The new board's unwrapped and set up. Come on in!

Just think... one more board and the LICC becomes Extra Large!

I'm ready. I brought the lightsaber Crimson gave me.

Double-Bladed lightsaber, to be exact.

Whoops. Shoulda posted here.

By Unexpected plot Twist on Friday, July 06, 2001 - 10:46 pm:

"Captain," The Senator begins, "I'm afriad that I've arrived too late for most of what I needed to tell you. What I can say for certain is that shortly after I leave, I will doubtless be killed. I have information in my pocket Captain, that is evidence of a massive conspiracy throught EarthSysGov, going as high as the Joint Cheifs. I don't what it's for entirely, but I knopw why the Sslrth are targetted. They have a metal on their planet, that, once refined by a top of the line process developed by TerrSec can act as a natural cloak." Tacoman looks slightly amazed. "Think of the consequences Captain. A ship that can be hidden and yet still eb able to raise sheiulds and fire weapons. The Sslrth do not know what they're sitting on, and doubtless they would be skeptical of any atempt to mine there, especially after what the Whyte Kastles did to them." Senator Marrabelle looked around. "Captain, I fear that the President may be a pawn in a galactic conspiracy, to turn the Earth government into a Despotism."

The conversation goes on for a few more minutes, in which Marabelle presents a photo copy of plans for an occupation of the Sslrth homeworld. She leaves. The Captain escorts her to the shuttle bay. As she climbs in, Tacoman doesn't notice the vile evil grin coming from the shuttle's pilot.

As Tacoman enters the bridge, kiehart and Adon seem to be discussing something. Rikard is at his post. Milkshake is situated in the Captain's chair. Tacoman watches the screen as the Senator's shuttle flies away. "Commander, contact the shuttle and-" Suddenly he's interupted by a distress call from the shuttle. "Help! We're being attacked by the LICC! This is diplomatic shuttle number 551-" The signal cuts abruptly. Tacoman stares at the viewscreen in amazment. The shuttle is perfectly fine. Suddenly a blast of enrgy comes from below the Spidership and incinerates the shuttle. The viewscreen stays fixed, as a crudely constructed, and obviously poorly designed, but aesthetically identical to the Spidermobile 3, lances away at low warp. The bridge crew is shocked into silence. A beep indicating a "special report" from GNN is coming in. But they don't need to see it. Kiehart and Tacoman and Milkshake exchange glances. Milkshake speaks first. "Barring the off chance that some kid with a high powered microscope was looking at this area at that moment, the people of Earth just saw us assassinate a Senator." Warning lgiths flash. A half dozen small Earth warships are convergin on the Spidership. Kiehart looks at Tacoman. "Sir? I think now might be a good time to go the Sslrth."

Hey! The shuttle must've had bad guys then!

Oh, what a lovely situation. Well. We can leave, and cement the idea that we're outlaws, or give ourselves up, attempt to explain, and endure months of court-martials, stress, and shame.

Or...

Helm, Two-Five-Six by One-Eight-Nine Warp 7 Engage! Ops, prepare tractor beams! Spidermobile to Earth Patrols, we have been set up! We are persuing the ship that fired on the shuttle. Computer, compile all sensor readings from the last 10 minutes and transmit to the closest Earth ships. Transmit current sensor readings in real-time to the patrol ships. Helm, time to intercept?

"45 seconds, Commander."

Stand by on tractor beams.

Milkshake turns around.

Captain, didn't see you there. Your command, of course.

General Burdukis is fuming mad, when his 'friend' walks in, smiling. Burdukis slams his fist on the table. "Listen you son of a •••••, I want to know right now. Did you set up that attack on the Senator?!?" The man smiles. "Why no sir. The LICC assassinated Senator Marrabelle. It was merely coincidence that she stumbled onto your littl eplan." "My little plan? Get the hell out my office now! I'm going to the Presidnet. I'm gona confess the whole thing." The General stops cold. His friend shot him with a phaser. The beam had lanced tyhrough him. He was dying. "I'm sorry General, but I can't let you do that." He drops the phaser on the ground. The phaser has LICC markings on it.

The persuing Earth ships begin firing at the Spidership. The shots are weakened by didstnace, and all but ignored by the sheilds. Kiehart holds tight onto Adon's chair out of insticnt. "Well, looks like they don't believe us."

Rocket Ranger is clearly igitated....

Captain, I must speak with you, Commander Milkshake, and the security staff in private. NOW!

Agitated, that is.

Drop a message buoy with all information we just transmitted and get us out of here! See if you can find a large but unhabited asteroid in the Belt that we can land in.
Captain Tacoman to security, meet Commander Milkshake, Rocket Ranger and myself in Conference Room #3.
Well Commander, here we go again.. running from a really, really bad situation... Oh well, we've always managed to redeem ourselves before...

Wait.. cancel the order to get away..
All stop and full power to the shields. Continue to transmit the information with a message that what we are sending is the truth, and we might be willing to be destroyed so that the universe will know the truth. If things start going bad, we can either escape, or take the escape pods.
Open a channel.
This is Captain Tacoman. I know that you received footage of what looks like the LICC destroying a Senator's shuttle, but we were set up for you to think that. We are transmitting all sensor data dealing with the event, and will continue sending this message and the data in order to show we're innocent. Tacoman out.

