By John A. Lang on Thursday, October 31, 2002 - 4:45 pm:

Gee...no one start this until now? Hmmm

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By John A. Lang on Thursday, October 31, 2002 - 4:49 pm:

1. Kathryn Janeway & Kate Hepburn were separated at birth.
2. Female Borgs wear tight cat suits.
3. Coffee...the secret power of the Voyager.
4. #1 Holodeck program = "7 of 9 Naked
5. Janeway turned out to be one ugly Borg after assimilation.

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By ScottN on Thursday, October 31, 2002 - 5:00 pm:

6. Get this cheese to Sickbay!!!!
7. Harry gets to die over and over and over and over and...
8. Harry and the Vampire Women from Outer Space (Favorite Son)
9. Harry gets the glows

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By ScottN on Thursday, October 31, 2002 - 5:18 pm:

10. When you're 70,000 light years from home, don't bother using warp drive -- impulse is just fine.

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By Blue Berry on Thursday, October 31, 2002 - 5:41 pm:

11. A clarinet is not a good chick attractant.

We've been here before. Something or someone is erasing whole boards but leaving their titles. This has also happened with PM/Kitchen Sink/Dumb Laws.

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By ScottN on Thursday, October 31, 2002 - 5:45 pm:

Oh, no! Is the a repeat of the Great Collapsing Nitcentral Disaster of 2000?*


*Named in tribute to the Great Collapsing Hrung Disaster of Betelgeuse VII

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By John A. Lang on Thursday, October 31, 2002 - 6:36 pm:

Nah-----I just started the subject again. It was gone.

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By Sparrow47 on Friday, November 01, 2002 - 3:13 pm:

12. The journey is more important than the designation- which is why looking into faster than warp alternatives is a bad idea.

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By The Undesirable Element on Monday, November 04, 2002 - 7:01 pm:

13. Bringing down the Borg Collective is easy. Reading Klingon? That's hard.
14. Why take an ordinary phaser when a compression phaser rifle looks twice as cool.
15. Take the scenic route home. It's far more fun.
16. "The future is the past, the past is the future. It all gives me a headache." Janeway makes the most perfect time travel comment ever.
17. Anything interesting that gets sucked into the Delta Quadrant will end up within sensor range.
18. Never let Chakotay drive.
19. Try holographic Irish sex to cure your sexual tension. 9 out of 10 holographic doctors recommend it.
20. Q uses his omnipotent powers to change Janeway into a nightgown. Q Jr uses his omnipotent powers to remove Seven's clothes. Who's the smarter one here?
21. Always wait at least an hour before using a lavatory after Crewman Chell.
22. The creators of the galaxy arranged it so that all adventures will happen during the day shift or during the night shift when Harry is on duty.
23. If it looks too good to be true, it'll probably eat you.
24. Sentient gas exists. It explains some of the whoppers my roommate lets out once in a while.
25. Bioneural gel packs? Who in their right mind thought that this would be a good idea?
26. "Sometimes you just have to punch your way through."
27. Janeway could take out a Borg cube with a half a gum wrapper, a loofa, and a roll of duct tape. MacGuyver would be proud.
28. ARACHNIA! QUEEN OF THE SPIDER PEOPLE!
29. Spock never looked at Kirk that way!
30. Two Janeways are better than one.

See ya later
TUE

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By Sparrow47 on Monday, November 04, 2002 - 10:04 pm:

31. When the call comes to "brace yourselves," get up from your chair and sprint across to the back of the bridge. ("Caretaker")

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By constanze on Tuesday, November 05, 2002 - 2:19 am:

TUE,

21. Always wait at least an hour before using a lavatory after Crewman Chell

What ep. was that? What's so terrible about Chell?

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By Trike on Wednesday, November 06, 2002 - 2:22 am:

32. It doesn't matter what part of the ship is hit by enemy fire, smoke will come out of the consoles on the bridge.

33. It doesn't matter how many thousands of light years Voyager is from the Alpha Quadrant, it will encounter at least three species from there each year.

34. "Do it" is way cooler than "Make it so."

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By Stone Cold Steven Of None on Friday, November 08, 2002 - 11:25 am:

"19. Try holographic Irish sex to cure your sexual tension. 9 out of 10 holographic doctors recommend it."
Did anyone watching that scene think of Motley Crue's verse: "He's the one they call Dr. Feelgood/He's the one who'll make you feel all right"?
35) All the lame@$$ excuses, like that one, TIIC conjured up to keep Voyager's First Couple apart.

