Here's a project for anyone who's interested--list all the different dodges Klinger tried. Kudos for those who can place the episode, a triple kudos for anyone with the time and energy to put them in order. Here's a few:

Eating a jeep (38 ACROSS)
Habibi, the invisible camel
Voodoo and the dead chicken
Succumbing to "Depression"
Sitting on top of the basketball whatsis.
Zoltan, King of the Gypsies (clash of tambourine)
"Mr. Klinger", currently living in Toledo

Trying to convince everyone he was cold during the heat wave, where he later jumped in the tub with Margaret.

Half the family dying, other half pregnant.

Disguising himself as a big red bird with fuzzy pink feet.

Once in the middle of winter he claimed he had lost his hearing. He almost had it but he slipped up at the last minute.
Once he tried to set himself on fire.
Once he tried to buy a section 8 but couldnt raise the money.
Once Sidney was ready to grant his dischage but he had to sign a paper admitting that he was homosexual. He backed out at the last minute.

Pregnant ("Officers Only")
Heart murmur, double vision, falling in love with a goat ("Commander Pierce")
Thinks he's Moses ("Quo Vadis Captain Chandler")
Getting married in a wedding gown ("Springtime")
Dressing as the Statue of Liberty when General McArthur visited ("Big Mac")
Forging discharge papers for himself ("Goodbye Cruel World")
Mailing revealing photos of himself to generals

Gets a lawyer to argue that he deserves a Section 8, only it turns out that the lawyer is a fraud ("Fade In/Fade Out")
Becomes the world's greatest soldier when Col. Tucker visits and then pulls a switch to become Cleopatra, Queen of Egypt ("April Fools")

>Once in the middle of winter he claimed he had lost his hearing. He almost had it but he slipped
up at the last minute.

He did lose his hearing in one episode, but it came back.

Disguised as a peasant woman (with hairy knuckles).
Disguised as a business girl.
Planned to float a rubber boat down the Inchon River to the Sea of Japan, and then, to the Golden Gate.
Disguised as a nun.
Dressed in braids and a little girl's outfit, clutching Radar's teddy bear.
Dressed pretty much in the same outfit as Dorothy of the Wizard of Oz, with the camp mutt instead of the teddy bear.

fainting spells ("The Winchester Tapes")
applying to West Point, but he fails the entrance exams so decides to join the navy instead. ("Change Day")
eating sausage in order to exceed the army weight limit ("The MASH Olympics")

Switching himself for Winchester when the crazy patient wants a hostage to get back to Ohio in What's Up, Doc?

Threatening to send pictures of himself in a dress to a general's wife, claiming that the general is seeing him on the side.

Don't forget sitting on a flag-pole. Must've been very slow at the 4077th then. Klinger would later indicate that he'd never let his Section 8 attempts interfere with his work.

Also he volunteeered to join Hawkeye, Trapper, Frank and Radar in the exchange of patients with the Chinese ("The Yalu Brick Road"). "I'm not making it out for nutzery, maybe I can get out for bravery."

Probably the classic was:Half family dead,the
other half pregnant!

Henry: "Klinger, aren't you ashamed of yourself?"

Klinger: "Yes sir. I don't belong in the Army, sir."

Benn, how did you do that silly face? I can't figure that one out.

\clipart{crazy} =>

Showoff.

During 'Point of View' (6th season) Klinger reports to Colonel Potter wearing what has to be the most demurely tasteful outfit I ever saw him in: grey shadow-striped day dress accented with scarlet wide-brimmed hat, beads, gloves and high-heeled pumps. Think 50's society matron meeting the bridge club for lunch.
Dressed thus, he salutes, reports I-CORPS' "latest paperwork snafu", and then asks the Colonel to "please ask the General if he got those flowers I sent?"

That ep ran the other night, Kerrie. Yeah that was demure. So was the outfit Klinger wore when we first see him in "Point of View". (Although Potter does refer to the outfit as "flowing". Klinger ripped the hem of that first dress in Pre-Op). Klinger must've been feeling a bit matronly that day.

This brings up a question about Max. For much of the series he wore dresses to get that magic Section Eight discharge. Yet, too many times we see him in fatigues. Now, unless those are women's fatigues he's wearing (I've never checked to see which side the button are on), Klinger is sabotaging his Section Eight attempts. If he's going to wear women's clothing to prove he's crazy, he should be wearing them at all times. We should never see him in fatigues or other masculine apparel.

Claiming to be the Toledo Strangler who only kills women motorcycle cops.

His biggest scam though was trying to get out of the army by getting appointed to West Point!

...If he's going to wear women's clothing to prove he's crazy, he should be wearing them at all times....

You're expecting logic behaviour from a crazy person?

Forges Potters Signature on discharge papers, I believe. "Sherman T. Potter, perfecto, could fool his own mother."

Changes his mind when Potter agrees to let him put up one of his "chotchkies" and gives him a 3 day pass.