Rocket Ranger and the others enter Conference Room #3. RR activates a video monitor that drops down from the ceiling, and he begins typing something on a keypad. The footage of the shuttle's destruction plays on the screen.

Gentlemen, this MUST be avenged! The Senator was one of the few Earth leaders that the Galactic Order trusted. However, this is not why I called you here.

He pauses.

As you know, I've already sent two ships to destroy one of Earth's research space stations, located in Alpha Proxima III. The destruction will appear to be caused by Earth, resulting in an upheaval that will distrupt plans for a war with the Sslrth, albeit only temporarily. I propose that this plan be used as the stepping stone to a greater plan. During the confusion that ensues, we should send a team to Earth, in disguise, to find evidence that Earth is behind all of this; the death of the Senator, the other attacks supposedly made by the Sslrth. Instead of using this evidence to clear ourselves, however, I propose sending it to the Galactic Order High Council, and letting them deal with Earth!

He pauses again.

Not a popular suggestion, but a sound one, I assure you. The High Council will deal out the justice that the corrupt leaders would otherwise escape from if the other leaders of Earth are allowed to deal with them! (He takes a short pause, then sighs and continues.) I think I should explain just exactly who I am. Its long past time for the truth to come out. My name is Quincy Kyle Rocket, and my brother Randall, the Spork Knight, is very much alive. We were born on Earth and were raised there until I was 11 and Randall was 14. Then we moved to Saturn for two years, then finally to Cylania, where we stayed until we were old enough to enlist in the Galactic Order's Defense Force. Our parents were both former law enforcement specialists turned bounty hunters. They died when I was 17, killed while trying to nab an outlaw who chose to blow his ship up, with him and them on it, rather than surrender. Randall and I were eventually transferred to a special division inside the Galactic Order, where we received training in various skills; I had an aptitude for inventing, so I was especially trained in that, while Randall was given extra training in biochemistry. We were basically trained as covert operatives. We are both still very much a part of the Galactic Order. Randall is a Captain, while I am a Lt. Commander. However, we are now a part of a special branch formed only a couple of years ago. A special ops branch, codenamed Black Gamma, and my current orders are to stop Earth by any means necessary!

Rikard watches as another Observer that he didn't understand walks off.
I've really got to work on those mental powers.
He looked over at Ansh's double-bladed lightsaber. He just didn't understand why they were so popular. He liked the single but maybe he was just a traditionalist. The Observer walks up
Observer: Found them. When I was probing their dimension, I sensed extreme danger surrounding Artsy. We should be prepared for combat, but we will not attack unless absolutely necessary. Our main objective is to get in by stealth and observe the situation. I've prepared a spell that will render us invisible to the natives' technology. Are you both ready?
Rikard: Yeah, let's go.

MISSLE LIGHTLY ARMED PATROL CAN'T EXPLODE BROADCAST

ALL YOUR BASE ARE BELONG TO US

Ok Rocket. You lead the Earth team. Pick anybody you want. I'll even go with you if you need me.

I don't like this, I don't like this at all.

Quincy, your choice of words seems to indicate that our entire planet is supporting these actions, rather than just a specific faction or conspiracy.

And you intend to destroy an entire Earth base? Surely there are men and women employed there that have no idea what intrigues and treason is being employed by this conspiracy! What is the cost in lives of this upheaval you mention?

One more thing, you must be crazy to think that Earth will submit to the Galactic Order High Council to find the conspirators. Humans are a proud people, you know that. No matter how we might wish for galactic peace, that's a long step from letting even an allied power have jurisdiction over our criminal justice system.

And I thought we were chasing the ship that blew up the shuttle. So, we're now letting it go?

YOU HAVE NO CHANCE TO SURVIVE MAKE YOUR TIME

Kiehart scoffs at Captain's suggestion. "Hide? There is a fleet of Earth ships getting ready to massacre the Sslrth! And knowing the Andafi, they'll hit the Earth fleet as hard as they can once they realize the Sslrth are in serious danger, but BOTH empires are seriously outgunned. You'd let them be slughtered just to save our reputations? Forget it. I'm taking Banshee, and I'll take on Earth all by myself if I have to. Cowrads." With that he storms away.

On Earth, the mysterious friend of Burdukis walks into his office. His uncle is waiting there. "Hello nephew. Did you deal with Burdukis?" "Yes I did Uncle. I wish I hadn't had to kill him. I'm just glad we got our hands on that official LICC weapon. Where'd you get it?" "The wreckage from the Spidership 2. They left it by accident." "Well, what's next? We got our war. We'll have all the exclusives, and front line photos. We'll be the number one news org in the galaxy! It's just what what you wanted. Do we really need to trigger the bomb in the VP's chair?" "Ah, the VP's a liability. The Pres is malleable by our people in the Joint Chiefs, but the VP has a conscience. Besides, it'll be easy to blame the Sslrth. They're a race with no experience in the field of espionage after all. And of course my magazines wil be the first to report that the bomb was Sslrth in design. Once we've dominated the market, we can just let this war go where it will. Civil wars are good for ratings after all. And the fake Spidership you got your college buddies to build was pure genius. The majority of the public is calling for Tacoman's head on a platter, and the minority that actually believes the LICC's been framed is, as usual, being ignored by the media at large, as minoirty opinions usually are." The nephew smiles. He's made his uncle proud, as he'd always tried to since his parents had died. "Thank you for this oppotunity Uncle. Conspiracies are rather fun."