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By The Undesirable Element on Sunday, November 10, 2002 - 11:42 am:

constanze: I forget the actual episode but it was one of the ones where Voyager has malfunctions and Neelix says something like "We only have three functioning lavatories and it's getting to be a real problem, ESPECIALLY for the Bolians"

TUE

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By Scott McClenny on Sunday, November 10, 2002 - 11:54 pm:

1.Ocampa's have short lives and even shorter tempers!
2.Neelix can solve any morale problem with a nice
cup of coffee and bowl of soup!
3.If you want to be promoted NEVER try to such a nicey nice obedient Ensign,you'll end up REMAINING an Ensign until the first Voyager movie!
4.There's always a way to defeat the Borg!
5.What you think about your ancestors might not be true!
6.Even Borg can go nutso when left to themselves for too long a period!
7.Starfleet has more insane commanders than you can shake a stick at!
8.Leave time travelling to the professionals such as the Time Lords,but if you MUST travel through time and end up in 1996 L.A.be sure to take Tom Paris and a Visa card along!

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By The Undesirable Element on Monday, November 11, 2002 - 11:39 am:

28. Some people don't understand the numbering system on this board.
29. Janeway and Torres were in an ongoing competition to see who could have the most hairstyles.
30. Modesty is irrelevant.
31. Golfing attire never gets any better ("Inside Man")
32. Temporal Prime Directive? It's as dumb as it sounds.
33. No matter how advanced human civilization becomes, we're all going to turn into lizards anyway.
34. Janeway makes Ahab look stable.

See ya later
TUE

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By Blue Berry on Monday, November 11, 2002 - 1:42 pm:

34. Janeway makes Ahab look stable. -TUE

That would make Harry Ishmael. Paris is Queequeg and Chakotay is Starbuck. Braga is Melville.

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By BrianB on Tuesday, November 12, 2002 - 2:15 pm:

35. Half-K'Tarrian children grow like weeds.

36. If Neelix was such a bad cook as many cheap shots suggest, why does the crew continue to eat his cooking instead replicated food? And don't say rations. That idea was quietly relaxed about midway through.

37. The holodeck malfunction. What a crutch.

38. The Doctor bagged more babes than Kirk.

39. Seven of Nine, 82%-free of Borg cybernetics, still had all the necessary bionics that would make Inspector Gadget proud.

40. Tom Paris is such a 20th century buff that he should've been left behind in "Future's End".

41. Q appearances have been reduced to the level of Uncle Arthur visits on Bewitched.

42. Probably had the most Reset Button episodes of any Trek to date.

43. Neelix was the Guinan of Voyager.

44. Tom Paris went from plain hot tomato soup to (nuts) ha ha. I mean, from soup to pizza, popcorn, PB&J and beer.

45. Slipstream/transwarp conduit technology provided by the aliens-of-the-week is easy to duplicate, but always goes kaput after one or two uses.

46. When Voyager does get destroyed, go back in time and pull apart Seven of Nine to salvage the key to change history.

47. 47 is a very overused number.

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By ScottN, Monty Python Fan on Tuesday, November 12, 2002 - 2:51 pm:

It should have been,

47. There is NOOOOO Item 47.
48. 47 is a very overused number.

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By constanze on Wednesday, November 13, 2002 - 1:34 am:

Brian,

36. If Neelix was such a bad cook as many cheap shots suggest, why does the crew continue to eat his cooking instead replicated food?

Ah, its because Neelix is morale officer! He knows that no matter what he cooks, some of the crew will complain (all these aliens and alien foods), so he does it on purpose. If the crew is constantly complaining (or teasing) about the food, they are too busy to be frightened about alien-of-the-week, how far from home they are, etc.

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By TomM on Wednesday, November 13, 2002 - 3:06 am:

I'd always thought (especially since the complaints were mostly in the first two seasons) that Neelix was a decent cook, but Leola Root and other Delta Quadrant "delicasies" were an aquired taste.

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By ScottN on Wednesday, November 13, 2002 - 9:31 am:

Actually, constanze, you may have hit on something there...

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By Sparrow47 on Wednesday, November 13, 2002 - 3:00 pm:

49. If the end is getting back to the Alpha Quadrant, and the means is possibly letting the Borg get their hands on technology from the future, not to mention radically changing history, then the ends justify the means.

