sky, and trees and bushes placed here and there, some in clumps of various sizes (like where Bonno emerged from) and others alone, and the group is following a rather well-worn path or road. If it's different from that in any way, please enlighten me, ok? Or is it pretty open to each author's imagination?

Giggles at the playfulness of the diminutive dragons, circling around in the air, especially Eep, as she focuses most of her attention on Lorrol, receiving some childish laughter from him.

Well, so much for stories of fearsome dragons in these parts. There's plenty of vegatation between here and Silvercliff, Sir Dhalric, so Greatwing surely won't go hungry. And if we'll need anymore pack animals later on we can stop by Ahrthirr's Camel Lot, about a week away. He usually has quite a nice selection to choose from, and his prices are fair. He'll take money or trade.

If anyone wants or needs extra weapons then next to Ahrthirr's is an excellent forgesmith who specializes in all manners of arms, if you don't mind buying from a woman, and a former warrior woman, at that. Her name is Britnii, spears amongst her most treasured assets.

sneering

pfft! They're fake.

Not according to those who know her and her...body of work. I, for one, have a few of her arms, which I carry on long trips. I don't often carry them when going to town, for instance, since I have a far greater weapon with me at all times.

Smiles and strokes Bellepherus' fur. The big cat turns his head into Khistra's fingers, closes his eyes and purrs.

By the way, folks, thank you all for your kind greetings. I apologize, my young beauty, but I stand by my feelings for your friend. I also did not get your name.

I did not give it. But I am Khistra, the Tiger Maiden. This is my constant companion, Bellepherus. I'll warn you that he is very overly protective of me.

Not to fear, my dear Khistra. Your virtue is safe from me.

I don't approve of Britnii's Spears. But, I wonder is she is any relative of Brrtrnii?

What? What's going on? Why don't you aprove? I don't understand!

Khistra tilts her head, long lustrous golden tresses falling slowly onto one shoulder, squints and wryly smiles at Bonno.

And why, praytell, do you assume that I am virtuous?

Never mind, Bob. I've heard of her, and that horrible din she makes in her line of work.

Yes, Sir Bowen. I didn't expect anyone to be posting at this time, so I didn't see your posts before I began this one here.

Before Bonno can answer, from Khistra's saddle horn comes an angry voice.

You would do very well not to speak so of my daughter, you confounded scoundrel! I raised that girl right, and then when she was of age I let her join a ferocious tribe of warrior women. She left a frightened little girl and came home a fierce and proud warrior, although...

suddenly becoming a little sad

...a wounded one. She nearly died. The warrior women couldn't keep her anymore, she was too much of a liability, so she had to use her talent with weapons to live on in other ways, and the forge was the best way she found. It's worked out quite well for her, too.

becoming serious again

And do not think that she's helpless in self-defense, either. She could still cleave your head in two if she has to!

That's fine with me, sir. I'm not really a fighter anyway, though I can do pretty well to a certain extent if need be.

1 Bad Karma point to Khistra for invoking `She Who Shall Not Be Named!!' (Britney Spears, who has the perfect initials, don't you think?)

Isn't Britnii's place next to the greenhouse run by the former Paladin, Axel? Axle's Roses are considered to be the best in the entire realm. Some even say they have magical qualities. My....acquaintance, Allara, says Axel's son, Omyne, is really a sweet child, but I've never met him!

Dhalric pauses, takes a drink from his waterskin, then continues....

I met Axel's brother, Gunzen, once, but I've never had the privilege of meeting Axel himself. According to the stories, Axel was a valiant warrior who fought in several battles, and quite a few wars. He was usually accompanied into battle by his pet leopard, Spotstriker. Unfortunately, rumor has it that Axel lost his left leg in battle against a horde of Trolls, and his leopard suffered a traumatic injury, which left it deaf. Apparently Axel's mother was a botanist, and she trained him in botany when he was a lad, so he took that trade up after he retired. That was about fifteen years ago, if I remember correctly. Gunzen's still active as an adventurer. He's a ranger, but, unfortunately, not a Dark Hunter, like myself.

Why doesn't Discus allow apostrophes in our headings? "Brrtnrrnii's head" is always spelled with one but it doesn't appear when I preview or post under that heading.

Yes, Axle's Roses. My favorite flower. A man can truly win my heart with those...if only Bellepherus would let him!

Rubs her hand rapidly back and forth for a second or two through the fur on the cat's head in a playful manner. He purrs in delight.

Should we not continue on our quest? You must remember, we must recover this Heart quickly, or the consequences may be unbearable!

Britnii has a girlfriend from their days as warrior women, J'Lo, a smallish but pretty girl, with long light brown hair, slightly dark complected skin, bosom a tad small, and rump a tad plump but not overly so. A nice handful, if I may be so bold. But she's meaner than she looks, as all warrior women are. She's killed many a man and would easily kill many more given the right circumstances. She'd be a valuable asset to our trip, if she could be persuaded to leave my beautatious daughter long enough, but I make no promises.