-

The Earth frigate hung at the back of the fleet that was advanicng on the Sslrth homeworld, on the look out for anything odd. The sensors registered the approaching Earth ship as a friendly and ignored it. Then, the automated, crewless ship was blasted to pieces. The Johnny Greene flew ahead at breakneck speed. And not too far away, a pair of Earth War Destoryers were greeted by the Andafi fleet.

Hearing Commander Milkshake's words, Rocket Ranger sighs.

Commander, first of all, that "base" I'm talking about destroying has no innocents on it! We had a spy in there for three weeks who sent a very disturbing report in before he was reassigned. I can't tell you what exactly they're researching at that space station; you're not cleared for it. However, I can tell you that it is most definitely not medicine! The Galactic Order's Probability Computer predicted that if the research is allowed to be finished, and their findings implemented, the entire Milky Way galaxy, not just Earth's solar system, has a 98.43% chance of being devoid of all life within 8 years!

He pauses.

And I am not talking about the Galactic Order High Council weeding out the conspirators and trying them. The High Council will see to it that the evidence falls into the hands of trustworthy allies they have on Earth, allies in the Senate, who will see to it that the corruption doesn't spread and the traitors do not escape justice with the help of any allies they might have within the government or outside of it. The Galactic Order doesn't intervene in the affairs of non-member worlds if they can help it. If Earth was a member of the Galactic Order, which he hope it will be eventually, the traitors most definitely would meet justice!

He pauses again, and folds his arms.

As for the ship that destroyed the shuttle....that's your problem; I'm not in command of this ship. However, I recommend trying to capture it, or some of its crew, if possible. And Captain? I would be happy to lead the Earth team. However, as this will be a covert mission, I recommend that you remain here; you're too well known, and who knows if they'll have photos of you plastered all over the place? Plus, they would be more likely to try and kill you, instead of capture you, due to the present situation. I recommend we send a small force. Perhaps four people, and no more. I'd prefer to ask for volunteers, but I recommend that Kiehart be asked to join the team. If he can keep his temper in check, that is. I'd also like at least one Jedi on the team, if possible. Their mental powers would come in handy. It depends on who volunteers.

Captain Tacoman begins to speak, when a console in the room lights up. They investigate, and discover that the ship and its crew are now on the Earth's most wanted list.
Great, just great... I wonder if I should turn myself in and explain the situation in person.. let them scan my brain and all that to see I'm telling the truth.
Commander, do we have any reset devices or Deus ex Machina machines on board?

oh, Josh, this double lightsaber is a little too combersome, could you cut in half for me with your lightsaber? I could give the other half to my sister but she might use it to carve grafitti in the walls of the spidermobile.

The ramship returns to the Spidership. However, while it had left with Insane's vehicle attached to it, now the other ship is missing. Klassikos disembarks.

I gave Insane his ship, and some of the armor to give it more power.

The Johnny Greene strafes the Earth fleet while moving at top speed, too fast for the Earht fllet to get a solid lock. However, the Earth fleet is slowed down by the suddeness of the attack. Captain Keller orders them to continue to the Sslrth homewolrd, broadcasting a warning.

-

On Earth, the VP smells some smoke coming from his chair. He sees a small barely noticeable incision in the chair, he sees a small black bozes leaking an apparently flammable gas. He leaps out the window, thankful his office is on the bottom floor. He runs for his personal shuttle, but is thrown to the ground by the office exploding. This confirms his greatest fear. That whoever's behind the setting up of the Sslrth and the LICC wanted him removed him. He decided to hop into his craft, and warps away. Thankfully word of his "assassination" hasn't reached the fleet yet, and they let him by with no trouble. He knows only one place he can go where he's sure he'll be safe. The Spidership.

{NOTE: See? Someone believes the LICC was framed!}

-

The man behind the conspiracy laughs at the flamnes licking out the windows of the building where the VP was burning the midnight oil. Now his friends in the Joint Chiefs could manipulate that foll of a President into believing anything. Convincing him the LICC is guilty would be difficult, but it could be done. And his psycho-linguistic skills had certainly convinced everyone who read or watched his programs. Soon most if not all of ESG would be against the Sslrth and the LICC. Although he didn't doubt that there would be dissidents, maybe even in the military. He was already hearing stories about some small out-of-the-way Earth colonies protesting the invasion of the Sslrth. But they lacked the numbers and the tech to actually put up a fight. Things were going beautifully.

-

The Earth war Destroyers hung crippled in space as the Andafi fleet continued on it's intercept course. The Andfai Empress, attending the battle herself, hoped the three war cruisers that were too damaged to continue following could handle the two Earths hips if they ever got their weapons back on-line.

-

Kiehart is sweating as the Banshee shudders from going faster than she's ever gone before. He scowls as his computer panel tells him that the Earth fleet will already be at Sslrth before he gets there. He hopes that the Captain will follow him. An entire race's freedom was in the balance.

No, Ansh, you should never try to break apart a double-saber. The power systems of the two blades are interconnected, and if you slice into the battery, you may cause a nasty explosion. Here, give me that.

