A proper

LAST TIME ON LICC....

...for once.

Colanator and Delgado were burning the midnight oil to remodernize the ship, until their project blew up real good. Setback for all concerned, really.

Adon and a young firebrand of an officer are attempting to complete a mission out on the fringes of inhabited space, to remove an overzealous group of 'heroes'.

On the Dnar'af side...

Milkshake's group has fended off crazy little creatures and a steep well, and come off with Piece 1 of Dnar'af's treasured Sceptre. They are now on the abandoned colony world of Allyon, searching for a new piece while keeping undercover as best they can. Artsy has run across the black sheep of the colony, a small boy with startling powers.

Morgan, Alex, Rikard and Enesku have been sent to a planet with very angry weather to find another piece. M and A have discovered something very interesting regarding the history of their quest-granter, and in securing a piece of the Sceptre, gained the confidence of a sentient world.

Grant and Butrfli have found a very interesting structure on their mission-world, a research station where foolish scientists have perhaps used their shard of Sceptre for nefarious ends, endangering an innocent in the process.

The story's rolling rolling rolling, along...

"Um, hello. Uh, so, um, well. I'm not very good at these things. Do you, uh, know how long you've been here?"

Suianen looks blankely at Grant and remains silent for a moment before groggily saying "Qxatl?"

JOHNNY GOMEZ: “What happens when a superhero has to defeat another superhero’s guards? We’ll find out tonight on Celebrity Deathmatch: LICC Edition. I’m Johnny Gomez.”
NICK DIAMOND: “And I’m Nick Diamond. Tonight, we have a special guest with us. One of LICC’s authors, Jason”

The camera pulls back to reveal Jason sitting next to the pair in the announcer’s booth.

JASON: “I’m glad to be here. Nick.”

Someone in the crowd sends boos and taunts towards Jason.

MAN IN CROWD: “You ••••, Jason. You haven’t written anything funny in three years!”

Jason presses a button on the table and the man in the crowd drops through a trap door.

JASON: “Any more critics out there? I thought so. Tonight, we have Adon fighting the guard of the fortress. This should be an exciting fight, so let’s dispense with the stats and pre-fight banter.”
NICK DIAMOND: “Hey! You can’t do that!”
JASON: “I can do what I want around here, I’m the author.”

In the courtyard, referee Mills Lane approached both of them.

MILLS LANE: “All right, I want a good clean fight.”
Adon: “Who are you?”

Mills Lane slaps Adon.

MILLS LANE: “I don’t want any of your lip, son. Now LET’S GET IT ON!”

Mills Lane steps back and the fight commences.

Guard: “You shall not pass.”
Adon: “Who do you think you are, Gandalf?”

The two start trading blows.

NICK DIAMOND: “Those two are really going at it.”
JASON: “Ooh! The guard has picked up Adon and is using him as a battering ram against the wall!”

Sure enough, Adon was getting slammed repeatedly into the wall. A quick flip, and Adon ran up the wall and flipped over so he landed behind the guard. A quick kick and the Guard was slammed through the wall with Adon following him through the hole.

JOHNNY GOMEZ: “That’s gonna leave a mark.”

All three laugh.

Inside the room, instead more stone walls and other decorations, it looked like the backstage area of a set, complete with people in jeans and tee shirts walking around with coffee, clipboards, and headphones. Scattered around the room was television cameras, cables, lights and other pieces of TV equipment. Everyone in the room stared at the combatants in shock.

NICK DIAMOND: “Adon seems to have the upper hand here.”
JOHNNY GOMEZ: “But the guard has grabbed, the producer of LICC! He’s actually beating Adon over the head with the producer!”
JASON: “That’s just not right.”

Adon caught the producer and ripped him out of the guard’s grasp. Tossing the producer aside, he charged around and sent the guard flying back through the hole and into the courtyard.

JOHNNY GOMEZ: “They’re back in the courtyard.”
JASON: “Yes, but what is the guard doing now?
NICK DIAMOND: “He grabbed one of the redshirts and punched the poor guy. I thought this fight was supposed to be between the guard and Adon.
JOHNNY GOMEZ: “It is. He’s copying himself onto that redshirt by using the dreaded Clone-A-Smith maneuver!”
JASON: “This doesn’t look good for Adon. Instead of a one-on-one fight, we now have a two-on-one fight on our hands.”

Guard: “Me, me, me.”
Guard: “Me too.”
Adon: “You sure do like your movies, don’t you?”
Guards: “Yes, we do.”

Both guards attacked Adon at once in a flurry of kicks and punches. Adon dodged and fought back knocking one guard into the other. The first copy grabbed the second and started punching him in the head.

Guard: “STOP… HITTING… YOURSELF!!!”

The last blow knocked the guard’s head clean off. The rest of the guard’s body reverted back to the redshirt.

Adon: “Back to just you against just me.

NICK DIAMOND: “Jason’s fingers must be getting tired from all this typing, so this fight will probably be wrapping up soon.”
JASON: “What?”

Adon grabbed the guard by the neck.

Adon: “Here’s a trick that I learned from Douglas Adams...”

NICK DIAMOND: “Adon’s got the guard by the throat. I think he has something up his sleeve.”

Adon stretched out the guard’s neck and tied it into a knot.

JOHNNY GOMEZ: “It’s the Hitchhiker’s Necktie!”
NICK DIAMOND: “Unbelievable, Johnny. We haven’t seen that move around here in years.”

He dropped the body with the large knot in the neck. Mills Lane came up and lifted Adon’s arm.

MILLS LANE: “And Commander Adon is the winner!”

Adon pulled his arm back.

Adon: “Get away from me, shorty.”

JASON: “This fight is over.”
NICK DIAMOND: “Well, that looks like it’s about it for us.”
JOHNNY GOMEZ: “I’m Johnny Gomez, for Nick Diamond and Jason, good fight, good night!”

Rikard, Enesku, Alex, and Keiran emerge on the surface of the planet, Keiran holding the piece of the sceptre.

"So the whole planet is alive and aware. Wow, that's amazing. I've heard of this type of thing occurring but I'd never actually seen it until now. I guess that explains all the quakes. And Quinn's warning about 'the natural.'"

Rikard looks around the beach, once again sunny and bright.

"I wonder how long it'll take Dnar'af to show up."