49a. If the end is the preservation of a planet made entirely of water, and the means is the destruction of the alien mining operations slowly destroying said planet, then the ends do not justify the means.

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By Anonymous on Wednesday, November 13, 2002 - 4:54 pm:

BrianB says:
43. Neelix was the Guinan of Voyager.

The only difference being that Guinan was a lot less annoying.

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By Trike on Thursday, November 14, 2002 - 12:49 am:

50. Neelix was a lot more annoying than Guinan. (Hey, it belonged on the list.)
51. A female Klingon who is not pregnant will sometimes wear a large overcoat that covers her belly for nine months. But a female Klingon who is pregnant won't wear such an overcoat.

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By Josh M on Sunday, November 17, 2002 - 9:40 pm:

52. Species 8472
53. Maybe the Delta Flyer should've had fins
54. Too many Borg can be a bad thing
55. It is possible to make a bad Q episode
56. Shuttles are so easy to build and repair, you can lose them and crash them all you want, you'll still have an endless supply
57. It's hard to keep the number of crew on the ship straight
58. Alice Krige is the Borg Queen
59. Q2: Now there's a good portrayal of the Borg
60. A Galaxy-Class Starship lasts about 30 seconds in a battle with a standard Borg Cube; Voyager lasts for about 30 seconds against a Borg Sphere (Drone, Endgame); However, Voyager can easily engage and sustain a battle with an advanced Borg Tactical Cube (Unimatrix)

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By Will on Thursday, November 21, 2002 - 10:32 am:

60. 'Some kinda' is the correct wording in any explanation to your commander.
61. The food replicators need to stay off line to conserve power, but the holodecks can remain on full power for the entire trip home.
62. It's a really good idea to have your only helmsman also be a second doctor, instead of training one of your science specialists.
63. In the 24th century, people will be fascinated with 20th century things (tv, cars), but not 21st century or 22nd century items.
64. Borg kids pose no reall threat. Bring 'em aboard!
65. Kes needed glasses; she was in love with Neelix.
66. Even though you want your Borg to accept that she's human, and has her freedom, don't ever call her by her human name, or encourage her to do so.
67. Kazon; WORST HAIRSTYLES IN THE GALAXY!!!
68. Considering it's curse, Voyager could have been designated NCC-74666, not NCC-74656.
69. When your first officer and chief engineer have been killed, it's a good idea to replace them with Maquis operatives.

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By Anonymous on Thursday, November 28, 2002 - 10:44 am:

70. Every time we discover a slipstream/ transwarp drive that only works for a few seconds, but takes a year or two off the trip home, don't even think about doing the same thing every other day or so.

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By Matt Pesti on Saturday, November 30, 2002 - 10:14 pm:

1. The Borg can become dull.
2. That a minor barfly at Quark's in a Behr-Wolfe script is far more intresting than a regular in a Braga script.
3. Someone can have a best friend we have never met before the episode they died in.
4. The ability to save a computer program, and the concept of RAM has been lost in the 24th century.
5. Creating intresting aliens is a 20 year process.
6. A crainial lump counts as a alien species.
7. They should have given the ship to Riker.
8. Holographic rights. Because 90's social causes were really weak for scripts.
9. The Rock vs. Seven of Nine.
10. The first African American Vulcan.
11. The best actor to play a Vulcan is a bit player from "Lower Decks."

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By A Counter on Saturday, November 30, 2002 - 10:59 pm:

Matt, learn to count. YOu need to start at 71.

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By Stone Cold Steven Of None on Saturday, December 28, 2002 - 11:24 am:

72) Alicia Coppola. Lieutenant Stadi LIVES:-)!
73) Musetta Vander, who guest starred in "The Disease".
74) Lori Hallier, who guest starred in "Unity" as She Who Must Never - AND STONE COLD STEVEN OF NONE _MEANS_ NEVER! - Be Named In The Company Of Brokenhearted J/Cers.
75) Becky Ann Baker, who played Captain Janeway's spirit guide in "Sacred Ground".
76) That magical scene in "Juggernaut" in which Lieutenant Torres takes off her shirt to reveal a full crowd in the balcony.

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By BrianB on Friday, April 04, 2003 - 1:16 pm:

77. If you've just been killed and your position aboard Voyager is not "unique" enough, you will not be revived by Seven of Nine's wonderful nanoprobes.
78. If you've just been killed and Seven of Nine would not save you, you can be discarded into the vacuum of space where some alien race will come for you, revive you, make you one of them and you can live the rest of your natural life (or longer???) as a different person. Almost as bad as Borg assimilation.