(Ansh hands the double-saber to Observer, who places it on his belt. He then fishes around in one of his many pockets, and produces a silvery cylinder.)

This was my Master's lightsaber. He died defeating a vile Sithlord. Please treat it with care.

(Ansh accepts it gratefully, and ignites it. The blade glows a shimmering blue-violet.)

Now, we must head back to the Terminus to access Artsy's home dimension. This way.

Tacoman notices a message from Kiehart on his console. It tells Tacoman that Kiehart has gone to help the Sslrth, and that the Spidership should follow. Tacoman, Milkshake, and Rocket go back to the bridge.
Helm, set a course for Sslrth, maximum warp. We've got a race to save.

"M'Hale" stood in the defendant balcony and made his opening remarks.
Your Honor. It is true that my client did break into a government facility and flee arrest, but all she did was create art while she was there. It is her Ka...
Here, M'Hale pauses for a moment, as if he is searching for the right phrase.
It is in her blood, making art. When the local security forces attempted to detain her for what she had done, she fled. Her art did not endanger sentient beings and it did not waste planetary resources. In fact, ever since her "crime" in the facility, the workers have been happier and more productive. If anything, she has helped to conserve planetary resources by what she has done.

"M'Hale" tosses a quick glance over the edge of the balcony before sitting down, it appears to be a sheer drop with the bottom well out of sight. He leans over and whispers to Artsy.

Well, what did you think?

This is the Interplanetary News Network with a special report.

A few minutes ago we received a diplomatic message from the mysterious Furby Empire. After nearly 1000 years of silence they want to establish diplomatic relations with the Earth government. And even more important, Great Imperator Nigel A. Furby VII. is en route to Earth to meet the President! He will arrive in a few hours. Military forces in the Earth sector are already put on high alert because of the current crisis, but this new situation will cause them to regroup and...

Suddenly there is only static noise on the channel.

Captain, shouldn't we capture the ship that assasinated the Senator? Wouldn't it be a good idea to clear ourselves by capturing the REAL murderers?

More lightsabers. Is everyone in the LICC a [CENSORED] Jedi? Can't they think of something original?

No, everyone just likes them, they're cool!

Rocket Ranger looks at Commander Milkshake.

Commander, why don't you, Wayne and Kent take the ThunderCrane and go after the imposter spidership? If that ship is a fairly accurate copy of the spidership, weapons-wise, you should have no trouble stopping it. Wayne equipped the ThunderCrane with a little something that was created in case someone ever managed to take control of the spidership. Unfortunately, it can only be used when the SnowCrane and ThunderWolf are combined.

Hey, I thought of it first. Don't get mad at me. Sure, I might have started it... Anyway, back to the story.

Rikard stared down at Ansh for a second
Did you read my mind or something? Actually Observer, with many double bladed lightsabers, cutting them in half will leave one half operational while the other end won't operate. Of course, you have been around these things a lot longer than I have so you're probably right. Of course...
He opens a small compartment in his utility belt and out drops a tooth pick sized sword. He activates a device that he has and the sword grows to it's full size.
It never hurts to have a backup weapon.

For a second Artsy stares at the lawyer who seems to have suddenly made a switch to her point of view. Then she realizes what has happened, and has to stifle a laugh. "Adon?" she whispers. "You have great timing. Did you get a chance to look at their evidence?"

"Not all of it." "M'Hale" shakes his head slowly.

Meanwhile, the voice of the prosecution has begun his opening statement. "Your Honor, the defendant has admitted to breaking into a government facility and defacing it. However, there is more to it than that, as the workers of this city well know." A hand appears, waving out over the audience below. "The removal of the gold foil from the tax agency interfered with its security system. Hundreds of millions of credits vanished off-world during that half-hour of 'art'. Evidence to support a charge of this nature was not released until yesterday, but if this trial may proceed, I believe I can satisfy Your Honor as to what really took place that day."

Shocked, Artsy jumps up. "Your Honor--!" But "M'Hale" pulls her back down. The artist, with an effort, holds her tongue.

Judge Tarelle frowns down at both balconies. "I have already reviewed the evidence for the original charges, and am prepared to pronounce sentence on that basis. However, since the defendant has chosen to alter her plea, and the prosecution wishes to present new evidence, I will view this evidence and hear from the defense before ruling." She nods to her left. "Prosecution, you may proceed."

"Can I see those pads?" Arsty whispers to Adon. "I want to know why Her Honor is prepared to condemn me on more than two charges. She hinted that earlier."

Adon frowns at her to be quiet, but passes M'Hale's pads over to her. She scans them rapidly while Adon concentrates on the viewscreen across the hall, which is showing financial records, then a diagram of the security system, and then a blurred video record of what looks like an Artsy-blur making art inside the plain but pretentious tax agency while a dark figure enters through an open window behind her.

The voice of the prosecution is narrating the importance of what is being shown, trying to link Arsty to the unknown parties who stole the taxpayers' money, but Artsy is paying no attention. She plays one short video record, then another, and then plays them again. Then she frantically taps Adon's shoulder and shows them to him.

In one, a small historic building is torn to the ground by someone or something moving too fast for humanoid sight. For one second it comes to rest and Artsy's face is clearly visible. In the second, a grove of trees within the city is burned and the ashes rise into sculpted waves and curves faster than should be possible. "These are supposed to support the first 2 charges! I do not remember them, that was not me!"