No sooner has Rikard spoken than the team dissapears with a ZAP! They find themselves in the canyon alongside Dnar'af... and a small spacecraft.

"My congradulations. You have the piece?"

Kieran holds up the shard and prepares to hand it over.

"You'll want to keep that for just a moment. No doubt you can find room for it somewhere. In the meantime, the other group has found one bit of the Sceptre and are now looking for a third. Three of you are now going to find the remaining piece."

"Three?"

"That's right. I have something else in mind for you," Dnar'af indicates Keiran. "For now, though, would everyone climb aboard?" Dnar'af opens the hatch to the ship, and ushers the heroes inside. They see that the interior is laid out much like an intrasystem craft, not designed for interstellar flight. Nevertheless, Dnar'af works the controls and pilots the craft up. He then ZAP!s the ship across space, and then addresses the heroes.

"In the rear compartment, the three of you will find spacesuits you can put on if you so choose. I'd highly reccomend doing so. We're going to be meeting up with a ship that's not in very good shape.

"What ship is that?" Rikard asks.

"Behold the freighter Ytiuqar." Dnar'af gestures to the viewscreen, which shows a massive ship looming in the distance. "Built to transport a number of valued relics for a civilization that found itself in need of a new homeworld, the Ytiquar never managed to find its destination. Instead, it lies crippled here, the victim of some unfortunate malady. The last piece of the Sceptre, the headpiece, is aboard. Find it, and I'll upgrade the ship's replication system. Questions?"

"Um, no. Grant. Grant Lopez. My friend over there is Butrfli. What's your name?" My God, Lopez thought. Did I just talk to her like she's a four year old?

Suianen frowms some more.

"Qxatl? Menaka jaron nekhil pret?"

A very formidable-looking feathered fellow appears.

DID SOMEONE CALL?

"NO! And why do you keep following me?"

WHOA.

The Aztec god is somewhat taken aback.

I DIDN'T REALLY EXPECT SOMEONE TO TAKE NOTICE OF ME, A ONE-POSTER, A PHANTOM RETURNS RELIC, A GENUINE KAM-ITE SILLY POST. WELL, SINCE NOW I'LL GET IN THE SCREEN ACTOR'S GUILD, I WON'T SMITE YOU FOR THAT.

The god disappears.

How sharper than a serpent's tooth it is to bear a thankless child.

Happiness is always available if one only grasps for it.

Butrfli begins to stir, having put several sleep and regenerative spells on herself as she collapsed in tiredness. Refreshed, she sits up and watches the exchange between Grant and Suianen with interest, just having missed the ancient Middle american deity.
Need a hand, Grant? I could offer a universal translator spell...

Sure, we've found quite a bit, Jackson, just nothing we need. The ruins aren't really as large as we had guessed, and we've nearly gone through all of it.

Milkshake crosses over to the window and stares out at the hot, dusty afternoon.

Wait, where's Artsy? I haven't seen her since we left for work this morning.

"Yeah," Rikard says as he puts on the EV suit.
"Where are you taking him?" indicating Keiran.

"Yes, that would be nice."

"Mr. Morgan will be assisting some of your fellows with the restoration of the Sceptre."

Dnar'af guides the ship up to a docking port, and begins the docking procedure.

"Anything else?"

No! Nooo! NOOOOOOOO!!!

Dnar'af pauses for a moment, as if he heard something, and then continues.

"Very well, then. The airlock is right that way. I'll be back to collect you all once you've located the Sceptre piece."

The heroes depart through the airlock, and Dnar'af disengages the dock.

"So," Keiran comments. "here we are."

"Indeed." Dnar'af manipulates the ship across space once again, and soon Allyon can be seen on the viewscreen.

"Your captain and his group are on that planet. They're in a bit of an undercover situation at the moment, but... this should be all right." He flips some switches and opens a channel to Milkshake's communicator.

"Commander Milkshake, this is Dnar'af. Please respond." He then sits back and awaits Milkshake's reply.

"I'll have your commander, or someone else on the team, bring the piece of the Sceptre they've collected to you. Then you'll take the two pieces to where Mrs. Butrfli and Mr. Lopez are working and, hopefully, you'll be able to help them."

With a wave of her hand and a small chant, Butrfli creates a spell that allows them to understand Suianen.
Do you know how long you've been here, and what do you know about Dnar'af?

Milkshake here.

"Commander, I need you or one of your men to bring the Sceptre piece to the crash site. I'll be sending in Mr. Morgan to collect it."

In the magic lab, Suianen seizes on Butrfli's last word.

"Dnar'af! Is he with you? Have you brought the Scpetre?"

No, he isn't here with us.. He's having our friends find pieces of the sceptre. Actually, he's been sending us on quests all over the galaxy. By the way, you've been in magical suspended animation for about the last few thousand years...

"Thousands of years? All over the galaxy? Yes... that explains why you don't look Zorotaxian! Excuse me... I just need to get my bearings. You must tell me everything you know about what's happened!"

Good timing, Dnar'af, we happen to be free from duties at the moment. I'll be along myself. Send Keiran here in about an hour.

"Very well. He'll meet you then." Dnar'af closes the connection and sets about landing the ship.

"I'll get as close to the crash site as possible, but you may have a bit of a walk."

An hour later...

Keiran is peering at a short-range sensor display on Dnar'af's ship. A single lifesign is approaching at a fairly quick velocity.

"The Marines are here." Keiran says, then opens the airlock.

Several minutes later...

Milkshake crests the nearest hill, kicking up clouds of Allyon dust in his wake.

"Milkshake." Keiran greets, waving.

"Morgan." Milkshake says as soon as he draws near, reaching into his pocket.

"Eight miles in forty-five minutes, not bad. And over hilly terrain." Keiran says with a grin.

Milkshake pulls out the Sceptre piece, gasping a bit for breath. "That's nothing. You haven't seen what they set for cadets to do at the Extreme Operations Academy." He hands it over.

"Actually, I have." Keiran replies.

Milkshake gives his Temporal Advisor an odd look. "That's another one of those stories you promised to tell us someday, I'll bet."

Keiran gives an enigmatic shrug. "How's the rest?"

"Fine, we haven't found anything yet. Actually, we were wondering where Artsy had disappeared to when you arrived."