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By ScottN on Friday, April 04, 2003 - 3:38 pm:

11. The best actor to play a Vulcan is a bit player from "Lower Decks."

I'm assuming you're not including Leonard Nimoy and Mark Lenard in that list.

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By 2-Cents Worth on Wednesday, May 28, 2003 - 12:40 am:

Seventy-Eleven.

Could the moderator renumber all these or is this one big joke on the inconsistencies of Voyager

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By 2-Cents Worth on Wednesday, May 28, 2003 - 12:42 am:

Seventy-Twelve.

The Temporal Prime Directive is the PrimeTime Directive.-its only used between 6:00PM and 10:30PM

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By The Count form Sesame Street on Wednesday, May 28, 2003 - 12:46 am:

73. Voyager has 5000 Photon torpedos made with duranium shadows and Thoran Fields.

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By Thande on Tuesday, December 23, 2003 - 6:10 am:

74: 'We are the Borg. You won't be assimilated. Your biological and technological distinctiveness will not be added to our own. Your race and culture won't adapt to serve us. Because you'll beat us with two sharp sticks and a bent beer can. Resistance is always successful'.

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By Thande on Sunday, January 18, 2004 - 12:46 pm:

75. It's okay to pinch the names of alien races off of Star Wars.

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By Cindy on Monday, July 12, 2004 - 11:17 am:

The two best things about Voyager were the characters of Seven of Nine and the holographic doctor. They were great!

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By John A. Lang on Friday, November 12, 2004 - 10:46 am:

76: Only the Captain gets the violate the Prime Directive. (Thirty Days)

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By John A. Lang on Monday, November 15, 2004 - 10:21 am:

77. Coffee addiction runs in the family (11:59)

78. 7 of 9 looks hot with her hair down (Someone to Watch Over Me)

79. Computers make lousy story tellers (Once Upon A Time)

80. Sometime you're just not the person you're supposed to be! (Course: Obilivion)

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By John A. Lang on Sunday, January 02, 2005 - 4:23 am:

81. Deanna Troi in the skin-tight swimsuit! MEOW! (Inside Man)

82. Time travel can be accomplished simply by changing decks. (Shattered)

83. The EMH has virtually little security protection. Anybody can just waltz in and kidnap him whenever they feel like it. (Any EMH kidnapping episode)

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By Chris Booton (Cbooton) on Sunday, January 02, 2005 - 7:53 pm:

84. Action Kate with her kick *** phaser rifle gibbing macro virri. Say what you want about Seven of Nine but nothing beats Janeway kicking bad buy butt :D

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By ScottN on Sunday, January 02, 2005 - 9:15 pm:

Chris, I agree. Macrocosm, with Janeway-as-Ripley is one of my guilty pleasures.

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By Stone Cold Steven Of None on Wednesday, January 26, 2005 - 8:54 pm:

Mine, too; that ep vindicated my "Starfleet Uniforms Have Built-In Corsets" theory.
I had no idea - AND STONE COLD STEVEN OF NONE _MEANS_ NO IDEA! - that La Mulgrew had such a _set_ until she took her jacket off.

85) Captain Janeway getting a coffee hit in Bride Of Chaotica.
86) Season 1-2 Chakotay's graying buzzcut.
87) Season 3 Kes' catsuits. No sex appeal? Please.
88) The final scene from Equinox, Part 2, in which the First Couple recover the ship's plaque:
"It's never fallen down before."
"Let's put it back where it belongs."
89) "When diplomacy fails, there's only one alternative: Violence."
90) Captain Janeway in a white pantsuit in Future's End, Part 1; I couldn't help but think of Q's snide quip from Death Wish.
91) Barbie of Borg in that red dress from Human Error.
92) And in that PINK one from Equinox, Part 2.
93) Any time Captain Janeway smiled. I remembered thinking: Who could say no to her?
94) The scene from Muse where "Janeway" and "Chakotay" kissed: As close as we _ever_ got to the First Couple finally getting it on.
95) That total dunsel Lt. Barclay should've been assimilated by the Borg instead of showing up here.

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By John-Boy on Saturday, March 12, 2005 - 10:51 am:

100) How i use to the the last 3 seasons of Voyager wern't all that great, until Star Trek Enterprise came out. Now all 172 episodes of Voyager seem golden compaired to that trash!