Before he can stop her, Artsy interrupts the prosecution's well-ordered speech. "Your Honor, these video records have been tampered with. I fully admit to 'decorating' the tax agency, but I do not destroy! I only create. That was not me!"

sorry for the massive post. i got inspired. the next one will be soon, and definately shorter.

Ojanon happens upon Observer, Ansh, and Rikard, and overhears Rikard....

Cutting a double-bladed saber in half is a tricky proposition!

Everyone looks at him.

Yes, my order doesn't carry lightsabers at all, but we are still trained in their use, and know much about their construction. Better to defend yourself against one by learning how to use them! (He pauses.) If you cut a double-bladed saber in half, one of three things will happen, and there is no way to predict which:

1. One of the sabers will work, but the other will be useless.
2. Neither saber will work; the weapon is completely destroyed.
3. The crystals will destabilize, resulting in a small explosion the first time the saber is activated.

In my opinion, Ansh should not have been given a double-bladed saber in the first place. They take years to master. Longer than it takes to master a single-bladed saber. (He pauses, then holds out his hand.) May I examine the weapon in question, please? I want to determine its craftsmanship.

Craftsman? I thought double-bladed lightsabers where made by Black & Decker?

(The Vice-President's speeder passed through the mouth of the gorilla nebula and passed dangerously close to the twin black holes inside)

...47 bottles of beer on the wall, 47 bottles of beer, take one down pass it around...

(he stops singing as he glances at the scanners)

Well, he's still following. Is he from TerrSec or some other group?

Computer: Insufficient evidence to make an identification.

Oh, well. Are there any dangerous space phenomena between us and the last known location of the Spidermobile?

Computer: The flaming Meteoroids of Pythar & the dimensionally unstable region known as the Sargasso of Space are almost in a direct line.

Excellent! I've always wanted to see those up close.

And just enough time to make a call before we get there.

(While the speeder continues onward Mr. Absurd steps next door to the New Menace universe and sends a coded message to R at the Psuedoscience lab and returns)

Even if they do manage to intercept that transmission I'd like to see them understand that message.

...46 bottles of beer on the wall, 46 bottles of beer...

Ok.. Rocket, get your team together and go to Earth. Cancel the order to go to the Sslrth homeworld and continue looking for the ship that attacked the shuttle. But we do need to send a ship to help Kiehart... Commander, go with Rocket's idea.

I wonder.. would there be any way we could go back in time and either try to stop the duplicate Spidership or rescue the Senator?

Certainly.

(Observer unclips the double-saber from his belt and hands it to Ojanon.)

Ojanon, what exactly are you doing here in the Observer Realm? You should know that if you are not an Observer, the only reason you could possibly be here is if a respected Observer brought you in as a guest. Who's your sponsor?

WE SHOULD SET THEM UP THE BOMB. FOR GREAT JUSTICE, TAKE OFF EVERY ZIG.

Infernal God 1: Wait, stop the memory flow. Is this Shirkaron guy still alive?

Donna: well, Yes.

Infernal God 2: This isn't good. An immortal is worse than your case.

Infernal God: Bring Shirkaron to us and we will return you to life. We'll give you a form.

Donna: No, I hope you aren't thinking about that. I'm not wearing facepaint •••••••••! Present company excluded.

Infernal God: Well, we did just see spawn...

Donna: That's your fault. Fine I'll wear the mime outfit.

Ojanon, who has his mask off, by the way, smiles. He then examines the lightsaber while speaking.

An Observer named Aelstarus Kron'ak. I met him about one hundred and thirty-two years ago. This is actually the third time I've been here. The last was over seventy-six years ago.

He examines the lightsaber closer.

What's this? (He notices a small triangular-shaped, teal-colored button, which the others either didn't notice, or mistook for simply ornamentation. He presses the button, and the double-bladed saber separates into TWO single-bladed sabers.) Ah-ha! I'm not surprised! Whoever designed this weapon was a genius. Two sabers connected together, instead of one weapon, but disguised to make it hard to notice.

Judge Tarelle turns a stern glare on Artsy. "The defendant will refrain from speaking until the prosecution has finished."

"That's all right, Your Honor," the voice of the prosecution says. "I believe you see what we are driving at. You have the witness's statements in front of you. The prosecution maintains that Artsy-Fartsy was and is a threat to the well-being of this planet, and recommend the maximum allowed punishment for her crimes."

Tarelle turns to Artsy again. "Very well. What do you have to say before I pass sentence?"

Artsy swallows hard, trying to keep her voice steady. "Your Honor, I do not remember the events that the prosecution rests their case on. I do remember walking into the tax agency and deciding it was far too dull in appearence inside, and tastelessly gaudy outside. I balanced the artistic scheme. But I did not help steal money from my people, nor did I ever destroy in order to create."

Artsy held up the hand with her ring on it. "I presume you have my medical history in front of you as well. I was wearing this ring in all the video clips, and believe my memory can indeed be trusted. I will happily make restitution for what I did do, if the court deems it necessary, but if you condemn me on this evidence alone, you will be perpetrating a gross injustice."