"Artsy's gone? She--" Keiran breaks off, and places a hand on his forehead.

"What is it?"

"A telepath. We've just been probed, big time. Except it's not nearby...maybe in the town. I should come back with you..." Given what he's just felt, Morgan is fairly concerned.

Dnar'af's voice is projected from the starship. "No, Mr. Morgan. I have a job for you, now. They can take care of themselves."

Morgan mutters. "I'm easily irritated by that man. Keep on the lookout, Steve, and try to find Artsy. She may be in trouble. I've found a lot about our friend Dnar'af, I'll tell you all about it later. Later."

Morgan shakes his captain's hand, then turns about and heads back to the starship.

With a hiss, the hatch connecting the airlock to the rest of the ship opens. Rikard, Eneksu, and Alex Dupree are met with pitch darkness. They turn the lights on their suits on as well as flashlights that Dnar'af provided. There are several objects floating in the corridor that they have entered.

"Well, no gravity or power," Rikard says, in full Mr. Obvious mode, "We'll stay together until we can get power back and make sure we're the only living things on this ship. If or when that happens, we can split up to look for the sceptre. Comms on at all times. Understood?"

Before Artsy can say anything more, the boy suddenly looks sharply off to the side, toward the darkness. His eyes go unfocussed, and then most disturbingly, his pupils dilate almost completely open.

"Someone else is here. Two people. They could be threats, very powerful. He..."

The boy looks penetratingly at Artsy. "That one is the one closest to you. Another is one you know. They are leaving now. They are still dangerous. I could imbalance their engines, destroy their ship. How would you feel about that?"

Alex: Right. Should we go to Engineering to see if we can power back?

Butrfli: Do you want to know what's been going in the universe in general, or just what my group has been doing with Dnar'af in particular?

Grant taps Butrfli on the shoulder. "Um, I don't mean to sound rude, but I'm pretty sure she meant Dnar'af."

Good point Grant, but I also figured that she might want to know what's been going on in the universe at large, too...
Anyway... Here's the basic story...
Butrfli goes on to briefly tell Suianen about how the LICC came to meet Dnar'af, the various quests he's been sending them on, and their current quest.
...and, it would seem, that your story has become the stuff of legend... take a look at this book over here.
Butrfli indicates the book that the legend and notes are in.

Suianen, absorbed in the story, takes the book and reads from it for a while.

"Fascinating... So much of this is true, or close to it. Making Dnar'af out to be some dangrous magic-hoarder! Well, it would appear that history truly is written by the victors..." She suddenly comes to.

"So! What we need now is the Sceptre?"
And speaking of the Sceptre, Keiran, carrying the pieces that have been collected so far, re-enters Dnar'af's craft.

"Excellent," Dnar'af observes. "Now, on to our next stop."

Shortly thereafter, the ship comes to rest in the canyon containing the lab's enterance.

"Down the canyon a ways is the enterance to the lab where Mrs. Butrfli and Mr. Lopez are working. I trust you'll be able to find them."

Rikard nods.
"Yeah, let's try to find this thing's engineering section. That would be the best place to restore any power we could muster up. Be on the lookout for any relics while we're searching. This place is stocked full of them."

"No worries. I'll see what I can do with these things."

Keiran holds up the Sceptre pieces.

"You will call me when Milkshake has found the other piece, won't you? Do me a favor, Dnar'af. Keep an eye on them. There's more danger than they think there. You know and I know we've gotten enough trouble at your request."

With that, Keiran is out the airlock and departs the starship.

Well, Dnar'af wanted us to retrive its pieces... what was he able to do with the Sceptre in one piece?
Odd.. I feel a wave of fresh magic around here... It kind of feels like Kieran...

"The Sceptre was his load stone- with it, he could perform magical acts on a scale no one could dream of. G'anteen was afraid that Dnar'af would use the Sceptre to grant magical powers to all the Zorotaxian people- that's why he moved against him."

Adon pushed open a huge pair of doors that lead to an inner courtyards. There were walls all around them, and a smaller set of doors on the far side. As soon as the group entered the courtyard, the great doors swung shut on their own. Then that dumb theme music started playing and laughter came from a platform situated above the smaller set of doors on the far side.

Two of the group members were waiting for them on the platform, the red one, and the green one.

BWA-HAHAHAHA!!! Congratulations on making it this far, evil doers. But now I must destroy you all!

You'll never get past us.

The group paused, and Adon looked at the pair with a mix of amusement and discust.

That's right! We've got a huge pile of rocks with your names on them, and we're going to squish you like a bug!!! You can start begging for mercy now, but I doubt its going to work.

Umm, since this is a trap, shouldn't you NOT tell them what to expect?

You're such an amature, you know. What you want to do in this situation is make them think they know what's coming.

THERE IS NO ESCAPE AND THERE IS NO MERCY! YOU'RE ABOUT TO BE SMASHED FLAT LIKE A BU....

Adon had jumped up to the level of the platform and kneed the red one in the head. He flew backwards and bounced off the wall, before droping like a rock to the ground. A spin and the green one was also knocked down. Adon followed them down, but his landing was much more gentle.

Sorry to interrupt you. I'm going to get smashed like a what, now?

The red one just groaned.

A short time later, they were tied up and being dragged along the group down the short corridor. They came to a dead end with a rope hanging in front of them.

Ok, where do we go from here?

Just pull the rope in front of you, and you can go on.

They looked up at the rope. It was attached to a small pin, that was holding a rather large and heavy looking object in the air.

Why don't you pull the rope.

What? Surely a great warrior like yourself isn't afriad of a little rope, are you?

I'm not kidding! Do it!

Listen here, cowboy, it seems to me that you're the one who wants to go on, so why don't you just waltz over there and pull....

NOW!

The red one was lifted onto his feet and placed in front of the rope by invisible forces. And then the rope was pulled on its own. Sure enough, the large pan filled with rocks dropped and landed on his head with a bang.

Now do you want to tell us how to continue on?

There's a... dial on the... right. Just... twist it... and the... door will... open.

This time, he was telling the truth, and a door opened revealing a shadow filled room beyond. The two colored freaks were left hanging, head down and still tied up, from the ceiling where the pan of rocks was.

"I'll go look. Better safe than sorry. Stay here with her. Oh, wait. The traps! We need to dismantle them or Kieran and whoever else is with him will be in serious trouble."