J'Lo originally hails from the land of Bo'Daishiss, where all their women are beautiful. Ah, what a site it is to see, too. A veritable sea of vast beauty everywhere you look and as far as the eyes can see. Once you've been with a Bo'Daishiss woman you'll never want one from anywhere else. I could go on and on but I am tired for the moment and need to rest now. Khistra, would you please cover me with a dark cloth?

She does.

Thank you.

I'm sorry that I forgot about the verboten name, but hey, it just seemed like a good idea at the time.

I have heard of this smith Britnii. It is said that she has a nemesis, another woman of the same tribe, Krstena Egliria. Some say they are blood enemies, but others say that is an idle rumor. Anyway...

Perhaps we can stop by and see an old friend of mine, goes by the name of Caentanna. He is a bard of exceptional skill, although he is getting a bit on in years. He and another singer, Robe Tomas, usually hang around the town of Grrami not far from here, where they have a tavern. Although it might be a bit too far out of our way.

Yes, I've heard that one insipid song they sing together over and over and over ad infinitum. It seems wherever I go, there it is. It's enough to make my ears bleed! But they do make a great mead!

The small group comes upon a woods, and a rather large one by the looks of it. They hadn't gone too far inside of it when they see a most unusual site: a human in knight's clothing and with three heads, all of which were in a heated discussion when they all noticed the small assemblage before them.

Head 1: Nee!
Head 1&2: Nee! Nee! Nee! Nee! Nee!

a little perplexed

Who are you?

Head 1: We are the Knights Who Say...Nee!

mockingly

No! Not the Knights Who Say Nee!

looks at the others with her and trying not to smile, then back at the "knights"

Head 1:The same!
Head 3: Uh, no, we're not.
Head 1: Yes, we are.
Head 3: No, we're not. I've changed my mind. I don't want to be a knight that says, "nee" anymore.
Head 1: Wha-at? But you must!
Head 3: No. I've made up my mind. Now I want to be the Knight Who Says, "Neener!"
Head 1: But you can't do that!
Head 3: I just did! Neener! Neener! Neener!
Heads 1&2: Ow! Ow! Ow! Agh! Stop it!
Head 3: Neener! Neener! Neener!
Heads 1&2: No! No! Stop it! We can't take anymore!
Head 3: I shall say "neener" again to you if you do not appease me.
Head 1: Well, what is it you want?
Head 3: I want to say, "neener" whenever I want!
Heads 1&2: No!
Head 3: Neener! Neener! Neener!
Heads 1&2 Please! Please! No more! We will let you say "neener" whenever you want!
Head 3: Thank you. And you folks may pass.

Thank you.

and when they're past, to the rest of the group she says

What an odd person. Er, people. Er, whatever.

No more Monty Python and the Holy Grail references (or rip-offs) please, or I'll unleash the Spanish Inquizition....AND NO ONE EXPECTS THE SPANISH INQUIZITION!!!

But would they if you had spelled it correctly?

I was half-asleep when I made that post, so sue me! I think I had a game show called `Inquizition' on my mind......

That's nothing...yuo should see meet the Knights who say `Nay'! They disagree with everyone...even themselves!

Yes, and they ride horses that say "neigh". Oh, that's right. All horses say, "neigh", don't they?

smiles

Anybody like foreign and exotic animals? If we have time we could always visit the Kalama Zoo on the way to or from our destination. And does any of you play any wind instruments? Near Ahrthirr's Camel Lot is a fabulous maker of them. In fact, I've got one with me here somewhere.

twists around on Bellepherus' back, looks inside her belongings, finds what she's looking for

Yes, here it is, my...

Bharhnee Fife! Yes, I love those! Bharhnee makes the greatest, most melodic wind instruments in all the lands! Big, small, and anywhere and everywhere in between, they're the most treasured for their sweet sounds. Please, Khistra, play for us, won't you?

Well...

dips her head and smiles in mock modesty

...sure. All right. If you really want to hear it. I don't play very often, so I may be a little off-key.

proceeds to play a tune as soft and sweet as her voice is pure, the soothing melodies infiltrating the ears and minds of the men with her, relaxing their very beings as one. Likewise Bellepherus, who squints his eyes in enjoyment of the pleasant lilt, which lasts for several minutes without the slightest negative variance in pitch

Very nice, Khistra. But `Is anyone interested in exotic animals?' I'm a Ranger! Does that answer your question? As for Kalama....Isn't that where they have the horse racing track? I know a horse-owner named Jhonn. He has a black mare named Shhaft that he enters into races there about this time of year. The horse runs better on dirt than on muddy tracks. You could say that Jhonn's Shaft is one bad mudder...(Someone yells `Shut yo mouth'. Dhalric looks around.) Just talkin' bout Shhaft!


Been waiting to use that one for awhile! Go over to the TKOS discussion board after you read this. I've got a couple questions to ask, and something to say....

Khistra, I should play so badly.

smiles playfully at her

Not bad.

Noman picks up his harp, and begins to improvise a duet with Khistra.

Since we now have Chapter 3, how about closing this one's Add a Message feature so that no one else posts anymore here to avoid any continuity or other problems, ok? I'll post only there now, until other consecutive chapters are created.