There is a short pause. Then Judge Tarelle stands and raises both hands. "In view of both statements, and the evidence I have viewed before and during this trial, I rule that Artsy-Fartsy is guilty of breaking, entering, and defacing government property, and fleeing arrest. For this she is sentenced to 20 chronolinks of confinement and some form of community service."

Her cool eyes drifted down to Artsy and "M'Hale", and her next words are hesitant but clear. "I must also find Artsy-Fartsy guilty in the other two charges--unfortunately for you I did have the videos tested and they were not tampered with. The sentence for these is an additional 190 chronolinks. You may appeal this ruling within the next 12 hours, but I warn you, I see no reason to reverse it." She claps her hands; the sound echos through the room. "Next case."

Artsy feels panic starting to build within her. "210 chronolinks?! Adon, you've got to figure something out. I can't live through that!"

"How long is 210 chronolinks?" the Wanderer asks.

"The rough equivalent of 210 days, but it refers to the form of punishment: solitary confinement. The room accelerates the person's time perception, so it might only be a few weeks your time, but there is nothing to do, no need for actual food, and I don't even have my art right now to help me get through 2/3 of a Terran year completely alone!" She shudders. "It's effective, and keeps the prisons clear, but I don't want to go there...."

Suddenly Artsy jumps up again. The guards have opened the door behind the balcony. "You've made a mistake!" she shouts. "I am not guilty!" Then Artsy turns, bursts between the guards, and tears off down the dim corridor.

Very well, time is wasting. We need to leave. You can trace my spell and follow us, if you wish. We are going to help Artsy. I should be able to place us very close to her. Now, this magic, in addition to tunneling us across dimensions, should render us invisible. Stay calm, everyone.

(Oberserver closes his eyes, and abruptly, himself, Ansh, and Rikard disappear with a popping noise.

Artsy is tearing down the corridor, desperate to get away from the kangaroo court. She looks behind her to check for persuers, and doesn't notice the odd popping noise directly in front of her. She then runs headlong into something invisible yet solid. She rebounds off the invisible barrier, and lands heavily on the ground. At the same time, an "oof" and a thudding noise is heard. From the ground, Observer remarks dryly,)

It worked perhaps TOO well...

(Several guards barrel down the hallway and spot Artsy, lying stunned on the floor. They charge...)

Oh great. Uh um. Okay let's see. She's not the one you're looking for.
The guards stop. They heard a voice but no one else is in the corridor. Rikard tries mind trick again.
She's not the one you're looking for.
Guard #1: She's not?
Rikard: She went the other way.
Guard #2: She went the other way?
Rikard: You're gonna let her go.
Guard #3: We're gonna let her go?
Rikard: You shoule go get her now.
Guard #4: Yeah we should.
Two of the guards bend down and grab Artsy. Another guard points his gun to where the strange voice came from
Rikard: Well so much for that.
He moves over as the guard fires into thin air.

Ansh ignites her lightsaber
Get away from her!

(A black bird flies in the spidership and morphs into Donna, wearing black, with white facial makeup and black tear lines. Her hair is also black.)

She turns to Tacoman and says Truth be known, this outfit sucks, I need more color. Oh well, I am here to sleep, I am here to fight and here to brood. I also write bad poetry and must hunt down Shirkaron, and throw him into a black hole I guess. I must work on my vendetta.

(A strange cat appears behind Artsy and Observer)

I am Hobo Kat, I shall aid you in your war agaist those keystone cops.

(Takes out a bomb and lights it and prepares to roll it down the hall)

Ojanon appears, fully visible to the guard and the others.

I don't suppose you'd like to surrender now, and save us the trouble of fighting, would you?

The guard fires again. This time the beam from his weapon hits something: Ojanon's raised right hand! However, instead of hurting Ojanon, the beam reflects off his hand and strikes the guard's weapon, destroying it!

Tsk tsk! Now I suppose I'll have to beat some sense into you! (Ojanon reaches into his robes and pulls out his Malchite Staff, which extends to full size.) Don't worry. I'm not going to kill you. After all, you can't question a corpse!

Gothic Donna Lv. 35. Undead Plus.

Hobo Kat Lv. 65. Animatian.

Adon reaches Artsy's unconscious form and sees Ojanon, the guard, and a stunned Artsy. Still in his M'Hale disguise, he steps between Ojanon and the guard.

Please, there is no need for violence here.

There is the soft hiss of a hypospray, and the guard passes out. M'Hale's image flickers between him and Adon for a second, and then stays in the M'Hale form.

You really should be more careful flaunting your powers like that. It could attract unwanted attention.

Adon nods towards The Observer's, Rikard's and Ansh's invisible forms.

It's good to see you three here. Or rather, not see you here. Have you come to watch the trial?

The Earth ships hit the Sslrth homeworld fast. Several major cities were leveled. Then one of the Earth cruisers blows to shreds. The Johnny Greene and a group of Sslrth ships are engaging the Earth fleet with all the firepower they can muster.

Kiehart's fighter drops out of warp and imediately begins firing on the rear most Earth ship. The Earth carriers begin launching fighters.

(Observer dissolves the invisibility spell.)

Not to watch it, to intervene if necessary. What's the situation here? It must not have gone too well if you decided to exit the premises, Artsy.