"Almost..."

The chamber door grinds open, and Keiran steps inside, cautiously looking about for trouble. Finding none, he greets the trio inside and closes the door again. As he turns around, the three gasp. Keiran's jacket back is studded with the poison 'smart' darts. He looks back and momentarily reacts with surprise at their stunned looks.

"Oh! Oh...no, don't worry. I'm fine, my reflexes are a little slow, that's all. I'm afraid the jacket's a write-off, though." Morgan approaches. "So, what have you found?"

I'm impressed. It took a couple of spells to get Grant and me through... anyway...
Kieran Morgan, meet Suianen. Suianen, meet Kieran Morgan. I think I may have mentioned him in my brief description of our adventures.
Kieran, this place is amazing... the scientists who worked here were researching magic... and found some interesting spells, as you've found out...

A frenzied flurry of color sweeps through Artsy as surprise overtakes her.

The boy watches...not gleefully, as she thinks at first...but patiently expectant. As if he genuinely wondered how she would feel.

"Why...why would you do such a horrible thing?" Artsy asks, her eyes settling into a deep cobalt blue, while her still-short hair almost glows a sickly green-silver-turquoise, with orange blossoming at the hairline.

The boy stares at her, his eyes still dilated black, giving him an alien appearance. "Horrible?" he asks as if he doesn't understand. Then his eyes slowly seem to return to normal, and his gaze is drawn to something only he can see. "I've done it before. I was very young, and I think it was a ship sent for us. I knew it was coming, but it was still far off. I didn't understand, and I was scared, and I didn't think. I hit it, and then I couldn't feel it anymore. And then right after mama and daddy...went away. Another one, bigger, I could feel the people on it. I had been so angry...I was going to hit the people who kept food from my parents...but I hit the ship instead. I could feel it come all to pieces. That would show those people outside." The boy pauses to think, then continues, thoughts seemingly spilling out without order, one after the other. "Nobody would understand. If those people knew about me, they would hurt me. Only my parents knew about me, and they didn't tell those people, because they knew they would hurt me. I know everything everyone knows...but I don't understand anything."

Artsy remains deathly-still, unable to speak. She starts to, but the boy speaks first.

"I know you wouldn't hurt me, Artsy. Not you or the Commander or Adon or Enesku or Keiran-eli or anyone." The boy unthinkingly uses Artsy's own name for Morgan. "Those people outside deserve to stay here. They will while I am here."

"I'm getting sick of dark places."
Rikard, Enesku, and Alex, in that order, make their way through the Ytiuqar. Fortunately, Dnar'af had given Alex a scanner and he'd been able to determine what he believed was the ship's engineering section.

"They don't bother me," Enesku says. Rikard doesn't respond, but continues looking for places where the relics could be stored. They'd already been to two storage rooms and found no sceptre piece. As they pass a corridor, Rikard notices movement in the corner of his vision. When he looks, nothing is there.
"Hold up. Alex, scan the area for life signs. Are you picking anything up?"

Alex shakes his head. "Nothing. Are you sure you saw something?"

"Hmm," Rikard says, staring down the corridor and listening. He hears only silence. "Maybe I just imagined it. Let's get to Engineering get some power back to this ship. It's giving me the creeps."

Rikard, Alex, and Enesku slowly but surely make their way aft. The ship is very very silent, almost to the point where one's own heartbeat can be heard.

The trio struggle through a corridor half-blocked with debris, structural beams, dead power conduits. Finally they make it through, only to be stopped by a barrier filling most of the hallway. Rikard tries to push against it. It is slightly soft, and slightly warm. He shoves hard...and a growl emanates from somewhere.

And then the barrier shifts of its own accord, and Rikard finds himself staring into a hideous, reptilian face with a gaping, angular jaw.

"Hello there." Darth Terror says.

Isn't he the one that posessed Adon and killed Jackson, thus bringing me here when Milkshake tried to bring Jackson back to life but inadvertently summoned me?

*bust out laughing*

Viewer 2: Now that's one unflappable fallow.

A look of shock and horror passes over Rikard's face. Tacoman's question goes unanswered as he immediately brings his rifle up and points it at Terror's face.
"No, no. This can't be happening. You're dead!! I saw Adon kill you!!!! It's impossible! You can't be alive. Dnar'af, this isn't funny! STOP IT RIGHT NOW!!!!"
During his screams, Rikard does not take his eyes off of Terror.

I thought that might have been him.
Alex performs the same action that Rikard does, but with the scanner instead.
Hmm... He's not registering on here... he could be holographic, or something that one the relics has thrown at us, or something...

In a flash, Terror's clawed hands reach out and pull the scanner and phaser rifle from Rikard and Alex's grasp.

"Hmm. Hmm hmm hmm." Terror examines both, then, opening his jaws impossibly wide, swallows both weapon and instrument. "Delicious!" His glittering red eyes slide back towards the trio.

"How can you be here? I saw your head come off. The DoS destroyed your body. What, were you resurrected when Adon came back? How can you be alive?!"

Terror's supremely ugly face crumples in what looks like a ghastly version of a disappointed frown.

"What an awful thing to say. All right. I know when I'm not wanted."

With that, Terror extends to his full height, and drives one fist straight through the metal overhead decking. He pulls the decking apart, raising a terrific din, then lifts himself through and disappears somewhere on the deck above.

Now you've gone and hurt his feelings! You're always getting mad at me when I do that and now you start doing it yourselves. From now on I'm not going to listen to a word I say. I'm going off to find the holodeck.

(she wanders off away from Alex and Rikard, in the direction they all came from)

The door to the dilapitated barracks creaks open, and Milkshake enters.

"I'm back, folks, and--"

Artsy has returned, and from her color, she isn't happy. In one hand, she holds a small object. A piece of the Sceptre. Milkshake sinks back into an old folding chair.

"Artsy, where have you been?"

In the next few, steadily more stressful minutes, Artsy recounts what she had found, repeating nearly word for word the conversation she had with the boy.

"...and then he wouldn't say anything more. He pressed this into my hand," she says, holding up the Sceptre piece, "and asked me to leave. Commander, this is a boy who needs serious help. His mind...something's very very wrong. His world and how he sees others is skewed. And he has the powers to do terrible things to the colony."