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By Stone Cold Steven Of None on Monday, March 14, 2005 - 8:55 pm:

You forgot reasons 96-99.

96) The Voyager-From-The-Aliens'-POV eps, notably:
Distant Origin; Living Witness; Blink Of An Eye; and Muse.
97) Ensign Kim saves the ship and the crew several times over and never gets promoted; yet that candy@$$ Not Nicholas Locarno - a _total_ screwup - just because he designs a holographic sex toy for the captain, does.
98) Jeri Ryan and Brannon Braga hooked up here.
99) From Resolutions: The scene where the crew, working together, escape the Vidiian ambush, AND get the meds the First Couple need. That was one of the best scenes of the entire series, IMO.

I can't believe I got beat out of #100.
$ucks to be me.

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By Influx on Tuesday, March 15, 2005 - 6:17 am:

Here ya go, Stone Cold:

100)The ability to use time travel whenever needed
99) or The Big Reset Button

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By John A. Lang on Wednesday, January 25, 2006 - 12:25 pm:

101: EVERY DAY is a "bad hair day" for the Kazon. So...don't provoke them.

102: Using the "Atomic Clock" on Voyager is useless. (Especially with all the time-line violations)

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By Matt Pesti on Saturday, March 25, 2006 - 4:34 pm:

103. You have two alien species to use as the major villian. The first is the Videans, a race of medics who are fighting a horrible virus that is in the process of destroying their entire race, and in order to survive, most have been reduced to harvesting organs. Not because they want to, but because they have to. The second is the Kazon. They want water. And the transporter. They also act like the Klingons. You choose B, but regret it later on.

104. Voyager's got a dozen phaser arrrays and four torpedo tubes, all of which can be knocked off line with one hit to the "weapons array".

105. "You're clear to dock in shuttlebay 2." Where the heck is that?

106. Useful and reasonably reliable transportation methods are easy to come by, so why use them? (coaxial warp drive in "Vis a vis", warp 10 dilithium and a bit of surgery in "Threshold")

107. Starfleet quartermasters are so dilligent that they travel 70,000 light years to get the crew the newest phasers and tricorders after season 1.

108. Voyager having more rear cargo space than the Ford Excursion, holding countless shuttlecraft, the Delta Flyer, and Neelix's ship.

109. Let Seven of Nine explore her humanity by making her sleep in the cargo bay.

110. The incredible coolness of the Excelsior in "Flashback" (especially that red alert strobe light!)

111. No matter how far you go, you'll always run into the same aliens (how exactly did the Talaxians get 40,000 light years away from their homeworld?).

112. Why go for the Idran end of the Bajoran wormhole when Borg space is so much more fun!

113. Cloaking devices? Who needs 'em!

114. If you don't like how Voyager gets home, go ahead and do it again. (see "Timeless" and "Endgame")

115. Captain LaForge. One of my favorite characters from TNG gets a well-deserved promotion.

116. Voyager crew helping the omnipotent Q through morality struggles, civil wars, and child-rearing (and never getting zapped back home for their troubles!).

117. Technobabble doesn't necessarily make a concept believable. (see any season 1 or 2 episode).

118. We're on UPN now, so let loose with the blood and gore! (again, see any season 1 or 2 episode).

119.If Admiral Janeway died, what will happen to Captain Janeway ten years from now? (Voyagers' time).

120.Tom's line "Does anyone know where the bridge is" in Twisted.

121. We, in our present day and age, have the ability to backup and/or copy computer files and programs, but in Voyager's time, you cannot back up a holographic medical doctor's program no matter what danger is facing said program. This can also be applied to holodeck programs.

122.Living Witness had a backup Emh, 700 years into their future!

123. This applies to TNG as well: So many systems have been rerouted so many times that the sonic showers now keep the warp core working.

Hi Angela mind me asking what was your first Trek you ever saw and how old? and where are ya?

see my answer -

124. It's possible to make a bad Borg episode(hey, "Descent, Part II" was a masterpiece compared to Voyager's Borg episodes).

125: An entire episode can be summed up with one word titles.

126.The singing Emh in Tinker ,Tinker

127.the photonic cannon as good as Kirk's corbomite maneauver.

128.
the helmlady in Warhead.Mackenzie somebody?

129.Barcely trying to blow up Voyager.

130.How many shuttles does Voyager has?

131.Kirk got mentioned three times in the series

132. The Borg Baby (well, at least WE remembered it! :P )