(Just then, 5 blaster bolts streak down the hallway toward the heroes. Observer ignites his saber in a blink of an eye, deflects two of the bolts, Adon catches one harmlessly in his hand, and Ojanon takes care of the others with his staff. An alarm sounds.)

"THE PRISONER IS ESCAPING. ALL GUARDS TO JUDICIAL SECTOR 3. THE PRISONER HAS ARMED ACCOMPLISES. TERMINATE WITH EXTREME PREJUDICE."

Perhaps we SHOULD vacate the premises.

Artsy sits up, looking dazed. "Observer? Rikard? Ansh?!" She rubs her head gingerly. "What--? What's going on?"

The alarm sounds again, and Artsy's eyes go wide. "Oh ••••. Can we get out of here? Or at least find someplace to hide?" Unnoticed by her, the artist has turned bright blue with fear.

She ducks as more blaster bolts come sailing down the corridor, then jumps up. "Let's get out of here!"

Certainly! You all go ahead, I'll defend our rear!

(The team runs down the hallway, Observer staying behind, picking off blaster shots headed their way. They charge past a surprised baliff in the lobby, and make it out into the open air. Unfortunately, the courthouse opens onto a large courtyard, surrounded by high walls, with guard towers on top. Several very large weapons mounted in the towers rotate to aim at our heroes. Observer runs out into the courtyard to join the team, followed by several angry guards. He joins the group, which by now is stopped in the middle of the yard. The three lightsaber-equipped heroes stand ready to deflect any weapons fire, Ojanon stays close to Artsy, brandishing his staff, and "M'hale" watches the guards, warily, holding his PADD. Strangely enough, he grips it as if it were...a sword.)

"ATTENTION INTRUDERS. YOU ARE ALL UNDER ARREST. SURRENDER OR BE DESTROYED."

Maybe now would be a good time to make us invisible again, Observer.

From out of nowhere several guards are blasted from behind, then The Funky Horror fires at two towers, simultaneously, one with his gun & the other with beams from his eyes. Then he grabs another guard with his freakishly strong tentacle and throws him into some of the other guards.

This distraction is enough to allow his cat Aztiram time to leap onto Artsy's shoulder & with its prehensile tail grab, some hair before leaping off and running to The Funky Horror.

As the guard towers refocus their aim toward him, he smiles and warps the space/time continuum, which affects the dimension-hoppers like fingernails on a chalkboard and inexplicably causes Ojanon's hair to revert to its spiky, Saiyan shape, and he disappears before the tower guns blast the ground where he stood.

The LICC Universe. A few years ago I never even heard of it. In the past year I've been here three times, all of them involving this universe's namesake.

Now, apparently they've gone too far & have to be brought to justice.

That's my job. I'm a bounty hunter.

I don't know where Mr. Smith, the sleezy government official, got my name & contact info, but it doesn't matter as long as he can pay my fee.

Smith gave me some devices designed to counteract the LICC's weapons & some of the member's superpowers. I sent Friday to pick up some additional artillery & back-up.

I've never gone after a superpowered squad before. I look forward to the challenge.

(Between Here & There)

Oh, like wow! Where am I? This place is like totally gnarly!

What am I doing here? This is supposed to GBS HQ.

(Patricia sees another person wearing a red-hooded cloak facing away from her)

You! Are you responsible for redirecting me here?

(The figure turns around and Patricia sees herself as a bleached blonde with oversized breasts & a skimpy outfit under the cloak)

Like, I don't know. Hey! You look like me before I fixed myself up, ya know?

Oh, no! Not another dimensional counterpart!

Like, my name's Soyburger Pattie. What's yours?

Soyburger Patricia. (she said icily) What are you doing here?

Just groovin' out, seein' the sights, you know. What do you call this place?

The LICC Universe.

(snickers) The Lick Universe. Ohmygawd, why does it have such a rude name?

Not Lick, LI... L, I, C, C. It's short for the League of Intergalactic Cosmic Champions.

What a lame name. I belong to the Superlative Union of Cosmic Champions. Also known as...

I don't care. Why don't you go back to your dimension now. There's already one of me here and we don't need any more.

Well, like you're the rudest me I ever met, why I have a mind to...

(Patricia casts a spell that sends Soyburger Pattie to another dimension) I seriously doubt that.

(from behind Patricia) Fine! Be that way! You can have this little universe all to yourself! See if I invite you to the big Dimensional Duplicates party! You only have yourself to blame for being left out!

(Soyburger Pattie disappears in a dramatic flash of light)

Good Riddance. (Patricia continues on her way)

Ops, have you been able to find the ship that destroyed the shuttle?

Scratching her head: The Funky Horror? What in space? This show gets weirder all the time....

Tactical Officer: Sir, the ships are still firing at the city in Grid 12.
Tanbakta: What? That city is no longer a threat. We don't need to completely wipe it out. Order a cease fire on that city. We don't need to kill every single Sslrth.
Tactical: Apparently they feel that they do General.
Tanbakta opens a channel to the fleet
This is Tanbakta. Don't waste your resources on that city. We don't need to kill all of them.
A transmission cuts in over Tanbakta's. It's from General Bonder.
Bonder: Belay that order. Continue the attack.
Tanbakta: Sir-
Bonder: That's an order Colonel! Follow it or you'll be relieved.
Tanbakta: Yes sir. Tanbakta out.
Tactical Officer: Orders sir?
Tanbakta: Pull the ship away from the planet. Don't fire unless fired upon.
Helm Officer: Sir?
Tanbakta: Do it.
Helm Officer: Aye sir.
The Europa pulls away from the battle.