Milkshake is silent for a few moments.

"Morgan was here, when Dnar'af stopped by to pick up our Sceptre piece. He warned me that we were in danger from a telepath. Can I see that?"

He holds out his hand for the Sceptre shard, which he recieves. He turns it over and over in one gauntleted hand, then, coming to a decision, closes his fist over it.

"Artsy, we can't. I think this is far too dangerous to deal with. If this boy decided to hurt us, there's nothing we can do to stop him. It's best we leave as soon as possible."

A blossom of fiery orange causes Artsy's eyes to seem to blaze, as first shock then anger takes hold.

"Commander, these people are in the same danger. I think we can help this boy, we must try! He has so much anger in him..."

"Enough!" Milkshake barks.

And in her mind, Artsy hears a faint voice.

"...i won't hurt you...but i will make you leave me alone."

With a shock, Artsy realizes why the Commander is so adamant. But finally, she accepts the situation.

"Yes, Commander." she says listlessly.

"Fine." Milkshake looks to the rest of the team. "Pack up, guys. I want us off this planet within the hour."

Does this place even have a holodeck?
In light of current conditions, I think we should also look for the armory...
Hey look... relics from Betazed... The Sacred Cups of Troi...

"I don't care," Rikard growls as he looks up at the hole torn by Terror and then at Enesku as she walks away. He follows, quickly catching up. When he reaches her, he roughly grabs her by the arm and spins her around to face him.

"Let go of me," she demands forcefully. He tightens his grip. Even through the EV suit, she can feel his vice-like hold.

"Listen, I don't really give a piece of dren how you feel about how I talk to our enemies. In case you didn't notice, Darth Terror is on this ship. Last time we saw him, Adon cut his head off. Don't you think it's a little strange that one of the most powerful and deadly enemies we've faced and killed is on this ship, alive?"
Enesku now has an expression of a little distress and pain on her face. Rikard realizes what he's doing. He loosens his grip and lets go.
"Oh, geez. Enesku, I'm, I'm sorry."

But this isn't Terror. Terror's dead. This is someone who ate our equipment because of how *you* reacted. Well, no-one's getting his teeth on my spear, whether he looks like Taconator, High Warlord O'kak, or that guy whose name I can't remember.

You guys really need to keep your cool sometimes. she says, rolling her eyes with the air of someone who has never gotten angry in her life, and believes herself above those who ever lose their temper.

Ok you two, cut it out.
Before he ate my scanner, it was showing activity of some sort among the relics.. like one of them was radiating energy... besides, as I said earlier, the scanner wasn't reading any extra life signs. Let's just find the engine room, get things running, locate the piece, and get out of here.

The colony group has reached the small valley where their false spaceship wreck rests. Milkshake looks around a bit, then shouts up to the sky.

Dnar'af, come on! We're ready!

As Enesku walks away, Rikard turns toward Alex.

"If he was just energy, how did he eat our stuff?"

Watch this!

(Using his power ring he creates a huge orange flare beacon, which raises up to the sky)

If that doesn't alert him to our presence he must be blind!

He won't be the only one alerted, Pete.

Milkshake points to the southeast, to the colony town.

There goes our quiet departure.

If they ask, we can tell them it's the northern lights.

ZAP!

The somewhat impatient crewmembers find themselves whisked back to the canyon, where Dnar'af waits besides the space craft he had used to get the others to the frieghter.

"You have the piece? Very good, Commander, only one left.

"I think what would be best for right now is for one of you to bring the piece that you have to Mr. Morgan- he's nearby- while I take the rest of you to join your compatriots in searching for the final piece. Any druthers on who goes where?"

The Evil Executive is reading the latest ratings report, and blows his stack...

AGNES! Get those writers in here yesterday!!!!!!!

Five seconds later, the LICC writers are in the EE's office.

Look at these ratings!!! Look at them!!!! A bunch of monkeys could do better! Except for the guy who wrote the Adon storyline. Move it along people, or you'll never work in this town again!

It was a dark and stormy night in Sickbay because somebody - or better someone - had played with carefully adjusted the environmental controls. The still not quite restored doctor was tied up in his office whose door was blocked by a heap of Tribbles. On a biobed several holographic candles were flickering around a hand-drawn pentagram. Strange noises could be heard from a distant corner of the room...

"So, what stocks do you recommend now?"

"Well, the current political situation on Earth is still a bit shaky but under the influence of Angoria and Ca$h-M'eer the trend could go to cybernetic sheep. They not only produce synthetic fabrics but can be used as phaser-fodder too. There might be even other applications but they are certainly beyond my knowledge and experience."

"Yes, there are truly perverted robots out there. I already thought of creating a special liquor for them that is extremely cheap to produce (from warp drive waste?) and very addictive."

"And it should contain hidden nanobots just in case you want to conquer the planet or something more. I know a good manufacturer who supplied the Borg some time ago."

"Of course that's my plan. Great minds think alike."

"Thank you..."

=/\=
Bridge to Furby, bridge to Furby, could you please come upstairs here?
=/\=

=/\=
"Is this really necessary? Right now I'm amidst very important consultations with a succubus, if you understand what I mean..."
=/\=

=/\=
Err, uh-oh, well, it would be really nice if you could...oh, nevermind, Sir!
=/\=

"Hewmans... Where did he interrupt us, darling?"


~


Or should I've added an erotic scene? PG13? Boss? Boss?! Boss! Somebody should reanimate him now or we all will lose or jobs! Hey, it's not my fault!

Runs for his life.

Not sure, sir... I didn't say he was energy, but said that one of the relics was radiating energy... which around here, could mean anything...
Look.. things from Earth's North Pole... large sack...red and white suit with the label S. Claus... Look, I found another scanner in this bag!

FAST FORWARD!

ZZZIIIPPP!!!

I'll bring over the last piece.

"Excellent. You'll find the enterance on the canyon wall further down. You might call before you go in, though; you don't want to get caught up in any booby traps.

"The rest of you, if you would, please board this spacecraft and I'll see you to your destination."

Dnar'af proceeds to lift off from the planet and explains the situation of the freighter as the crew gets their suits on. Very soon, he is docking the ship with the Ytiuqar.

"Happy hunting!" he says as the airlock opens.

As if a bad omen, the Ytiuqar rocks and shakes slightly.