Um, anyone know who that guy was?

Artsy rolls to avoid a burst of gunfire

Ow! No, but his pet cat-thing pulled out some of my hair. I'm going to skewer him if we get out of here alive.

She taps Adon, still inexplicably disguised as M'Hale, on the shoulder.

Can you get us out of here, or is this place dimensionally sheilded? We have to stay alive to figure out what the heck is going on!

I can get us out of here, just let me loose the losers.

With a glitter of light, Adon returns to his normal appearance. Then he makes a diagonal cut through the air. A thin gold line appears on the far wall, matching the cut through the air, almost as if a spray of gold paint came off of the end of the sword and spattered on the wall. The line quickly faded to black and the top half of the building started sliding down along the cut. A nearly invisible beam of energy cut cleanly through the building.

Adon turned towards Artsy.
Perhaps a quiet, wooded area to collect our thoughts and regroup?

Adon opened a portal and quickly ushered everyone through. When he was the last one, he stepped through himself and the portal collapsed.

Suddenly, Ojanon reappears, but is now on the bridge of the spidership. Fortunately, his hair has changed back to normal! He looks around, confused for a second. Then he walks over to the Captain.

Bad news, Captain. Observer, Ansh, Rikard, Adon and Artsy are somehow trapped in that alternate dimension! Some sort of strange creature somehow caused my hair to turn back to the Saiyan look, then cast me out of the dimension! Next thing I knew, I was back in the Realm of the Observers.
I couldn't go back to help them, so I came here instead.

He pauses.

If I could go back, that creature would get the beating of its life!

All right. I'll take along my little fighter in case we need it. Ranger, you have external docking struts on your Thundercrane, don't you?

Rocket answers in the affirmative, and Milkshake heads to the shuttle bay to get ready. 20 minutes later, the ThunderCrane, with a small tri-bladed fighter attacked to its hull, blasts off in persuit of the false Spider.

Helm, proceed to the Sslrth homeworld again, maximum warp. Ops, see if you can pick up what's going on with the battle.
Captain Tacoman to Commander Milkshake, good luck.

Well that was close!

The 128th Interceptor is always called the best of the best. And they proved it. Before the Europa broke off from the attacking fleet, the light carrier Pompeii had it's engines torn apart by the 128th when they finally entered the battle.

Kiehart is extremely careful in the battle. A good portion of the ships and fighters seem reluctant to fire on him, the Johnny Greene, or the 128th. So he limits himself to shotting down those fighters that fire with impunity. The Banshee's long range sensors register the Spidership apporaching, but Kiehart doesn't notice. The Andafi fleet is hanging back, waiting for something.

Open a hailing frequency to the Banshee.
Captain Tacoman to Kiehart, we're approaching your location. Sorry we couldn't be here earlier, but things were occuring. What can we do to help?

Tacoman covers his ears, Kiehart's yelp of joy is so loud. "Bout time boys! Here're the rules right now. The ships marked green on your radar are either Sslrth, or Earth ships who have openly switched sides. Blue, ships that have been hesitant to fire. They are to remian non-combatant until they actually power up their weapons. Red are Earth ships that have blatantly fired on us, or on the Sslrth homeworld. The Earth Flagship is a big red, becuase it singlehadedly levelled three major metropolitan areas. Purple, crippled ships. Pick up any escape pods you come across. Sound good?"

Tactical, fire on all ships that show up as red. Cripple them, not destroy them. Retrive all the escape pods you can.

Artsy-Fartsy collapses on the ground in a thickly wooded clearing, darkly leaved blue-green branches stretching high overhead. "Oh boy. Thanks, Adon. This is great." Then she turns to the others and smiles. "And thank you guys for coming after me. I appreciate it."

The artist pushes tangled white hair back from her face. "Now we just have to figure out who was behind this •••••• trial farce. I'm afraid to act on just a guess, but...." She looks pleadingly at the Wanderer. "Tell me you got copies of M'Hale's information."

No problem Artsy.
He turns to everyone else.
We're going to need some kind of evidence, hard proof would be better, that clears her name. For all we know, this government may have eliminated the very evidence that we need.

"Just what I wanted to hear, Rikard." Artsy frowns. "It seemed like the proceedings were fairly isolated. Could that mean there are either witnesses or some proof still around that could clear me? Most of the 'public' audience there was lower middle class, probably those most hurt by the money loss. Maybe they were just looking for a scapegoat and I happened to be in the wrong place at the wrong time."

(Donna's undead form)

I'm brooding. Happy.

Adon pulls out several PADDs.

This is all the evidence that was available to the courts, according to M'Hale's files. The evidence is quite heavily stacked against you. At least, the evidence that could be presented in the court.

Adon sits down on a mossy log.

If there is evidence to clear you, then M'Hale didn't have access to it. Either that, or it was inadmissible to the court. If the Government did cover the evidence up, it will be quite difficult to find it and present it. It would be impossible if the Judge is in on the conspiracy as well.

is this board closed? i'm posting on the next one, Jason....

I rule that this board is closed.

Take all further posts to a higher court... er, board.