On the relic ship, Enesku and Rikard look like they're in the middle of fighting...something, with Enesku holding her weapon in a striking position, and Rikard looking like he's about to be hit by something. Alex, on the other hand, is breathing somewhat heavily while looking at the shattered remains of a nearby relic.
See? I was right... that relic projected our fears to us... once it was destroyed, our fears went away. It explains Darth Terror and O'kak, but doesn't really explain the dancing glazed donuts with the really big swords...

Well, I don't tell you about all my nightmares, do I? Especially the ones I get when I eat those hallucinogenic donuts.

I've said too much.

Richard Simmons pops up

I'd say you eat too much, sister.

"I'm sure these spells are fascinating, but first things first, we've got to disable those traps before anyone else gets caught. Grant, will you help me with that?"

Grumble grumble...so I'm the only neon light technician available on New Year's Eve, and so I'm the only one to drive all the way out to fix Old Lang's Sign....

fixes it

2004!

Why does J.A. Lang have a sign? I thought he just supervised scpipts!

After a long, hard day at work, a good Scpipt Supervisor deserves his own sign to watch.

"Hallucinogenic donuts. Right, how about you go look for this ships non-existant holodeck again? Alex and I can get the ship's power back. Or any that's left."

Soon after, the ship's gravity is restored as well as a few systems.

And a ways after that, the traps in the scientific facility have been disabled, Milkshake has arrived, and Morgan is nearly complete assembling the Sceptre.

"This really is a devious little thing," says Morgan, inspecting the nearly-reconstructed artifact, "a channeler for all sorts of energies. It seems almost to have grown like this rather than been built. Suianen, where did this come from?"

In a corridor, Jackson and Alex meet.
Jackson: Found anything yet?
Alex: Nothing yet. How've your missions been?
Jackson: They went pretty well...one of the pieces was guarded by cat-bee things... used a bit of magic to get out of that...
Alex: You should have seen the planet my group was sent to... it was literally alive and sentient...
Jackson: Hmm... never seen that before...
Anyway, on with the search...

I wonder...

checks his chronometer

We've been at this for...eight days now. I mean all this work for Dnar'af. I don't know about the rest of you, but it sure seems longer.

Rikard remains in Engineering as Alex goes to greet the recently arrived group. Despite getting gravity and some power back, there are still no lights, or at least very few. He uses the ships sensors to scan its many many decks, and locates several storage areas that seem to contain relics, possibly including the last sceptre piece. As he continues to study the readouts, something catches the corner of his eye, in the shadows. He thinks he sees movement. Grabbing his rifle, which reappeared along with Alex's scanner after Alex had destroyed the relic, he spins around. Nothing is there. He looks around the room and listens, but finds nothing.

"This place is really getting to me. Rikard to Tacoman. Alex, do you copy?"
Alex responds, "Yeah, I copy. Go ahead."
"When you scanned this ship, are you sure you didn't pick up any life readings?"
"No sir, I scanned it three times. I didn't pick up anything alive or otherwise. Why, have you found something?"
"No, forget about it. I'll meet you guys in a few minutes with some more info on where we can look. Rikard out."
Rikard still isn't sure if he'd seen anything or not, but he holds onto his rifle nevertheless.
"Rikard to Enesku, how are you doing? And for that matter, what are you doing? You still alright?"

Suianen shakes her head.

"I'm not entirely sure... I wasn't with Dnar'af when he constructed it. He always claimed to have made it himself, though.

On the Ytiuqar, Rikard checks his scanner again. It suddenly chirps, indicating that it has found the Sceptre piece... then it beeps again... and again... As Rikard watches, the scanner somehow manages to locate the piece in five separate rooms scattered all over the ship...

"It's brilliant work, whatever it is. In fact..."

Morgan cradles the incomplete Sceptre in one hand, and slowly extends it, safely aiming at a huge, featureless stone wall. A coruscating blast of magickal energy bursts from the wand, and dashes itself against the wall with a deafening explosion.

The wall is undamaged. Morgan peers at the device. "It still channels energy, at least."

It's amazing how much potential power and magic I can feel coming from it. In the wrong hands, this thing could be devestating.

And I don't think that we should just give this stick to Dnar'af. I had a rather disturbing conversation with him while you all were in the maze.

You don't say Commander?

Walking along the wall eating some pizza, Jadlad moves in closer to get a better look at the artifact.

Sir, this thing is major wierdness! And I should know.

So what did you two talk about?

Continuity!

Oh, well you know Sharie, she wouldn't stop talking about her new hair and boyfriend and birthday coming up and blah blah blah...am I boring you, Jadlad?

What about?

Briefly, Milkshake details the philosophical discussion he had with Dnar'af, that culminated in the ethics of suicide...

Then Jadlad fades away and reappears on the Ytiuqar.

Wow, that was...different. I could have sworn I left the Ytiuqar and was with Commander Milkshake just now.

(to Jadlad)

Hmmm... it reminds me of that episode of Port Mike where Victor Nightshade disappeared and could have sworn he was somewhere else. Funny, but you kind of remind me of ol' Vic sometimes.

(long pause)

They really shouldn't have cancelled that show.

After Milkshake's explanation...

"That puts a new dimension on things." Keiran says.

That it does...
I wonder if there would be a way to delay his plans, if he had any.

(After a log and fruitless search involving climbing ladders and falling through junk Enesku has found her way to what she thinks is a holodeck)

Aha! Computer, recreate the beach on Kyana Prime!

(Nothing happens)

Oh I get it, this is one of those old-time holodecks!

(She looks for the control panel, and finds what she assumes must be it. Unfortunately, she can't figure out how to open it)

What's the matter with this?

(She punches at it, but to no avail. Getting an idea, she slips out of the room and picks out a smallish object from a pile of debris she had fallen into on her way. Enesku takes the object into the "holodeck" and gives the control panel a thump. The panel falls off and the controls are accessible)

Now, let's get down to business!

(Unfortunately, although the controls are accessible, Enesku has no idea what to do with it. They look suspiciously like buttons on a spray-painted pocket calculator.

The first one she hits has no effect. She tries another. A hatch opens in the wall, and a bucket comes out and clatters to the floor.

She tries another one. One of the other walls slides away, but stops before getting very far. More debris falls from above.

Another one. A hatch opens in the floor directly below Enesku, and she falls through it and down something akin to a helter skelter.

Just as that happens, she gets the call from Rikard.)

"Rikard to Enesku, how are you doing? And for that matter, what are you doing? You still alright?"

Well... you'll never believe this, but I...

(But Rikard is somewhat distracted by a clattering noise coming from the wall right next to him. Turning round to get closer to the sound, he sees it comes from through a panel in the wall. The panel slides open and Enesku falls out, along with the object she used to smash open the control panel... the object which is in fact the final piece of the Sceptre.)

Rikard! I was just talking to you!

*collective gasp*

Enesku rulez!

Keiran holds the unfinished Sceptre up to the light.

"There just may be." he reples to Butrfli.

Suddenly, those in the lab realize that Suianen has dissapeared...

General commotion in the lab, the usual "What the"s and "Where did"s and "Wha happen"s, you know how it goes.

Ceffiree follows Adon through the newly-opened door, chuckling at the plight of Red and Green.

"What now, boss?"

Suianen is trying to find her way out to the canyon, but she takes an unfortunate turn right off the bat and only gets herself mired further in the lab's corridors...

Rikard looks more than a little suprised.
"Enesku. You- you found the last piece. Good job," he says, smiling and happy that they're finally done. "Come on, let's meet the rest of the group and get off of this ship." Rikard and Enesku leave the engineering section. Rikard contacts the rest of the LICC and they agree to meet near the docking area. As they turn a corner, Rikard spins around, looking back down the corridor from which they came.
"What is it?" Enesku asks.
"I saw-" he stops when the light of his rifle falls upon an alien creature, clinging to the ceiling, "something." The creature is completely black, with no visible eyes. It's holding onto the deck with four legs ending in sharp, black claws. It opens its mouth, hissing, and Enesku and Rikard can see that it's full of long, sharp teeth.
"What is that thing?" Enesku whispers.
"Um, an alien creature," Rikard answers. Enesku shoots him a slightly annoyed look. "It doesn't look too friendly," Rikard says, "let's just meet with with the rest-." Before Rikard can finish the creature lunges at them with a scream. Rikard quickly brings up his rifle and fires. The creature hits Rikard, dead.

"Yeah, let's go. There could be more of these things." As if in response to his statement, they both hear a rustling sound behind them. Enesku and Rikard slowly turn around to see the walls, floor, and ceiling completely black, covered by hundreds of the creatures.
"Holy..." his voice trails off.
"Um, let's go," Enesku mutters. Rikard just nods in response. Both turn and run, back toward engineering and away from the hundreds of creatures.

Morgan is out of the lab in an instant, one or possibly more of his compatriots on his heels, looking for the departed defrosted woman...

Kieran, catch!
Butrfli deftly tosses a tricorder towards Kieran, who catches it as deftly. Looking at it, Kieran smiles, as Butrfli has programed it to find Suianen.
Once we know where she is, we can use a transport spell to bring her here!

Meanwhile, on the ship, Alex and Jackson are searching through relics. Hearing a sound, they both turn, finding themselves face to face with the creatures that Rikard and Enesku found. The two heroes look at each other, and run. As they run, they fire behind them, hoping to stop the creatures.

Morgan gestures around the lab.

"I really wouldn't try a transport spell here, Butrfli. A heck of a lot of spells have been cast here, the air is so thick with magic you can smell it. A transport spell might easily go awry. This tricorder will help, though, thanks."

With that, Morgan exits.

(The creatures follow Rikard and Enesku on their run back to engineering. Enesku is about to throw the piece of sceptre at one of the creatures, but Rikard holds her back)

Call Dnar'af! Call Dnar'af! Cal-

"You're getting too much into this."

"NO! No, no, no, no, no, no, no. Try this."
Rikard pulls Enesku behind him with his left arm and brings up the rifle with the other, firing at the coming swarm. Most of his hits are true and several creatures fall. The rest don't slow, though.
"Come on," Enesku says as they reach the engineering section. She pulls him through and they shut the door.

"Hopefully, that holds them for a while. Rikard to team, we've got a problem. Enesku and I have run across some type of alien creatures. Hundreds of them. And they don't seem very happy with our presence here. We have the last sceptre piece, so we need Dnar'af back quickly. Enesku and I are safe in Engineering for the moment, though we might be trapped. We'll try to find a way out of here. I wouldn't recommend engaging these things unless you've got something that could quickly wipe out swarms of them. Rikard out." He takes a quick look around the engineering section again.

"I hope Dnar'af gets back soon or this could be the end for us. And I hope that those doors are the only way into this thing. And that it takes a while for them to get through. Now, let's get out of here. Maybe that info I was looking at earlier can give us something."
He walks over to the nearby console.

"Excuse me for interupting sirs, but would it be possible for me to get back to my Fighter Bay anytime soon?"

Pilot, I'd imagine our chances of ever getting back to the ship rest solely on that missing woman. If you're in any sort of hurry, you might be inclined to help look.

"Of course. I just think it would be easier if I had acces to my fighter's Andafi designed sensor array. It is partially based on telepathy, if Jason Kiehart explained it to me right."

Well, unless you've got your fighter parked somewhere nearby, we're going to have to make do without it.

Suianen has roamed much deeper into the complex. Her magical sense tells her there are more traps ahead of her. She starts trying to see if she can alter them to seek out anyone not of her species...

"Ah ha!"

Morgan has spotted the wayward Suianen deep at the end of a long corridor. She seems to be concentrating on a huge metallic panel set in the wall, and quickly departs when he draws closer.

That's when the trap is triggers. The panel rotates, revealing hundreds and perhaps thousands of tiny little barrels aiming outward. Looking rather like...

"Gun barrels?"

The natives' perverse love for projectile traps is demonstrated once again as the air is filled with steelite missiles fired by the panel trap.

Suianen flees as Keiran draws closer. By this time, she has deduced that she has blundered far from the exit, so she tries to buy herself some more time. To do this, she casts a spell that creates a false wall behind her, making it appear that the corridor comes to a dead end. That done, she keeps exploring...

And on she goes, occasionally hearing the tell-tale sound of a trap being tripped far behind her. But then the sounds stop, and the signs begin to display directions to the exit again. And then...

She turns a corner to find a very tattered Morgan sitting calmly in an armchair, waiting for her.

"Is it something we said?" asks Morgan, a bit facetiously.

"You didn't expect that I should simply listen as you conspire against Dnar'af's mission, did you?"

"You think we're doing this for our own benefit, m'lady? We've just started to put the pieces together, and it seems that Dnar'af isn't going to put the Sceptre to any beneficial use."

"You make it sound as if he were preparing to destroy a planet! He's only doing what he has to do! You don't have the right to interfere!"

"Don't I?"

Morgan pauses, and looks down for a minute.

"Don't you see what you have now, Suianen? He's spent untold time pining for you. I know it, I saw it in his eyes. Now there's a chance that we can throw off every curse, every restraint. You can be together again. He's old and tired with life, I can see that."

As he speaks, he idly toys with the unfinished Sceptre.

"But to have you back, it would make every day, every experience, every feeling feel brand new to him, because he'll experience it with someone he loves. I know how it feels to have that happen. Dnar'af and I are really not all that different."

Zzzzzz. Ahhhh! Fuzzies! *Snort* Zzzzzzzzzzz.

Ahhhhh! Who? What? When? Where?

After several minutes of searching, Rikard finally finds something on the screen.

"Here we go, it looks like a power conduit. It's been severed though, so we should be able to crawl through it. It goes straight into the ship for about 200 meters then we should be able to get out of it." Rikard looks down into the pitch black hole.
"We'll have to slide through one at a time, but I don't think we have a choice."
He looks up, listening to the sounds around him. The creatures are obviously getting closer to getting in. Sounds emanate from the walls all around them. It won't be long before they get in.
"It appears to be clear. You go first, Enesku. Here, take the rifle. It has a light on it. If you see any of those things in front of you, you can shoot it." Rikard pulls out his lightsaber and activates it. "And I can cover our rear. Ready?"

*thump*

Ready.

*thump*

(Enesku takes the rifle)

*thump*

(Enesku jumps into the conduit)

*crash!*

(swarms of the creatures fly in from every pore in the room. Rikard swipes at a few of them with his lightsaber, but there are too many of them, and they get between him and the conduit. He manages to take out one or two of them, but they're too fast. Then gunshots ring out as several of them fall away from him. Rikard is unarmed except a slightly crazed shoulder.

Enesku sticks her head out of the conduit)

You coming in or what?

Well, I don't know what to respond to that, dragonscale girl! I mean, here I am scared half to death with these things, and what am I supposed to do! This is ridiculous! I should just quit or separate or something before I go totally off my joint! Wauuugh!

That should have read 'grazed', not 'crazed'.

Not to mention 'unharmed' rather than 'unarmed'.

"Yeah, yeah, let's go." Rikard scrambles toward the conduit and dives in. They begin to crawl quickly through the conduit. Outside, the swarm of creatures prepare to chase.

By this time, Butrfli has appeared next to Kieran.
Dnar'af is definitly an interesting and complex character. Let me show you some highlights of our encounters with him...
With that, Butrfli chants, and a tv appears. It turns itself on and shows a brief summary of the crew's various encounters with Dnar'af.
See what I mean?

"I know this is gonna seem like a $tupid question," Grant says, leaning in to whisper to Butrfli, "but, why a TV?"

Well, duh! She obviously has the LICC IV DVD Boxed Set!!!!

Oh no! A clip show!

We need one. This episode has been going on for...about four months now?

Suianen is not really that impressed.

"But throughout all of that, did he ever go back on his word? Dnar'af's an honorable man. You're as bad as Ganteen; you fear him because he might be able to weild more power than you."

Dnar'af, meanwhile, has gotten back in his ship and redocked with the Yuqitar. He activates his communicator.

"Dnar'af to LICC. I've redocked, so if you can make your way back with the Sceptre piece, we can get you away from here."

Morgan shakes his head.

"You're not listening to me, Suianen. I'm trying to tell you that we may be able to harness this artifact to remove the curses Ganteen placed upon him and allow him a happy life for once. Dnar'af wants nothing more right now than to end his enforced existence. Do you really want Dnar'af to die, when he may have a better choice?"

Suianen mulls Keiran's words.

"I want him to be happy," she says, quietly. "I can't choose what form that happiness will take. It's his decision."

"Very well. Then we shall wait for his return."

Crawling through the conduit, Rikard and Enesku receive Dnar'af's message.

"Music to my ears," he grumbles as he moves forward, once in a while having to stop, roll, and turn around to slice through an attacking creature. As more continue to pile through the conduit, holding them off becomes increasingly difficult.
"How long have we been going?" he comments, "We've got to be close to the end by now. I'm not going to be able to slow these things down much longer.

To: Evil Executive
From: Ratings Department

The ratings report you asked for is here.

Ratings for LICC are 0.3 with a 0.1% share.
However, ratings for our new reality show, "Naked Supermodels" are at 40, with a 60% share.

Alex notices a particually interesting relic, and picks it up.
Jackson, look at this.
Jackson: Hmm.. a large relic with a big red button on it... shall we?
Alex: Sure.
The button is pressed, a wormhole opens, and several dozen naked warriors, some male, mostly female, appear and destroy the various critters that have been chasing our heroes. The job done, they streak off in various directions to go after other groups of creatures. The ones left to guard the corridor begin to exercise.
Jackson: Is it sweeps already?

Dnar'af waits as the LICC members slowly make their way back to the ship. Rikard holds up the piece of the Sceptre as he enters.

"I assume you'll be asking me to hold onto this?"

"That's right."

"Fine, as long as we can get out of here."

And they're able to do so in short order. It's a bit of a tight fit once everyone is inside, but Dnar'af is soon able to pilot them back to the canyon, where he proceeds to give the whole spiel about taking the piece to the lab.

"I suppose since none of you has anything else to do, you can all take the piece in," he concludes. "That should get it there safely."

Rikard begins to walk out of the ship but stops and turns back toward Dnar'af.

"Hey, Dnar'af," he asks, "what the hezmana were those things on that ship? Those creatures that attacked us? And did you know they were there before you put us onto that ship?"

And then, Milkshake approaches.

Excellent, everyone accounted for. I'm guessing you have the last piece? Morgan thinks he's figured the thing out, so our mutual contract may be finished pretty quick, Dnar'af.